


It Broke Me

by DannyBonamuffin



Category: Captain America (Movies), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Anal Sex, Avengers - Freeform, Avengers: Age of Ultron (Movie) Spoilers, Bucky Barnes Remembers, Civil War (Marvel), F/M, Gay Sex, James Buchanan Barnes - Freeform, Love Triangles, M/M, Open Relationships, Oral Sex, Steve Rogers Feels, Stony - Freeform, Stucky - Freeform, Superhusbands, Tony Stark Feels, Tony Stark Needs a Hug, Winter Soldier Bucky Barnes, bi tony stark, steve rogers - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-12-05
Updated: 2019-06-18
Packaged: 2019-09-12 05:23:35
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 12
Words: 76,550
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16866925
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DannyBonamuffin/pseuds/DannyBonamuffin
Summary: What REALLY was going on during those times where the Avengers were fighting robots, dropping cities out of the sky, and civil war-ing each other?  This has multiple chapters. Stony then Stucky.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> My first work in years. I had previously never posted any before. I followed the movies very closely in this work to get the ball rolling and tell my version of this story. (a.k.a. riddled with movie spoilers) HOWEVER I changed what I wanted. I love comments, I love feedback. Thanks for reading!

Time:2015  
Chapter 1  
Location:Hawkeye’s farm

The team had been taken to the farm in the midst of all the Ultron drama. Steve was talking to Tony in Clint’s backyard while they chopped wood and the conversation seemed to be getting heated.

“You know Ultron’s trying to tear us apart right?” Tony huffed, putting his hands on his hips. He was wearing a long sleeve black shirt with jeans. “Well I guess you would know.” said Steve pointedly, his biceps bulging in a tight light blue t-shirt. “Whether you tell us is a bit of a question.”

Tony projected, “Banner and I were doing research-” 

“That would affect the team!” interrupted Steve. “That would end the team. Isn't that the mission? Isn't that why we fight, so we can end the fight, so we get to go home?” said Tony.

Steve rolled his eyes, “Every time someone tries to win a war before it starts, innocent people die. Every time.” The men made silent tense eye contact for a minute before Clint’s pregnant wife came out to greet them. “Sorry, Mr.Stark?” She said.

He smiled at her, “Yes Ma’am?”

“Our tractor is broken, and I know you are a mechanic so…” she laughed, embarrassed. Tony held up his hands, “Say no more. I will take a look.” She thanked him and waddled back into the house.

Tony looked back at Steve, “You coming with me to finish this conversation?” He shrugged and followed him into the barn. To their surprise, Nick Fury was waiting for them inside. He gave them intel on Ultron they needed and excused himself to the house to update the rest of the team.

Tony began opening up the tractor. It turns out it actually did need to be fixed. He went to Clint’s workbench and began rummaging for certain tools. Steve stayed in the barn, sitting on a bail of hay watching him, “So you are actually going to fix it?”

“Yeah it doesn’t need much.” said Tony, making a bunch of racket in the toolbox.

“Are we going to finish-” Steve started to say. “Please,” Tony paused, “say what you want to say, Rogers.”

“I don’t think we can win this one, Tony. I had someone in my head. We can’t fight that, and like Fury said, Ultron is everywhere, multiplying all the time.”

Tony crossed his arms, “Is that the attitude we want to keep?”

“I was already hurting and that mind melder….she...made everything worse.” said Steve, whimpering at the last word. He looked exhausted all of a sudden like his thoughts and memories had been beating him down for a while.

Anthony spoke quickly, almost rambling, “We have all had our issues, Cap. I for one had to be put on medication and I, oh yeah, have this glowing thing on my chest connected to my heart to keep me alive. We all have our stuff. She made me see things too-” Steve shook his head, “This vision… it broke me.”

He tried his hardest not to start crying in front of another avenger, but he and Tony always seemed to be closer than the others. Steve felt the heat of tears rolling down his face. He wiped them off as soon as they appeared.  
Tony sighed and walked over to sit next to him and put an arm around his waist, “Hey, hey....”

Steve pushed him off at first, “Don’t.” Tony pulled him into a hug, “Come here, Cap.” He went limp and let Tony hug him. The tears flooded Steve’s eyes and he began sobbing quietly into his shoulder. This was so embarrassing. He was supposed to be the super soldier with concrete emotions. 

After a minute of his break down, Tony pulled back and looked at his red and blotchy face, “Are you ready to talk about it?”

Steve stared at his feet and nodded, “I guess.”

“I’ve never seen you like this before.” said Tony, concerned, “It’s okay though. This is a non-judgement zone.”

“Remember what Natasha told you about before? How I had to fight my friend?” “Yes.”  
“I’ve been messed up ever since.” said Steve, “He was my everything. Then I thought he was dead and I felt responsible. Then he wasn’t dead and tried to kill me. It was too much.”

Tony nodded, listening intently.

“I haven’t been sleeping recently,”continued Steve, “because every time I start to doze off I seem to see his angry face screaming and running toward me. I see the hate and anger in his eyes as he fights me. Either that or I see him fall off the train and scream for my help. I can’t stop dreaming about him.”

“You saw him in your vision?” asked Tony.

“Yes, but we were….dancing.” Steve said, stifling more tears, “We were at the old hall from when we were in Brooklyn and we're wearing our military uniforms. Buck was telling me about how excited he was that the war was over. He was smiling and joking with me again. We were the only ones in the entire dance hall-” He struggled with the rest of his words. He knew what Tony had said about not judging him but couldn’t help but hold back from telling him everything.

“And?” Tony urged. Steve sighed, feeling like a complete teenage girl, “Bucky...kissed me and held my hand up to look at our engagement rings. He said I was going to make him the luckiest man alive and he couldn’t wait to build our lives together.” 

Tony sat back slowly and nodded, “Oh. When you said he was your everything, you meant...you were in love with him?”

Steve covered his face with his hands, “Please don’t share that with the team.”

“Of Course not, I told you I wasn’t going to judge and I am not. This doesn’t leave the barn. But Steve, at least you got to see what you truly desired not what you were truly scared of.” he offered, patting his shoulder.

Steve uncovered his face and shook his head, “She tormented me with that vision, Tony. It was all we wanted back then but we never said it. I tried to get over him. I tried to get girls in my life, but no one compares to him. We knew each other our whole lives. God, I feel so ridiculous.”

Tony sighed, “You are not ridiculous. Love is something you can’t control and you two were just victims of your time. You couldn’t express anything like that in the 40s. Don’t feel guilty.”

Natasha came jogging into the barn, “Hey guys.” They both sat up straight and turned their attention to her. “So Laura made dinner. There is enough for everyone. It’s meat and potatoes!” she said.

“Sounds great, let’s go.” Tony said cheerily, patting Cap on the back. Steve gave a weak smile and they all walked back to the house to enjoy their first home cooked meal in a long time. The team ate together and spoke with Fury more about their gameplan. 

As it got dark, the team split off into different rooms to go to sleep. 

Tony offered to sleep on the couch in the living room but he couldn’t. He lie awake, staring at the ceiling thinking about what Steve had said and stressing about his own vision. (Everyone was dead and it was all Anthony’s fault.)

Steve stayed up in the kitchen booth, reading the only novel he recognized from Clint’s bookshelf. He was tired, but the flashes of memories prevented him from really feeling it. 

The night was so quiet outside in the country. The only thing that could be heard was the chirping crickets outside. 

Tony approached him with a knitted blanket around his shoulders, “Can’t sleep still huh?”  
Steve looked up from his book, “I told you I haven’t been.”

“Want to step out on the back porch with me for a minute?” Tony asked.

“Sure, for what?” he closed his book and put it on the table.

Tony smiled, “Uh, if I am honest….the only thing that helps me sleep now is a joint. So I’m uh...going to smoke it.” He pulled out a little joint from his pocket. 

Shaking his head, Steve reluctantly agreed, following him out to the two rocking chairs on the back porch. The moon was big and beautiful that night. All the stars in the sky could be seen due to lack of city lights. 

Tony admired the stars with wide eyes as he put the joint in his mouth and lit it.

“This place is beautiful.” commented Steve who was also staring out at the night sky.

“Yeah,” inhaled Tony, “Clint really has himself a nice little nest egg here doesn’t he? This is the kind of life I thought I wanted when my dad died. I thought I was going to do everything he didn’t but now I have multiple houses, all of them in booming cities and I’m still not happy.” He laughed at the end of his statement bitterly. This triggered a coughing fit he fought to suppress.

Steve looked over his face, “Well you and Pepper could still do it. You could buy a place like this that you hire someone else to fix up and have some kids-”

 

“Whoah whoah whoah. I never said I wanted kids.” laughed Tony. His face fell as he dragged his raw cone, “Besides, me and Pepper uh….we are taking a break for the moment.”

“You split up?” Steve said, turning his gaze from the sky.

Tony shrugged, “I guess? It wasn’t really up to me. She just...hasn’t been happy for a long time.” Steve tilted his head and sighed, “I’m so sorry. I didn’t know.”

“It’s okay. If I was her I would dump me too. She was almost turned into a human bomb 2 Christmases ago, that is reason enough right there.” he joked.

Steve leaned over and patted his shoulder, “Hey.” he said. As if to stay “You can stop joking.”.

 

Tony shook his head, “I know. I’ll be fine. I have bigger things on my mind anyway and that is partially why she dumped me too. I am not emotionally involved enough. Loving me is dangerous. Always will be.”

He finally met Cap’s gaze. Steve could see Stark’s eyes glaze over and wondered if he was stoned or just really sad. Tony took another long drag of his joint and smirked, “You and I are just in a small broken hearts club, Rogers.”

A moment of silence fell between them. The heroes listened to the simplicity of the crickets and admired the farm lit by only moonlight. Tony finished his joint and snubbed it on his shoe.

“I’m sorry,” Cap broke the silence, “about what I said to you earlier.”

“What you said?” Tony asked.

“I’m sorry I accused you of creating Ultron because you were careless.” he elaborated, “I know you didn’t mean to and I understand your guilt you feel now even though it wasn’t your fault.”

This made Tony give him a side smile, “You don’t have to apologize.”

“No, I was wrong. I felt the same way as you do. I should have been more sympathetic. It can’t be easy to be expected to have all the answers all the time.” said Steve.

Tony looked in his eyes deeply. He saw the sincerity in them as well as the vivid icy blue color. Steve really was the kind of guy who wanted to do right by everybody. It made Tony feel a little guilty too.

“I shouldn’t have been unsympathetic to your situation like I was at first.” admitted Anthony, “My anxiety and my break-up issues did not excuse me being an asshole.”

“Isn’t being an asshole your thing though?” Steve rused with a smile.

Tony sat back and dropped his jaw, “Steve Rogers, did you just say a naughty language word?”

“Will you cut it out with that?” he laughed in response. “It’s already bad from everyone else.” They chuckled together, content for a minute.  
Tony jumped up with a jolt, “Oh! I almost forgot to fix that tractor. You want to come?”

“Can you fix a tractor while you are stoned?” asked Steve, raising one eyebrow.

“Honey, I can do anything when I’m stoned.” Tony said with a girly tone. He chuckled and followed him down into the barn. They turned on the low oil lamp (that must have been there since the 1800s) and Steve held it over the tractor while Tony worked with the tools.  
After he finished, Tony went to the outdoor sink and washed his hands vigorously of auto grease. “And that is how you do it.” He looked at his watch, “Hmm only took me half an hour longer than normal.”

Steve hung the oil lamp on the nearby hook, “Are you ready to sleep now?”

Tony wrapped his knitted blanket back around his own shoulders, “I tell ya what, come with me in the living room. The couch actually pulls out to a king bed and I’ll try and sleep if you do.”

Steve stared at him in the dim light of the lamp. Was he suggesting they share a bed together? He was a little confused by the gesture, “Um-”

Tony put his hands up defensively, “We are both tired and haven’t been able to shut off. Let’s just try together to actually get some sleep. If we honestly can’t, then at least we have one another to talk to.” It seemed like a good idea. Steve nodded and turned off the oil lamp.

They started back out of the barn. “Did you have a lamp like that when you were a kid?” asked Anthony in his token snarky tone.

Steve shoved his shoulder and smiled, “Oh shut up.” Tony chuckled a lot harder than normal due to the THC in his system. He loved getting a rise out of Captain America.

They went to the living room and expanded the bed. Tony took off his jeans, leaving on his boxers and shirt, then laid down in the bed with a plop. “Oooh.” he groaned, “This may be the comfiest couch bed I have ever been on.”

Steve slipped off his t-shirt to expose his perfectly sculpted chest. Tony felt a twinge in his boxers. Oh FUCK not now. He clambered to grab his thick knitted blanket from the floor and draped it over himself.

Steve then undid his belt buckle and dropped his pants. He was wearing tight boxer briefs that showed off his thick muscular thighs, toned round ass, and a seemingly large penis. By the time he stepped out of his pants he realized Tony was staring.

“Sorry, is this okay? This is how I sleep.” asked Steve, gesturing at his body.

“It’s fine. Feeling a little small compared to your XL super serum muscles, that’s all.” said Tony.

Steve crawled into the bed on Tony’s right, first getting on his knees to drape his blanket over his side of the bed. Tony’s eyes averted to that beautiful round ass pointing at his face. It was pretty hard to miss.

Pepper and Tony had been split up for the past couple months so he hadn’t had sex in a very long time...for him. Back when he was whoring around on business trips he used to get 5 different girls (or boys) in a weekend. He went from that to a strict loving relationship to nothing at all. Anthony was just feeling a little bit of withdrawal, nothing more. At least that is what he told himself.

The bulge in Tony’s boxers became more prominent, so he had to cup himself with both hands to prevent Steve from noticing. “Goodnight Rogers.” he said softly.

Steve rolled onto his right side facing away from Tony, “Night.” 

Tony closed his eyes and willed it away. “C’mon,” he thought, “go down. I’m so stupid for smoking weed tonight, that shit gets me right up. You should have known better.”

Steve sighed deeply and curved his body a bit. His perfect ass backed up a little more toward Tony.

He stared hungrily at him in the moonlight, “The things I would do to him…” he thought, then, “NO! Stoppit, Tony. He is your friend and you are just vulnerable from the current state of things and you are sex deprived and stoned. You just need to get it down.” 

They lay there quietly for about an hour. Neither were falling asleep. Steve huffed and rolled over to face him, “You down yet?” he whispered.

Tony was still cupping himself under his blanket but his dick was finally getting soft, “Nope I got nothing.”

Steve propped himself up on his elbows which made his pecs and abs glisten in the moonlight from the window. That made Tony’s dick go right back up again. He was so God-damn beautiful. Cap scooted back and sat up against the back of the couch, “I would say let’s watch TV but apparently Clint doesn’t have one.”

Tony lay stiff, staring at the ceiling, “It’s okay.” Steve studied his face, “I thought smoking helps you sleep.”

“Under normal circumstances, yes. Right now with a crazy robot trying to destroy humanity, I’m having issues.” he replied, trying not to look at him. 

“Is that all? Are you having flashes too?” asked Steve, concerned by his stiffness. Anthony looked away, the blanket was pulled up to his chin, “Yeah something like that.”

Steve stretched and yawned, “This is so stupid. I really am tired. I feel it.” Tony nodded, “Me too.” 

“We could go...chop all the rest of Clint’s wood. That might make us tired enough to sleep.” suggested Steve. “I’ll give you some wood.” Tony thought, then mentally slapped himself.

“I couldn’t do that again today. I think I hurt my shoulder earlier.” said Tony.

Steve rubbed his right shoulder for him, “This one?” That sent chills through his entire body. Laughing uncomfortably, Tony scooted away and sat up with him, “No, my left. I will be okay.”

Steve raised an eyebrow at him. He was being really jumpy all of a sudden. “What?” Tony demanded. 

“Maybe I should go sleep somewhere else. Perhaps being alone in the silence is what we need.” he offered. Tony sank a bit, “Do whatever you need to do.” 

Steve shrugged and leaned over to hug him. He immediately jolted backward, “What’re you doing?”

“I’m giving you a hug.” said Steve confusingly with his arms extended toward him. “What for?” said Tony accusingly. “I’m saying goodnight. What’s the problem?” asked Steve. 

“No problem,” Tony laughed nervously, clutching the blanket, “you just, uh, took me by surprise is all.”

Steve eyes darted down to his blanket then back up at him again. He was slowly figuring it out. Then it hit him, finally. “It’s okay, Tony.” he smiled, “It happens to all of us late at night or early in the morning. We are both guys here. It’s fine.”

Tony’s stomach was tied in knots. He was so embarrassed. “What are you talking about?” he scoffed at Cap. “Oh c’mon, I know you’re hard under there. Nothing to be ashamed of.” said Steve pointing at his blanket, “I can go so you can...do your thing.”

He started to get out of the bed. “Wait.” squeaked out Tony, closing his eyes. This made Steve stop and turn to look back at him. “Maybe….you could….help?” asked Tony slowly, opening his eyes after the last word.

Steve went stiff, looking a little confused but still with his normal sympathetic expression, “Excuse me?”

Tony rubbed the back of his head nervously. Why the hell did he just say that. He probably just scared the shit out of him. “Fuck, way to go.” he thought to himself while panicking, “Just tell him you were kidding.”

“Oh c’mon, Rogers I am just messing with you. Lighten up.” lied Tony. “You’re such a comedian tonight it seems.” said Steve, squinting at him.

“You’ve never seen me high before.” Tony said quickly, trying to defuse the situation.

“Oh it’s the dope huh?” inquired Steve, “Cut it out, Tony.” That was his friend, he knew when Anthony was trying to tell him what he wanted to hear to avert the conversation.

Tony shrugged, “It wasn’t a very funny joke, I’ll give you that.” Steve crawled toward him, “How would I help anyway?” Tony furrowed his brow and straightened his seated position. He didn’t know if he was being serious or getting him back.

“W-what?” Tony whispered. “How would…”Steve crawled closer so he was just about hovering over him on his hands and knees, “I help? How would you want me to help?”

Cap looked down at his shocked face and examined him. He was feeling restless and maybe this is what he needed all along. Steve had just been worried about the things he had done wrong, never thinking about what he could do to make himself feel better. 

Tony shuddered as he felt Cap’s breath on his face. He chuckled awkwardly a little, “Okay Steve, you made your point. I won’t joke like that anymore.”

“No no no,” Steve said smoothly, “you wanted to ask for my help. You got it, just tell me how I can.” Very slowly he was leaning into Anthony’s face. His eyes kept darting down to his lips. “Tell me what to do.” said Steve low and hungry.

Tony really loved to take charge in times like these. He loved when people begged for his instruction. This was all weird and sudden though. He didn’t know if he could just go with it and show that side of himself to his friend. Tony just held his hands up defensively as if to say he wasn’t going to make a move. 

“I have to do everything?” huffed Steve. He wasn’t very experienced and he hadn’t had sex in almost a hundred years. “Are you sure this is what you want?” asked Tony. Steve drew back the blanket off of his lap to expose his hard cock straining against the fabric of his boxers.

“It’s what we both want.” said Steve, running his hand over Anthony’s thigh toward his dick.

Tony hissed and grabbed both sides of his face for a deep and feverish kiss. Their tongues wrestled together. Steve started to rub against his cloth covered cock while they kissed. This made Tony moan into his mouth and run his hands through Steve’s hair.

They pulled back for air. Steve straddled Tony and dipped his hand into his boxers, “Now if we are going to do this…” Tony inhaled sharply when he felt his dick being stroked and stared at the incredible sexy specimen before him. He moaned softly. Steve covered his mouth, “You need to be quiet.”

Tony slipped off his own shirt, “Sorry,” he whispered, “I thought you wanted to be told what to do, not me.” Steve smiled and dipped down to kiss his neck while he jerked off Tony. The quiet sighs and groans from Anthony’s lips were so delicious. It was making Cap painfully hard as well while he kissed him and touched him. He mindlessly was grinding his erection against Tony’s leg, which he didn’t mind.

Steve squeaked in surprise when he felt Tony’s hands cup his ass and squeeze. He began speeding up the rhythm of his hand. Tony thrusted against his hand while plunging his tongue deep into his mouth. It was sending electric waves through his whole body. With a gasp, he exploded all over his own chest and Steve’s hand. He was lying on his back by now panting. Steve got up and grabbed tissue to wipe them both off. 

Tony smiled at him when he came back and sat at his side of the bed. “That was amazing, Rogers. Truly.” 

Steve shrugged, “Thanks?” Tony jolted up and scooted up behind him to rest his chin on Cap’s shoulder. He looked down and noticed the gigantic hard on Steve was harboring in his boxer briefs. 

Anthony ran his hand down that chiseled chest to his cock and held it. “Mmm,” Tony moaned in his ear. Steve hissed. “Seems like it’s your turn to receive help huh?” he asked, rubbing his hand up and down his silky cloth covered shaft.

“Sure.” Steve managed to stutter out.

Tony hopped out of bed and got down on his knees in front of him. He pushed Steve lightly to lay back. Steve was getting nervous, “Wait, Tony I’ve never-” “Shh.” Tony whispered, slipping his friend’s underwear down to his ankles, “It doesn’t matter.”

Steve closed his eyes and clutched the sheets as Tony gave him no warning and dropped his mouth onto his cock. He began stroking and sucking in an expert fashion. With his free hand he reached up to play with Steve’s nipple. Steve didn’t realize how much he would enjoy something like this. He also didn’t realize Tony was going to be so good at it. 

It was really difficult to hold back from thrusting into his mouth. The friction on his cock was driving Steve crazy as well as the tingling sensation of having his nipples flicked. Tony stared up at him the whole time, drinking him in. He reached his free hand all the way up Steve’s chest to his throat.

Tony’s fingertips danced near his face. Steve leaned his head up and kissed his hand. He looked down at Tony watching him lustfully, so he decided to do something he saw in a recent movie. Steve sucked on his fingers which made Tony’s eyes darken. He moaned around his cock, sending vibrations through him.

“God, Tony….” moaned Steve breathily, “I’m going to-” He kept sucking. Steve tapped his shoulder, “Um….T-Tony?”

Tony wasn’t stopping. He brought both hands down to hold his cock steady while he sucked faster. “Ughh!!” Steve groaned softly, releasing into Tony’s mouth and down his throat. He swallowed it quickly without even flinching. The only thing that could be heard was their soft pants. Tony wiped his mouth and pulled Cap’s underwear up for him.

Tony loomed over his heated exquisite body, kissing his stomach up to his chest to his throat. 

“Wow…”breathed Steve, “you are….really um...skilled at that.” That made Tony smile. His word choices were so odd sometimes when he didn’t know how to express himself.

Anthony laid down next to him on his side and stroked his chest with one hand. “Thank you...you are so….hot, Steve. Do you even understand how beautiful you are?” he said, staring at that glorious six pack again.

“Is that what you say to all your suitors?” mumbled Steve, still trying to come down from his cloud.

“No I usually say ‘That was great get out please.’” giggled Tony. Steve shook his head. “I really think you are gorgeous.” Tony said seriously. He blushed in response.

“I’m going to brush my teeth. You’ve finally exhausted me enough to sleep, Rogers.” said Tony, getting up and putting his shirt back on. “Same.” mumbled Steve, adjusting himself to the left side of the bed.

Anthony went to brush his teeth and by the time he got back, Steve was asleep.

His angelic face was even prettier when he slept. Tony crawled into bed next to him and drifted off as well. They finally got the rest they needed


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the first hook up, Tony and Steve got to adjust.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tony's drunk in this one.

Time:2015, post Ultron Fight  
Chapter 2  
Location: Avengers Facility Upstate New York

Thor, Tony, and Steve were standing outside the facility on the green lawn saying their goodbyes. Thor was in his usual outfit, Steve in his Cap uniform without the mask, and Tony in a t-shirt with a blazer. They had just defeated Ultron and dropped a city out of the sky. It was a stressful experience for all of the Avengers, and they lost a new comrade, but there was no time at all to rest. There were new recruits: Wanda, Falcon, War Machine, and Vision. There was a mind stone to find. There was a possible evil Bucky running around.

The problem with being a big hero is that there is always a bigger threat looming around the corner. 

Thor had just summoned the bifrost to Asgard. It burned a symbol into the brand new lawn around the facility. Tony sighed, “That man had no regard for lawn maintenance. I’m going to miss him though. And you’re going to miss me. There’s going to be a lot of manly tears.” Him and Steve were walking side by side to his fancy sports car.

Steve gave him a sincere look, “I will miss you, Tony.”  
That made Tony’s heart skip a beat. This man has such a beautiful angelic soul. “Yeah?” asked Tony, “Well, it’s time for me to tap out. Maybe I should take a page out of Barton’s book and build Pepper a farm, hope nobody...blows up.”

“The simple life.” said Steve. He figured he would go back to her. This whole fight really put things in perspective for Tony. The fear of dying and being responsible for other casualties really does make you understand what is important. He knew he and Pepper had a good thing. They always would.

“You’ll get there one day.” Tony offered, sympathetically. He knew what they had done in Clint’s house gave Steve the promise of more to come. It didn’t seem like it was ever going to happen again and that saddened Steve more than he thought it would.

Steve shrugged, “I don't know, family, stability. The guy who wanted all that went in the ice seventy-five years ago. I think someone else came out.” Tony felt guilty at that last statement. Steve was giving him that same friendly smile but his eyes were pained. He didn’t want Tony to go. They both wanted more time together. 

Tony tried not to cry and turned away to suck it up. He opened the door to his car, “You alright?” 

“I’m home.” Steve said, gesturing his head to the new agents drilling in the field over the hill from them.

Tony gave him one last look into those beautiful blue eyes and smiled. He got into his car and drove away. Steve watched him for a minute before turning to go back into the main facility.

He felt tears start to well up in his eyes and quickly wiped them away. “Stoppit. You are going to drill new agents today. Get your head in gear.” he thought to himself, slowing his stride to calm down.

Steve took a few deep breaths and came up to the large room where Natasha was waiting. He could tell she was worried about Bruce since he flew off in a jet. Fury was already trying to find him but they all were worried he wasn’t coming back this time. He made a joke about her staring at the wall to get her attention. 

“I thought you and Tony were still gazing into each other’s eyes.” she said, “How do we look?”

Steve stiffened at her comment but got her to follow him toward the hanger. “Well,” he said, handing her a tablet, “we aren’t the ‘27 Yankees.” They both agreed it was time to whip the new team into shape and took off to start training.

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- 

Time:2015, During Ant-Man (before Civil War)  
Location: Steve’s apartment, New York City

Steve was home resting up in his rather bare apartment after a long day of working out. The “new team” was going to go on their first mission soon and HE was going to be leading it. At least Natasha was always there at training and promised to be at all missions to be “assistant coach”. That made him feel more at ease.

It was about midnight. Steve still didn’t sleep much so he typically watched the classic movie channel in his bedroom until he fell asleep. All his other spare time was spent at museums and exhibits, learning all about what he missed in the world. Anything to keep his mind busy at all times.

It seemed like Natasha was his closest friend since Tony was almost never around anymore. He got really busy with his new technology he was working on. Also, he and Pepper had just bought a new house in the country that they kept inviting Steve to visit. He would lie and say he was busy, when really he just didn’t want to hang out with Pepper. What a dull woman.

Steve’s movie was interrupted when he heard a knock at his front door. He jolted up straight in his bed. His sparse bedroom was lit by only a lamp on his bedside table. He grabbed his nightstick out of his closet. Steve was on high alert because no one ever visited him at this hour. 

He snuck down the hall to the monitor in his kitchen. On it was the security camera footage of Tony Stark was standing awkwardly against the wall in his hallway. “Rogers let me in! I have to pee.” he said loudly toward the security camera.

Steve sighed and buzzed him through. Tony came in the door and ran to his bathroom, “Sorry, hold on.”

Cap put his nightstick down on the counter in his kitchen. He stood there in his underwear in his hallway awkwardly waiting for him to come out. The door the bathroom flew open. He was obviously a little drunk and giggly.

“Hey buddy!” laughed Tony, before stumbling out and embracing his shirtless torso. It caught Steve by surprise but he supported Tony’s weight as he swayed and hugged him back.

“I missed you so much.” he mumbled into Steve’s ear, “You never come to my new house for brunch. I kept hoping you would.” 

Steve pulled back from the hug but steadied his drunk friend. “I know, I’ve been busy Tony. I missed you too.” he said with a friendly tone.

Tony’s hands stayed on Steve’s hips when they pulled back. Cap pretended not to notice. 

The look in Tony’s eyes were suspicious, “See I told you we would miss each other.” he kind of slurred, “Have you been doing okay? Are you mad at me?”

“Tony, it is really late. Why are you here drunk in my apartment?” asked Steve, shaking his head.  
“I just was having a couple drinks with James and Happy. I was in the neighborhood,” he hiccuped, “so I thought I would come by and see you.” He noticed Tony was in his usual t-shirt with slacks and a blazer.

Tony was obviously checking out his shirtless chest as he held him steady. Steve blushed, “I see, well, it’s late. I would love to visit and catch up some other time when you aren’t too drunk to stand.”

“Hey,” he said, pushing Steve’s arms off and pointing a finger at him, “I am not too drunk to stand. I am just a little dizzy but I am fine.” Tony stumbled for a second, then steadied himself. 

Steve hovered his arms, ready to catch him. After he proved his point and stood up straight, he fell backwards, leaving him propped up by the butt against the wall. This emitted a disgruntled sigh from Steve.

“Alright, Tony.” he said, giving into his friend, “I was watching a movie in my room, do you want to-” “Sure!” Tony interrupted, taking off his shoes in the hallway and hurrying into Steve’s bedroom where the TV noise was coming from.

Steve rubbed the back of his neck uncomfortably and followed him. “I guess I’m babysitting Tony tonight. Don’t do anything stupid.” he thought to himself. 

Tony crawled into Steves bed under the covers and took off his blazer. He backed up all the way to sit against the headboard and threw his blazer on the floor. “What are we watching?” he asked.

Cap slowly walked toward his side of the bed while watching him, “It’s ‘Angel and the Bad Man’.”

“John Wayne! Yeah!” exclaimed Tony, getting comfy. Steve got in the bed and sat next to him. He didn’t get under the covers and crossed his arms, still looking at Tony.

Tony looked at him, “What’s been going on with you El Capitano?”

Steve shrugged, “Training James and the other guys mostly. He didn’t fill you in on that tonight?” 

“He just complained about being the older guy in the group. Jamesy can’t keep up with the young studs he works with now. I mean...I wouldn’t be complaining if I was him.” smirked Tony. Steve chuckled a little. He was always so vulgar with his head in the gutter.

“How’s Pepper?” asked Steve, not really caring. He was just trying to snap Tony back to earth. Tony nodded, “She’s good.” He showed no response and his gaze drifted back to the TV.

Steve raised an eyebrow, “Why aren’t you with her this late? Won’t she be worried about you?”

“She is in another country on business.” said Tony, finding a full water bottle in the bedside table next to him and drinking some. He put it down on the table and turned to face Steve.  
“Don’t worry about that. I asked what’s going on with you. I mean for real. How are you?” he asked, seeming to be slurring a little. Steve looked away quietly. 

Tony touched his shoulder, “Still having bad dreams?” That got Steve’s gaze back at him.

“Look,” sighed Tony, “ I missed you and James was telling me how you were and I realized we haven’t seen each other in like over 2 months. You barely even text me back, which I realize is still not a thing for you, but still. You know how to call.”

“I don’t want to bother you.” said Steve flatly.

Anthony shook his head, “You can never bother me, Steve! I’m here to talk. I can make time.”

“You have someone. I don’t want to be the nagging friend following you around all the time. I’ve been there before. My problems aren’t your problems, although I appreciate the offer.” said Steve, uncrossing his arms. 

Tony huffed, “So this is about Pepper. You won’t talk to me because I went back to her.”

Steve looked at him defensively, “You changed your mind about her almost overnight. I know this last big fight was brutal and all but-” 

“Okay, you have a point. I didn’t really handle….you and I….our thing, the best way I could have.” Tony said, “I did change my mind quickly….since Sokovia I...came up with the idea I needed to just marry Pepper because she honestly knows me and what is best for everyone. I never know if I’m going to survive a mission, let alone-”

Steve’s eyes went wide, “You’re marrying her?”

“I haven’t asked her yet! I meant like, settle down. I need to settle down with her.” said Tony, “I told you that when we were at headquarters.” He noticed the sadness in Steve’s eyes. 

After a few moments of them silently staring at each other, Steve finally spoke. “I’m happy for you, Tony. I have to admit I’m a little jealous.” he looked down at his lap, “I would love to be able to go home to someone and be normal at the end of the day.”

That broke Tony’s heart. Cap sighed, “So um…” he gave him a fake smile, “are you spending the night here or what?” “Can I? If that’s okay with you.” he replied.

“Like I have a choice? You came barging in here this late, drunk, demanding to see me.” chuckled Steve.

Tony’s smile was mischievous, “Admit it Rogers, you’re happy I’m here. Now you have someone to spoon with you tonight.” He shook his head, “Who says I am letting you sleep in here? I remember what happened last time.” 

“You don’t trust me?” asked Tony raising an eyebrow at him.

“I don’t think you would cheat on Pepper but honestly it kinda was your fault last time.” replied Steve with his friendly smile.

“Oh please! You came onto me!” he laughed, still sounding like he was a little tipsy.

“You’re the one who got excited.” Steve barked back.

“You’re the one who loomed over me asking for it.” Tony replied in his token snarky tone, but still totally flirting with him.

Steve chewed the inside of his cheek, “I guess you are right there…” That made Tony smile. “I have to admit I’ve thought about that night a lot.” he finished. Why not be honest? Would Tony even remember this conversation in the morning?

Tony’s smile dropped and there was lust in his eyes, “Me too. Mostly in the shower.” That comment earned a playful shove from Cap. “Stop, you’re so gross.” chuckled Steve.

“Seriously.” he said softly, looking back at the TV for a distraction.

Steve cleared his throat awkwardly. That made his dick perk up just a little bit. His legs crossed to hide it.

Tony was being more honest than usual, “I told you how beautiful I think you are. Ya think I was joking about that too?” he said with a flat tone, not looking away from the screen. 

He didn’t answer.

Steve didn’t understand where he was going with all this. He wondered if Tony was just trying to make him uncomfortable. He realized they shouldn’t be talking about things like that if he was back with Pepper. “Stop.” he said to Tony again.

Anthony finally looked back at him, “Stop what? Why can’t you take compliments?”

“That’s not what you are doing, Tony.” said Steve in his stern tone. 

He turned to face him completely, “What am I doing then? God, you’ve been so defensive tonight. We’re just talking.” Steve got a little annoyed, “You know you are trying to get me all hot and bothered so I just…let you get your rocks off. You have to know I’ve been alone most of the time. That’s not fair. I’m not letting it happen. You have someone already and, call me old if you want, but I think relationships should be respected.”

“Get my rocks off, huh?” asked Tony.  
“C’mon is that all you heard?” Steve scoffed.  
“Listen…” Tony said, kind of slurring, “not that it matters, but Pepper and I have an understanding. I’m allowed to hook up with other people….as long as they aren’t women. Also I have to be safe obviously.”

Steve gave him a look of disbelief. Tony threw his hands up, “I’m being for real! We just don’t talk about it after. She doesn’t care to know details. It was the only thing I could get her to compromise on when we got back together. She knows how I am and like I said, she knows what is best for everyone.” His tipsy tone made him sound a little like a pissed off teenage girl. 

They sat there, listening to the movie for a few minutes. 

Steve kept opening and closing his mouth like he was going to say something. He wasn’t completely sure if Tony was just saying whatever he could to hook up again. Even if Pepper was okay with it, Steve wasn’t really sure if he could be. It seemed like a really weird arrangement to him, but he heard from Sam all the time about how strange relationships had become recently.

People dated without meeting in person, people date in groups of three...anything goes now! 

During Steve’s deep thoughts, he started to notice Tony’s hazy eyes were roaming all over his body. He realized he was sitting on top of the blanket wearing nothing but his boxer briefs. That is what ultimately got them in a compromising position last time. 

He knew he was a “stud”. That is the one power Steve never used to his advantage, the power of being literal human perfection. He wanted to use it, he just couldn’t be the “run around floozy” type his mother always warned him about when he was a boy. 

Steve’s needs were getting to him though, also the emotional attachment he had with Tony made doing sexual things with him almost second nature. He wasn’t sure if it would be as easy with anyone else.

Tony looked at his watch, then back at Steve, “It’s pretty late. I can just go make myself comfy on the couch if you want me to.” 

Steve’s got a pain in his stomach. He knew what he wanted but couldn’t get the courage to take it. 

After a few minutes, Tony still didn’t get a response. He sighed, “Okay then...whatever, Rogers. Goodnight.” with that, he started to get out of bed.

“You’re Captain America. You run into burning buildings. You always wait too long to make a move, just do something!” he thought to himself.

Steve’s heart pounded out of his chest as he jolted toward Tony and yanked on his shoulders, causing him to fall onto his back on the bed. Tony squeaked in surprise but had a smile on his face.

Steve leaned down and kissed him forwardly. He still tasted like scotch. When he pulled back, Tony scooted backwards and sat up, “So-” “Shh” said Steve, touching two fingers to his lips, “You need to stop talking.”

He kissed Stark again, pulling off his t-shirt quickly, touching his toned chest. Tony encircled his arms around his neck and their tongues rubbed together. They both moaned and panted.

Steve was lying on top of him, supporting his weight on one arm, positioned between Tony’s legs. Their cocks rubbed together through clothes. Tony took one hand down to grab on his ass and push it down so they grinding harder on each other. Oh that ass was so firm and round and beautiful! 

After a mess of making out and removing clothes, Tony finally whispered in his ear, “Mmm...fuck me.”

It sounded so harsh and dirty to Steve ears, yet it excited him even more. He sat back on his knees a little to look down at Tony, “How do I…” With a smirk, Anthony reached over to his blazer pocket where he always kept lube and a pack of condoms. 

He walked Steve through the start up process and eventually was thrusting, slowly and deeply, into Tony. 

Steve’s eyes were squeezed shut as he felt the greatest pleasure waves he had ever felt. Anthony’s moans were deep and ragged with every thrust. He grabbed Steve’s neck to pull him down for wet and sloppy kisses. Steve was being fierce but very gentle.

“You can go harder if you want.” whispered Anthony breathlessly. 

“I don’t want to hurt you.” said Steve.

“I can take it a lot rougher, Rogers, trust me.” he said, biting on his neck a little.

Steve groaned at how good the love bites felt and began fucking him harder and faster. Tony’s back arched as he hit his spot, taking everything in his power not to scream.

It didn’t take long before Steve felt a tightness in his lower stomach. 

Tony started to whimper and they both came at the same time. Steve slowly pulled out and collapsed next to him to catch his breath.

“Shit.” breathed Steve. Tony gasped with a smile, “Did you just say-”

“Shut up.” Steve cut him off with a kiss before he could mock him again about his feelings on profanity.

“But I need a towel.” Anthony told him when he pulled back. He motioned his head down to his cum covered torso. Steve went to the laundry basket in his closet to grab a towel to wipe them both off. He also threw away the “evidence” in the bathroom.

Tony was lying naked across the whole bed on his stomach when he came back in the room. He was resting his chin on his arms and smiling lazily up at Cap.

Steve admired his bare ass as he slipped his underwear back on and passed Tony his. Reluctantly, Tony put his underwear on. Cap sat at the edge of the bed with his elbows resting on his knees. He was still breathing kind of hard, trying to calm down. 

He felt Tony slide around and hug him from behind. His chin on Steve’s shoulder, he said, “That was really hot. You’re...just so amazing.” 

Steve laughed and shook his head, “I’m surprised to hear that. I haven’t done it since the 40s”

“You’re kidding!” exclaimed Tony. “I mean...I was in ice for 70 years.” he said.

Tony hands gently rested on Steve’s abs, “Fair enough. I guess you never done anal before either.” 

That made Steve’s entire head blush, “Nope.” he said through gritted teeth. 

“If you are going to do things, you have to be able to talk about them, Stevie. I know you are old fashioned but you can’t be a prude about everything.” giggled Tony.

“Hey maybe I’m not a prude, alright? I just am getting used to everything still. These new feelings and...experiences. It’s a new thing for me within the new world I am already adjusting to.” Steve said softly. He looked over at Tony, who still had his head on his shoulder, admiring his face with a smile.

“What?” asked Steve, since he was staring. 

“Nothing, you are just from a different time, and sometimes when you get confused or embarrassed...it’s cute, that’s all.” said Tony, who was finally starting to sober up.

“Cute?!” laughed Steve. “Yes! You are so inexperienced. I also...like being the one you have those learning experiences with. I am here to teach, if you want to keep learning.” he said with a raised eyebrow. Steve’s look turned to intrigue then exhaustion. Tony suggested they lay down to sleep.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was my attempt at writing a mission! Smut is in there too of course, but there are more feelings to come.

Chapter 3

Time: still before Civil War  
Location: a Mission in Boston

The “new recruits” plus Iron Man, Widow, and Cap (minus Iron Patriot and Vision) were on a mission responding to a rogue mutant that had ice powers. He had iced half of a neighborhood near Boston commons, a large park. The mutant was a scrawny teenage boy with black hair. He was walking around causing mayhem while people were running trying to evacuate where the police advised them.

The team was spread throughout the city to do damage control since the integrity of most of the buildings and trees had been compromised. The mutant was furious. He was shooting every person with ice and freezing them solid if they came near him. After a few cops were frozen in place, one examination by the team determined you can’t really stay alive for that long once you get blasted.

“I got a lock on the ice teen.” Tony said into the communicator to the team. He was watching him walk toward the Hatch Memorial Shell, an open air concert venue. Police helicopters were hovering over him too but were shot down by the kid’s ice blasts. Wanda came running down the main road to catch the copters as they fell to get the cops out safely.

“You would think these cops would understand that they are of no use anymore.” said Natasha over the communicator. She was flying a mile away in the Avenger plane.

Falcon was flying around the water, waiting for instruction. Captain America was running through the frozen citizens in the surrounding neighborhoods literally punching and throwing his shield to break the ice cubes they were covered in. “Somebody should have told this kid there are no ice storms in the summer.” Captain grunted over the radio. He only needed to get the top half of them so they could do the rest. 

“I got a plan.” said Tony, flying near the kid in his suit but avoiding every ice blast that was thrown at him. “Let’s hear it.” Falcon responded via communicator.

“Wanda, I will blast the kid and propel him into that shell theater. Then when he is caught off guard you will pick him up and blast him into the water. Then Sam, when he surfaces, slap those antifreeze handcuffs on him. Cool?” Tony said, laughing at the pun.

“Got it.” said Wanda and Sam simultaneously.

Tony swooped down and came face to face with the ice kid. “Hey buddy.” He said casually.

The kid blasted ice on his suit, which the suit broke through immediately. The mutant kept trying and trying, but realized it was useless. “Stop there or I will kill you all.” he threatened.

“See, that type of attitude will never get you into the X-men.” Tony retorted, earning a few more blasts to the limbs. Iron Man broke through the ice once more and lifted his hand blasters. When the mutant kid lifted his ice hands to defend himself, he blasted him into the half shell theater.

The kid flew and skidded to a halt on the stage. Wanda was ready at the water’s edge and lifted the kid to throw him into the water. He resurfaced, gasping for breath, and Sam swooped down to cuff him and lift him out onto his feet on the dock. The Feds and their special movers unit were already ready for him on the main road. 

“Go team!” said Natasha, watching the whole thing from the sky.

The rest of them on the ground, met up next to the Fed’s van. The commissioner of mutant affairs came over to them, he was an old white guy with white hair and a bullet proof suit, “Thank you so much, Avengers.” He shook their hands one by one, “The city of Boston thanks you as well.”

“Any casualties?” asked Cap. The commissioner looked positive, “We had 3. They were men in blue. It is unfortunate but a thousand times better than we thought. There were no civilians. Your team made a true difference. Well done.”

Natasha landing the jet next to them and they all got in to go back to headquarters. 

When they arrived in the building, They all began to take off their various armor and started to the locker rooms. 

Sam, Steve, and Tony were talking about the mission as they changed into casual clothes.

“I’m just saying,” said Tony, putting on his graphic T-shirt, “if the kid is a troubled mutant we shouldn’t have got that call. It should have been the X-men.”

Sam laughed while lacing up his shoes, “You can’t just say, ‘Oh mutant mission, that's boring...don’t want it.’ We are on supposed to help the helpless. Now that kid can get help.”

“I have to agree with you, Sam.” Steve said. He was pulling on his jeans but was shirtless and he still had his mask on. 

“What if he already tried to join the X-men?” Sam asked, looking at them both while sitting on a bench, “What if he was pissed off because they rejected him?” 

“Why do you think they’d do that? He’s too cold hearted maybe?” said Tony with a smile. 

They all three laughed. Sam shook his head, “That was a good mission though. I’m glad to get something simple. It was good to fight with you for a change too, Tony.” He stood up and grabbed his backpack over his shoulder, “I am going to get going. I’m supposed to meet Scott Lang today.”

“Oh right, the guy with the bugs.” said Tony. 

“Ant-Man?” asked Steve, “I thought you had trouble finding him.”

“Turns out that once you are a convict, your information is pretty much public record. Also I asked an agent for help.” said Sam, starting toward the door. “Another man on the team,” Tony sighed, “just for once I would like their name to not have man in it. Is there anything wrong with an Ant-Guy or even an Ant-Dude?”

“See you guys later. I will be in sunny California.” Sam said loudly as he exited.

Cap was looking at his phone, trying to reply to all his messages but the damn thing still barely made sense to him. Tony sat on the bench facing him. They were between long rows of lockers.

“Were you happy with our work today?” he asked Steve, eyes looming over his body.

Steve’s eyes switched to Tony, “Yeah we did fine. That was a good plan you had. I’m happy.” His tone was really flat.

“You sure don’t seem happy.” Tony said, cocking his head a little. Steve set his phone in his locker, “Well, you know I would prefer to have no casualties at all...we still had 3.”

“The bright side is that we were not responsible for those casualties. It was that crazy ice dude. Try seeing the positive.” said Tony.

Steve put his hands on his hips and nodded, “I guess so.” “You don’t have to guess about anything.” said Tony, standing and slipping his arms around his waist. His eyes focused on Steve’s lips. 

“Tony…” Steve whispered warningly, looking over his shoulder for possible witnesses. 

“You heard the commissioner, we made a difference today. You don’t need to doubt us so much, or yourself. We did great...you did great.” he told Steve in a loving tone.

Steve smiled weakly at him then his eyes fluttered shut as he was kissed gently on the lips.

“Even though I would never admit it in front of the team, you know you are the true leader of the Avengers. I know I provide the money for all this but you really do provide the leadership.” said Tony, hugging him closer.

That brought a true bright smile to Steve’s face, “You just like to tell me what I want to hear.”

“Hey…”said Tony sternly, cupping the back of his neck, “What have I told you before? Stop making excuses why you don’t deserve to be admired. You do.”  
That warmed Steve’s heart. He got flushed for a minute. Tony’s face moved in again to kiss him a few times. Steve reached up to unzip his mask. “No.” said Anthony softly, lifting his hands to stop him, “Keep it on.”

Now Steve’s heart was starting to race. The way Tony’s hands were slowing sliding down his chest was giving him that paralyzed excited feeling as usual. “What about the girls?” whispered Steve, watching his hands, “Won’t they come looking for us to say goodbye?”

“I sent Nat a text, telling her we had dinner plans.” breathed Tony before reaching down Steve’s pants and taking his mouth in more deep kisses. “We do?” smiled Steve between kisses. He was pushed against the wall of closed lockers. The cold metal against his bare skin made him hiss.

“Sorry,” murmured Tony against his mouth, “but yeah we can get dinner after.”

“After?” Steve jokingly played dumb, which earned him a bite on the neck. He yelped in surprise then moaned when Tony did it again a little harder.

They had been hooking up semi-regularly for the past couple months. Usually it was after missions because that meant that Pepper wouldn’t be around. Tony was mostly the one who instigated.

Steve felt Tony’s hand speed up in his pants around his cock. It was so hard it was rigid like steel. He could barely catch his breath. Tony was kissing him deeply with his own boner digging into Steve’s hip.

He pulled back to whisper to Steve, “I need you to do something for me.”

Steve’s eyes were squeezed shut, “Ugh, anything.” “Suck my cock.” moaned Tony, with a thrust of his own hips.

Steve opened his eyes and looked at him worried, “I...don’t know if I can-” “Please,I trust you. I’m not judging your skill.” he said softly, pecking his lips and taking his hand out of Steve’s pants. Tony sat down on the bench in front of him and undid his pants.

“What if I gag?” asked Steve. “Most people do.” laughed Tony.

Steve kneeled slowly in front of him. He insecurely pulled out Tony’s dick and leaned forward. Looking up at Tony, he sighed, “Do I still have to keep the mask on?”

“Yes.” breathed Tony, he thrust his cock forward which surprised Steve but he took it in his mouth. Anthony coached him through it. Steve’s head began bobbing up and down slowly as he closed his eyes to concentrate.

“That’s it…” groaned Tony, “mmm you’re doing great.” His dick hit the back of Steve’s throat which caused him to gag a little.  
Steve pulled back and caught his breath, “Tell me when you-” He was cut off with Tony shoving himself back in his mouth. 

“Shh, keep going.” whispered Tony, thrusting quickly and raggedly. He looked down at the masked man with his eyes closed with a dirty smile. 

The visual of getting Captain America to suck him off was really making him hot. Tony felt his climax approaching. Steve was way better at blowjobs than he thought he would be. He tapped him on the shoulder so Steve knew to pull back and released all over his own chest.

Immediately, Steve grabbed a towel from his locker and wiped him off. Tony could help but pout sweetly at him. He was so damn considerate. 

Steve took his mask off finally and found that his hair was all matted. He was sweaty too. “I’m going to need to get a shower now.” he said, turning to go to the showers. Tony caught him by the waist, “Hey.”

“What?” laughed Steve. Tony cradling him like that always made him flushed and red. No one else touched him like that in his life. Even though Tony had been doing it for a few months, he still wasn’t used to it. 

They looked at each other for a minute. “I want to uh….come watch.” suggested Tony, kissing his shoulder.

Steve rolled his eyes, “Seriously?” “Yes.” Tony smiled. 

“You’re such a pervert, Tony.” he laughed.

“I mean, I just want to see if anything good happens. I mean I didn’t get you to-”

“Alright, whatever.” laughed Steve, unwrapping himself from his arms and heading to grab a towel.

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

That night Steve had a vivid dream.

He was in his army uniform. It was the 1940s again, which was reflected by a radio playing music from that era. He looked around and realized he was in the living room of a little apartment that looked really familiar. There were pictures of his family all over the walls.

him, causing him to turn around. 

Bucky Barnes, who was also in his army uniform, was standing there with a small smile. His hat was in his hands and he fiddled with it, “Hey kid, you ready to go?”

Steve’s tears felt real as they flooded his eyes. “Buck?” he asked.

Bucky was concerned, “Steve, are you okay?” Steve dropped his head and wiped his eyes, “You’re not real.”

Bucky came over to wrap his arms around Steve, “Yes, I am. I’m here. I love you.” He leaned in slowly to kiss him.

“Stop!” yelled Steve, pushing him hard against the wall. Bucky turned away for a second to catch himself on the wall and stand up. When he turned back to him he suddenly had dark black circles around his eyes. His hair was longer, he was angry, he was yelling and throwing punches.

Cap deflected the punches, he was hit down to his back on the ground. Bucky straddled him and continued to punch him in the face, “You told me to finish my mission!” he screamed.

Steve suddenly woke up in his bed in a cold sweat. His blankets were kicked off the bed. The bedroom was only lit by the glow of the TCM channel on TV left muted. He sat up.

His hands covered his face and he cried a little for a few minutes. When he pulled himself together, he went to the bathroom to wash his face. After he rinsed, he looked up at himself. 

Steve didn’t know what to make of his nightmare. He had been sleeping a little better the past few weeks but still had a bad night quite often. Was this PTSD? Could he possibly see someone and be diagnosed? Would he even be able to take medication since his body burns through everything?

He shook his head of his negative thoughts and started to do pull ups on his bar in his bathroom doorway.

Working out always helped clear his head and get ready to get back to sleep. In the middle of his reps he had flashes of his dream and dropped to his feet. What did it mean?

He sat up straight in his bed, staring at the muted movie on TV. He needed to get out his inner turmoil somehow, so he grabbed his sketchbook and a pencil out of his bedside table. Steve was going to sketch out his dream. He sketched in detail until he dozed off a few hours later, book in hand, pencil dropped on the ground. 

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next morning Tony came to Steve’s apartment. He was sleeping through his texts and phone calls. 

They were supposed to go train with the new team. Tony knocked on his door. There was no answer. He opened a hidden keyboard on the wall and entered an override code to let himself in.

Tony was worried since Steve was punctual to everything. He came in the apartment slowly and cautiously, looking around. His place could have been sacked overnight. You could never be sure what to expect when you were an Avenger. 

Tony sighed when he came into Steve's bedroom and found that he was fine, just sleeping like a baby. 

This wasn’t like him. He couldn't recall Cap sleeping through anything. 

Considering waking him up, Tony paused. He noticed the sketchbook open on top of his chest. Carefully, like a crime scene agent, Tony lifted the black soft cover book to look at it.

The pages that were immediately open were marked with sketches of a handsome young man in an old Army uniform. He smiled and admired the detail of Steve's drawings.

The next page was of that same man but with a metal arm and a dark mask with long hair. He was staring long and hard at the metal armed man sketch when he realized who it was. 

Cap had described Bucky before but he had never truly seen him. As he kept flipping through the sketchbook he noticed some drawings of himself, some of them close up on Tony’s face, some of them of Tony's whole Iron Man ensemble with his smiling face exposed.

Steve stirred in his sleep. Tony jumped and remembered why he was there suddenly. He put the book on the bedside table then gently stroked Steve's cheek.

“Oh, Rogers?” He said gingerly. 

Steve quit his snoring but didn't open his eyes. “Wake up Captain” said Tony close to his ear.

Steve stirred awake and quickly jumped when he noticed Tony, “Oh no, why are you here?”

“Most people would just say good morning.” Laughed Tony.

“Am I late?!” Steve exclaimed.

“No. Not at all. I told you we could ride together to training but you weren't picking up so I let myself in. I was worried about you. Also I want to take you to breakfast.” Tony told him, cocking his head and smiling. 

Steve rubbed his eyes and stretched, making his rippled chest flex. Tony tried to look around in his bedroom to focus on something else. He noticed Steve had begun decorating his apartment a little.  
There were a few things in frames on the walls now! Tony ventured over to a framed plaque with an old picture of his squad in the war. There were a few old pictures of him and Bucky from the war as well as Peggy Carter. 

Tony realized how great of an artist he truly was, his detail was absolutely perfect. The picture was of Steve and Bucky smiling at each other. He could see why Steve was so infatuated by him. Bucky Barnes was a pretty handsome guy.

Steve sleepily looked through his messages on his phone, “Oh you called so many times.” he said behind him, ‘ I’m really sorry, Tony. It won’t happen again. I just didn’t sleep well.”

Tony continued to examine his framed pictures with his back to him. “Why didn’t you sleep?” he asked.

Steve sighed, “Ya know...the usual. Bad dreams. Plus the news has nothing good to say about us. They are still talk about Soko-” Tony turned to him suddenly, “Hey what did I say about the news?”

That shut Steve up. Anthony had warned him that the press was always out to blame someone for everything and almost always told fabricated stories for viewers.

“I know. It’s nice to know what’s going on though. I usually feel like I am in the dark and information travels so fast now.” said Steve innocently.

Tony gave him a sympathetic look, “Well, how about we get that breakfast huh? I know a great place down the street.” Steve agreed and got up to get dressed. They took Tony’s sports car down to a cafe a few blocks away. It had high booths so people wouldn’t recognize them.

Steve wore a baseball cap and activewear. Tony wore his activewear with sunglasses.

After they ordered their food with the waitress, the heroes began discussing training techniques for the team later.

Tony was sipping his coffee saying, “You can’t make them fight dummies forever. We have to start sparring together more.” 

“Right so who knows how to spar? Natasha and…..Natasha.” said Steve.

“So what? She can teach us an-” Tony stopped talking when a random 30 year old man in a black suit and tie came up to their table. He had long hair slicked back into a bun and was clean shaven.

“Sorry didn’t mean to interrupt.” the man said.

Tony fake smiled at him, “Not a problem. What can I do for you, Sir?”

The man smiled, “Well, I thought I noticed you two outside and I really just wanted to come meet THE Captain America and Iron Man. Wow! This is crazy.” His words left his mouth so snide and emotionless. 

Steve exchanged looks of confusion with Tony. 

“Oh! Sorry you asked what you can do for me, right?” said the Man, pulling out a folded newspaper isolated on a specific circled obituary. “Here.” he said, slamming it on the table.

The obituary was for a young woman in her 20s who died in Sokovia during the Ultron attack.

“I want a signature from the great heroes right here on my sister’s obituary. Her funeral is today. You two dropped that city. Then the dust from the drop blew through her hotel like a thousand tornadoes. You did that, so congratulations. I don’t know if you care about anyone but yourselves, but I am actually on the way to the funeral now.” the Man said through his teeth, leaning into their booth.

Steve’s expression was worried, “I’m so sorry to hear that. Look we-”

“Shut up, Steve.” said Tony, which earned him an angry look. Anthony stood and faced the man, “How much was your sister’s funeral expenses?”

The man scoffed, “You can’t silence me with some money-” “How….much?” demanded Tony.

The man named the price and Tony immediately pulled that much out of his wallet in cash and put it in his hand. He looked down at the stack of money in his hand then back up at him, unsure of what to do.

Tony patted him on the back, “Look, I know losing someone close to you is the greatest pain and I pray for you and your family to heal. I’m so sorry we couldn’t save her but I hope this helps with the bills, Pal.”

The man didn’t respond. He just started to cry and left the cafe.

Steve stared at Tony, “What was that?” Anthony sat back down across from him in the booth, “What was what?”

“You can’t give cash to everyone who has something mean to say to us. They don’t know what we had to do to fight all those robots and save as many as we could.” said Steve.

Tony shook his head, “We are still responsible for things like you said. You always feel overly responsible, remember? You just got to do whatever you can to help in situations like his.” he pointed toward the door. 

“I’m trying to do this new thing were I see the big picture instead of dwelling on things. He is dwelling because of grief but he came over here to take it out on us. That’s not right.” Steve argued.

“People dying isn’t right either.” said Tony. Steve didn’t say anything, he just looked down.

Their food was put in front of them by their waitress. 

Tony picked up his fork and started to eat his omelet. He noticed Steve was still staring at his lap. “What’s wrong?” he asked Cap.

“Suddenly I am not hungry.” Steve said.

After Tony ate, they went to the compound in the country to meet up with the team. When they arrived, everyone was pacing in the great empty room in the front. Everyone except Wanda. They were all wearing their normal fighting gear.

Everyone looked up at Steve and Tony when they walked in but said nothing. 

Tony, who was in his casual clothes, scanned the room and said, “What happened?” Natasha slowly came up to them and spoke softly, “Wanda had a little episode earlier. She lost control of her power and caused an explosion. Two new interns were burned.”

Steve leaned toward her, “Are they alright?”

“Yes, they will need some skin repair on their arms but they will be fine. She is just really upset with herself now and she has locked herself in living quarters. She keeps telling us if we go in there she is just going to hurt us.” she told them.

Vision came over to them, “Excuse me but I believe she tends to trust Steve, right? Why doesn’t he go in there and talk to her? Also you heal rather quickly if she tries anything. Tell her she isn’t a monster.”

Steve nodded and slid on his mask, “I guess I can do that.” 

Tony looked after him worriedly as he slowly approached the hallway to the living quarters. The team all waited in silence with their fingers crossed. Steve got to the door and scanned his face to gain entry.

The main room in the living quarters wasn’t damaged, it was just empty because Wanda had moved all the furniture against the walls stacked up. She was sitting alone in her black sweatsuit in the middle of the empty room, crying. Her hood was drawn over her face as she stared down at her palms.

Steve approached her slow and cautious, “Wanda?” he said softly. 

She looked up at him while sobbing, “What!” she groaned.  
He stopped a few feet from her and put his hands up, “It’s just me. I heard you had a bad day today. Look, you don’t have to train for the rest of the week or ever again if you don’t want to. We want to keep you here just for your safety. It’s all for you and what you want, as long as you are safe.” 

Wanda stared up at him, “Why does everyone say that? Like I’m so fragile? You want to say you are concerned for everyone else. None of you tell me the truth because you don’t want to hurt my fucking feelings.” her curses sounded harsher in her heavy accent.

Steve squatted down to be eye level with her, “I understand what you are going through. You miss your brother. I know how you feel, Wanda. I felt like a ball of rage and sadness after I lost my best friend during a mission. It’s okay to admit when you aren’t okay with how the world is turning around you. Sometimes you have to also admit when you need help.” 

He sat down closer to her on the floor so they were face to face.

Wanda considered what he said for a moment, “Your Bucky. I remember.” she sighed. He felt a twinge in his stomach when she acknowledged him aloud. “I’m sorry for that vision I gave you before I trusted you, Steven. I feel so remorsefully sad, it’s all falling on me at once and my Pietro….is…” she paused to hold back a sob, “gone from me forever. I feel even worse now for preying on others during their times like this.”

Steve shook his head slowly, “Don’t worry about me and you. I trust you too, Wanda and I am your friend. Those guys out there are your friends. We know you had an accident today but everything is okay. You just need some time to yourself.”

“I can’t leave this room. I’m going to kill someone if I get upset.” Wanda said, rolling her eyes.

“Those interns are not dead, they will be okay. The team just wants to know you are okay too. Then you can do whatever you want while we have training. Would that be alright?” he asked, flashing her a small friendly smile.

Wanda stared at him for a minute then finally answered, “So I just need to tell them I am alright then I can stay here?”

“Yes, exactly.” Steve said, “Well, if you could move the furniture back that would also be helpful.” He said jokingly.

Wanda laughed a little, and looked down at her lap. The furniture began levitating around them back to the right places. She sniffed and wiped her eyes. Steve stood up and held out a hand for her, “Thanks.”

Wanda took his hand and stood up to follow him out to the hallway.

More than one instance after that, Wanda had a few bad days at the compound. She would get upset and things around the property would begin to levitate. She never wanted to talk to anyone but Steve and Vision. 

Eventually, Steve got tired of commuting back and forth so he officially moved into the Avenger’s upstate compound with the rest of the team. He and Wanda became very close friends and he even would do one on one training sessions with her until she trusted herself around others again.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> There is some spilling of beans and other substances.

Chapter 4  
Time: A week before the Lagos mission (beginning of Civil War)

 

It was night, a few months into Steve living in headquarters. Tony had been coming around to be with him “privately” a lot less since he moved in. There were more cameras and witnesses. There was less privacy since Vision could walk through walls. 

Everyone berated him enough to almost break Vision of the habit.

Steve was doing push-ups alone in his “dorm”. His door was set to “do not disturb” so no one could barge in. He heard a knock. “It’s me.” Tony said.

Steve got up from his position and pressed the button to open up. Tony smiled at the shirtless Captain in front of him and licked his lips, “Mm, hello gorgeous.”

“Hush! Get in here.” blushed Steve.

Tony giggled and went to sit on his bed, “Hey Capitano, wonder why it’s so quiet in here? Everyone’s gone. Natasha took them to dinner at Clint’s country barn.” He laughed at the fact that it sounded like a buffet kitchen chain.

“Is that where the jet took off to? Why didn’t they invite me?” asked Steve, locking the door anyway. 

“Natasha asked me first and I said you and I had plans already. I needed some time alone with you. I missed you.” He said, batting his eyelashes and smiling innocently.

Steve chuckled and moved to sit next to him, “I hadn’t heard from you as much lately. I figured it was because I live here now. Not so close and convenient.” 

Tony put his arms around his hips, “Well, partly that is true. You have 4 roomates now. That makes it more likely to be exposed. I know you want to keep your private life private.” He laid his head on Steve’s shoulder.

Steve sighed, “What’s the other part? Busy with Pepper?” 

“I’m not with Pepper anymore, actually….but...yeah you could say that bitch is still keeping me busy.” Tony blurted out.

Steve pushed him to sit back up straight, “What? Again? Seriously? Why now?”

Tony stared into his eyes, so full of emotion, “Which question do you want me to answer first?”

“Are you okay?” asked Steve, touching his cheek. He pushed his head more into Steve’s palm.

“What happened?” he asked Tony softly.

Tony kissed his palm, then took that hand in his, “Oh ya know….same Tony, same problems, different day. She wants to make a life and slow down and I can’t. I won’t slow down.” He sighed, “She has expected all this extra work out of me since we got back together and I’m just not that guy. Not right now. I’m slowing her down, her….plan or whatever. As of late, I’ve been moving her things out of our new country home….that I will never get resold for the same price…” Tony shook his head, “I moved back into the penthouse officially.” He looked down at their hands, “It’s too inconvenient for her to love me anymore. I don’t know if I can convince her to keep trying to.” 

Tony held both his hands lovingly and softly, “I missed you so much and every time I would try and come and see you I had more bullshit calls from her to deal with or the team had you running training all the time…. ”

Steve’s heart ached for him, however he felt kind of relieved. He knew she knew about Tony’s fucking around but could that have maybe been what broke them up? His promiscuity? Their promiscuity? He felt guilty for sneaking around even though it felt so good he almost could ignore the guilt by now.

“Was….” Steve struggled to find the words as he looked Tony over, “Did you and I make things…”

Tony looked back up at him, “No! Not at all, hun. Pepper and I have our deep rooted problems because of me. It’s just a never ending cycle with me and her. You are different. You are special to me and I love…” he paused. Steve’s eyes widened. 

Tony backtracked, “I love….how you are my best friend and I can trust you.” He said, patting his hand and laughing uncomfortably. “You...get me.” They both knew what he almost said. 

Steve raised an eyebrow.

Tony chuckled nervously, “Look, um….everything is so up in the air right now. I know things are weird around here and the climate lately around us isn’t great. I know things are still fresh with Pepper, and I can totally wait. Don’t feel obligated to say yes...or no...but….would you want to, uh…” 

Steve was trying to urge him to the point but he paused out of fear.

“Spit it out, Tony. You know you can’t really offend me at this point.” he laughed.

“Be with….me?”he finally spit out. “Fuck that was stupid.” Tony thought to himself, “I’m a grown fucking man with a super suit and a goddamn empire.” His heart raced in the silence.

“Tony,” Steve smiled, “I haven’t even seen you in 2 weeks. Then you drop this on me?”

Tony adjusted himself to be on his knees completely facing him, “Hey, I’m sorry. I was just trying to get all this bullshit situated and done. I still have been checking in with you every other day. As much as I could. At least I gave you good morning texts. I had to move around, I told you. I don’t want to ever let that happen again! I want to be with you for real, Steve. I want to be honest with the team about it and eventually...move in together.” 

Steve’s expression softened to a slight shocked but understanding look. He was speechless. A gay avengers relationship, with a well-known sleazy kind of guy like Anthony Stark? What would Peggy say when she reads in the paper? What would Nick Fury say at the next check in? It would be madness.

When there was still no reply from Steve, Tony held his broad shoulders lovingly, “If you want to still keep it private, I understand too. We can move to another country and quit this whole crime fighting bullshit, I don’t care. I just want to give to you what you have effortlessly given to me. I couldn’t stop thinking about you when I was away. I know we never established what this is or how long it would go on, but I’ve thought this through. I want to take care of you and I want to belong to each other.”

That brought a deep blush over Steve. His heart was pounding in his ears. “T-Tony….this is still a new area for me. I don’t know if...I’m a….I’m not even sure what to call it. It’s a lot to put on me while I’m trying to do all these things for the team and I just moved in here for Wanda and Vision. I’m trying to be more present for them. Like you said, with all the bad press and the constant harassment we get….It’s not a good time to be...Hell, I don’t know-”

“It’s called coming out.” Tony offered.

“What?” he snapped his head at him in confusion.

“Oh, it’s technically called coming out of the closet. When you tell everyone you are a….your sexual preference. As you were.” said Tony, letting go of his shoulders.

Steve ran a hand through his hair, “I see...well, yeah it’s not a good time to be coming out of any closets. I’m just trying to keep the walls up around me, do you understand?”

Tony nodded, his eyes becoming glossy. He wiped the tears away. He was never very good at hiding that from Steve.

Steve sighed, “Come here.” Tony leaned forward and embraced him. Tony was in jeans and a tshirt but he felt every muscle in Cap’s chest when they embraced tightly. Cap pulled him into his lap.

He had never done that before. Tony willed himself to stop crying. “Tony…” he whispered deep in his chest, still embracing him, “I love you too.”

Tony went to pull back but Steve held him too tight.

“Just let me say this.” said Steve, making Tony relax into him.

“I know that’s how you feel and I feel that way too. I just….don’t know what that love really means. I don’t know who I am inside yet. I always feel like a part of me is missing. Maybe I’m getting used to this century or feeling this kind of connection is too strange, I’m not sure. There are all these scary forces out there and….I don’t want you to be involved with me seriously. It’s too dangerous. I have to say I feel better about us and...what we do, since we aren’t seeing anyone else. I want to be with you...but when would it ever be a good time for us when there is always that evil out there for our blood, right?”

Tony wrapped his arms around Steve’s neck and nodded against his face. He managed to suck up his tears. Steve’s hands rubbed up and down his back, “You’re so good to me, Tony. I don’t want to put you through more heartache. Not now.”

“By evil out for our blood, did you mean Pepper?” asked Tony softly.

“Tony, stop joking for five seconds.” Steve said, stifling a laugh. “Be honest.” he smiled. “Okay, maybe a little.” Steve admitted.

Tony laughed, “You are so worried about me. What about you, huh? You never want to let yourself have anything.”

Steve pulled him back to look at him, “You aren’t upset with me?”

“No, of course not.” said Tony, furrowing his brow and sliding out of his lap.

“Ofcourse I get worried Tony, you look a mess. I can see how Pepper has broken you down. I don’t like seeing you this way. I don’t want to be the cause of any pain for you either.” Steve’s face became that stern boy scout look he gave citizens in trouble.

“No, no sweet boy.” Tony shook his head, “I told you I can wait and you don’t have to feel obligated to give me any answer or anything.” He hooked a gentle hand around Steve’s firm neck and admired his face, “I enjoy your company whether we are complicated or not. We don’t have to be anything you aren’t ready for. Maybe I’m not even ready, I just think I am.”

Steve nodded and moaned a little as Tony eventually was massaging his neck.

“And I’m not broken down, I’m just getting on with my life.” said Tony.

“Are we going to...keep…” Steve started to say tentatively. “Seeing each other?” Tony said at the same time.

“Yeah.” said Steve awkwardly, eyes shifting away. “I don’t see why not.” Tony replied, smiling.

Tony leaned forward and started to kiss him in the feverish way he always did, but Steve slowed him down with a hand to the chest. He cupped his face and took control, kissing him slow and intimately. .

Tony let him take over out of curiosity and was not disappointed. There had never been such passion pouring out of him before. Steve was encircling him with his arms and twisting his head to kiss him in all different angles.

It was really hot, he couldn’t help but get excited. When they stopped kissing they pulled back and were both panting slightly. 

“Wow.” breathed Tony, “Where you been hiding that?”

Cap held his arms around Tony’s waist, “What do you mean?” he breathed, looking down at those puffy red lips and that goatee. 

Steve laid him onto his back and kissed him with sweet dominance once more, “God,” he breathed between kisses, “you taste so good.”

Tony pushed back from him long enough to slip off his t-shirt so they were both topless. “Mmm” he moaned at Steve, “Why don’t you get those pants off so I can taste you?”

Steve looked down at his athletic pants and quickly began taking them off with one hand. When he was naked, Tony flipped them over so he was on top and began kissing down his chest, licking and biting in random spots. His chest was just too beautiful. Tony just loved touching it.

“I…” Steve stuttered, “think I want to try something finally.” He gasped when he felt a pair of lips graze his balls. Tony’s head popped up, “Hmm?”

Breathlessly he said, “I want you to fuck me, Tony.” 

Tony seemed kind of confused, sitting back on his knees with Steve’s cock in his hand. Steve looked down at him with half lidded eyes, “Fuck me…..like I fuck you.”

That made Tony’s whole body tingle and warmth spread throughout him. He finally understood what he meant and pulled a tube of lubricant out of his pocket. 

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next morning at about 5:00 a.m. Steve woke up from his phone going off. He rolled toward his bed side table and groaned at the hour. It was still not completely daylight outside yet.

Steve looked behind him and noticed Tony was actually still there and sleeping. He answered his phone, it was Sam. “Cap.” he said immediately when he picked up.

“This better be good, Sam.” replied Steve, still feeling groggy.

“We think we got some news. I might have found Bucky.” he said.

Steve jumped out of bed swiftly and quickly. He went into his bathroom and closed the door, making sure Tony was still asleep. “Where?” he asked Sam softly.

“Somewhere near Romania. He is trying to lay low but we got him at a market for sure. That was 2 days ago. We aren’t allowed to watch the live feeds of public cameras, just past footage archives.” Sam told him, “I got help from your friend Sharon Carter.”

Steve went stiff. He had royally been fucked over by her before. She acted interested in him a while ago, when Hydra was still in control of S.H.I.E.L.D. and he felt like he could die at any moment. When he thought Fury was dead he pretty much assumed he was next on the list. All they ever did was kiss but he still felt guilty about it. He knew she liked him and he didn't like her, which made him feel like he may be using her for information. 

“Oh I see.” said Steve. “Thanks for the update. I don’t think we should go after him just yet. We still have the press watching us all the time, we still need Sokovia to blow over. Unless he does something stupid, we are just going to have to wait.”

“You got it, Cap. Sorry to call so early but you told me to call you day or night whenever I had new information at all.” 

“No, you did great work, Sam. I appreciate it. I can still get some more sleep. Keep me posted.” Steve said. Sam agreed and hung up.

Steve came out of the bathroom into his dimly lit bedroom and looked over Tony’s angelic shirtless form. He stood there in his boxer briefs, listening to his snores, and debating whether or not to wake him. 

For the first time ever, he didn’t say anything and decided to keep Bucky’s sighting a secret. 

He got back into bed with Tony and spooned him from behind. That caused Tony to stir and wake up slightly, “Sup?” he mumbled with eyes still closed.

“Why are you still here, huh?” whispered Steve lovingly in his ear.

“I know I said I’d leave, but I got so comfy like I am now. You wore me out.” purred Tony.

“The guys are going to notice you spent the night, Tony.” Steve replied, kissing his shoulder.. “Let em. I don’t care.” he mumbled back.

“Go act like you slept on the couch at least?” asked Steve.

A deep groan came from Tony, “Why can’t you go do that? You already got up before.”

“C’mon Tony…” he laughed.

Tony sighed and huffed and puffed and got up to quickly and lazily put his clothes back on. He left the room and plopped down on the couch in the common room immediately.

Steve laid in his bed, a thousand thoughts racing through his mind. Bucky is alive and well...he still might be evil. He saved him from the helicopter crash, but that didn’t necessarily mean anything. His old feelings for Bucky started to rush back just like the last time he saw him. 

He was worried and anxious and happy and sad all at once. After considering the new information he just received, Steve drifted off to sleep for another couple hours.

As he drifted off to sleep, he began to dream. He dreamed he was sitting on the edge of his bed receiving a blowjob. Steve’s head was thrown back with his eyes closed, so he couldn’t see who was kneeling between his legs. It felt real and he was soon orgasming in his dream. “Oh God!” he moaned, “You’re so amazing. I love you. I love you so much.” Steve muttered as he sat up and looked down.

He found Bucky’s smiling face pop up from between his legs, “I love you too.”

Steve shot awake with his heart racing. He was hard and noticed his underwear was sticky. Feeling embarrassed and confused, Steve got up to take a cold shower and get cleaned up.

When he came out the bathroom he looked over at his phone and noticed a note on top from Tony. It read: “I left to go to work. Text me later, old man. Sleepover at my penthouse soon? Kisses, Tony” The note made his heart flutter and his eyes roll.

The dream , however, made Steve feel extremely anxious. It was hard to shake off.

He put on some active wear and went out of his bedroom. The team was spread around the common room, watching TV and eating breakfast. Wanda stood as soon as Steve came in the room. “Steven!” she smiled, hugging him.

“Good morning!” he said cheerily, “What’s going on?”

“I’m so excited. We only have one more training session before Natasha said I can join you guys on missions. Vision and I have been working on some containment chants. I think I’m able to control myself so much better now!” she beamed.

He looked over her shoulder at Vision sitting on the couch. Vision smiled and saluted at him.

“That’s great Wanda. Want me to come join you guys down there?” Steve offered. She agreed and they went off with Natasha down to the training room.

Wanda passed through the final training test with ease. They were all smiles leaving the gym.

Natasha hung behind everyone to talk to Steve in private. She touched his arm gently, “Hey, you got a second?”

“Ofcourse.” he said, making sure the rest of the S.H.I.E.L.D. guys were out of earshot.

“So Sam isn’t around today I noticed. Do you know what that’s about?” she asked.

“He was working on something last night. He must be sleeping.” answered Steve.

“What was he working on?” Natasha asked, furrowing her brow.

He shrugged, “Something…..for me.”

Natasha narrowed her eyes as she looked up into his. She started to unfasten her fighting gloves she was wearing, “Why are you being so secretive? What is it?”

“He was looking for someone.” he said.

She paused, “Bruce? You found him?”

“Not Bruce.” he said solemnly. 

Natasha looked confused then alert suddenly. She scoffed, “Seriously? You realize we are already skating on such thin ice right? You really want to go down that road again?”  
Steve’s eyes widened, “Keep your voice down!” he whispered.

Natasha grabbed his wrist and drug him into a nearby meeting room with soundproof walls. She locked the door behind them, “Steve, he tried to kill you. Not just once! All this time we assumed he was dead again-”

“I know!” he exclaimed, then smoothed out his voice, “He also saved me. He…might remember me. Now we shut down that HYDRA force, he hasn’t been-”

“No. This is not your responsibility.” said Natasha, putting her hands on his shoulders and staring daggers into his eyes, “Listen to me, Steve. Do NOT pursue him. He is not your friend. Do you hear me?” He paused for a minute and stared back at her.

“Steve.” she said sternly, “We can’t afford anymore bad press or big messes. I mean it.”

“Okay, I won’t.” Steve said. “Okay.” she said, nodding and letting him go. Natasha crossed her arms, “Are you going to tell Tony?” 

Steve stiffened, “Tell Tony what?” “That Bucky is alive?” she said cautiously.

“What does that have to do with Tony?” he asked, looking out the windows.

Natasha sighed, “I uh...know he spent the night with you last night.”

Steve looked mortified. This is exactly what he was afraid of. He knew he could never lie to Natasha. She had been through too much with him. He was speechless.

She looked apologetic, “I’m sorry. I wasn’t trying to pry, really! I just noticed his car parked next to my bike in the garage last night. He said you two were busy yesterday, then I saw him go in the living room this morning...from your room.”

Steve scoffed and covered his face, “Look...uh...it’s not what you think…”

“You can't lie to me. I was just trying to say you need to warn him.” Natasha said in a comforting voice, “This makes Tony a target. He needs to know. That creep might go after him and try and finish-” 

“Hush!” he said, seeming a little annoyed, “I don’t want this to get out, Nat.”

“What like I’m stupid?” she scoffed, “I can keep things to myself. I can keep what we found in that HYDRA bunker to myself as well. However, you know Tony needs to be prepared. If you care about him at all...” she told him.

Steve calmed himself, “Of course I care about him.”

“Are you guys...serious or-?” Natasha started to ask.

“Jesus, Nat!” he scoffed.

“I’m sorry! I’m just curious. I didn’t even know he wasn’t with Pepper. They invited us out to brunch a month ago.” she said.

“We’re...I don’t know. It’s personal.” Steve struggled with his words.

“Do you have feeling for him?” Natasha asked, eyebrows raised with her mouth hinting at a smile.

Steve ran a hand through his hair and groaned, “I…..maybe...I can’t say.”

“If you guys care about each other,” she said evenly, “you should be able to talk to him.”

“I just know he will not take it well. He is so up and down right now with Pepper and the press lately...I don’t want to give him more to stress about.” he said nervously.

“You can’t leave him in the dark, Cap. Tony will kill him the first fight he starts. You don’t want any of your friends to be hurt or...die, you know you can avoid it altogether. Talk to him.”she said.

Steve sighed, “I will try. He’s been upset lately.” “We’re all upset.” Natasha said.

“I know…” he nodded, looking her over. Natasha still was worried about Bruce every single day. She would check radar constantly for his plane and scan stories reporting anything that sounded like a crash landing somewhere.

Most days she put on a good leader face, but today the sadness came through. Natasha hugged him, “Look, try to see the big picture, okay? Try not to let your memories   
They pulled back from the hug. 

“I also can understand you and Tony’s situation, Steve. It’s okay. You both are going through some hard times.” she smiled, “I’m here if you ever need anything.”

Steve smiled back at her, feeling a little better. 

They left the meeting room and started for living quarters.  
\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Time: Beginning of Civil War  
Location: Lagos, Nigeria

A few days later, the new team was called to their first terrorist mission with Wanda. She lost control of her power again, and accidentally blew up a building full of civilians.

After Cap called for fire and rescue, they flew back to America that night.

The jet was quiet on the way back home. Natasha flew while Sam, Wanda, and Steve rode strapped in their seats. Wanda stared into space and cried silently to herself. She was just approved to do some work and she felt like she ruined everything again.

Steve gave her a reassuring look to try and calm her. She forced a smile back.

“Fury wants to see us tomorrow.” said Natasha as she looked down at her communicator.

“Our attack coverage is probably all over CNN right now.” said Sam.

“Not helpful, Sam.” Steve said in his direction. “So we’re in trouble with the boss?” asked Wanda, looking around at all of them.

“I’m more worried about the U.S. government to be honest. They are the boss.” Natasha said over her shoulder. 

Steve’s phone vibrated as he got a text from Tony. It read: “I’m at a college seminar and I’m only worried about YOU. How did the mission go?” He must not had time to see the news yet. There was also a huge time difference between them.

“I will call you later.” Steve replied.

Meanwhile, after Tony’s speech, he was confronted by another civilian who lost a family member in Sokovia. It tore him up inside.  
After he left MIT and got in his car, he called Steve to tell him what had happened. He didn’t answer.   
\--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The next day Wanda was sitting in her room watching the news coverage of their failed Lagos mission. Steve noticed and came in her room to warned her it was bad to watch negative coverage. She said it was her fault. 

He took responsibility, “I should have noticed that bomb vest before you did. Then Rumlow said ‘Bucky’ and suddenly I was a 16 year old kid again in Brooklyn.”

“It’s on both of us.” Wanda said.

He starts to give her a pep talk but Vision materialized through her wall. “Hey!” Steve exclaimed.

 

“Sorry, Mr.Rogers, Wanda. You told me to let you know when Mr.Stark is here. He brought a guest” said Vision. Steve furrowed his brow, “Who?” “The secretary of state.” Vision replied.

Secretary Ross met with all of the Avengers in the soundproof boardroom. He accused them of being too dangerous and proposed the Accords. Steve wasn’t having it and kept glancing over at Tony, who’s face only read that he was upset.

“Three days the UN meets to ratify these Accords.” Secretary Ross said, “So talk it over.”

“If we come to a decision you don’t like?” asked Natasha. “Retire.” he replied, leaving.

They all started to debate and argue in the living area whether the Accords were worth signing. Tony laid on the couch, covering his face. “What the hell is his problem?”Steve thought to himself, staring at Tony,   
“Why does he bring this down on us and not say a word?”

In the midst of the debate, Natasha noticed his silence too, “Being uncharacteristically non-hyperverbal, Tony.” she said over at him.

“Because he has already made up his mind.” Steve said aloud, earning a glare from Tony.

Tony got up and said he just had a headache. He was in discomfort. Steve did notice bags around his eyes when he arrived. That is how he looks when he drinks all night in order to sleep. 

Tony made his phone project the image of the boy who died in Sokovia. He told them about how his mother had approached him the previous day. Everyone looked solemn and guilty.

Scanning all of their faces, Tony said, “We need to be put in check! If we are boundaryless, we’re no better than the bad guys.”

“Tony, someone dies on your watch, you don’t give up.” said Steve, basically quoting Tony back at him.  
“Who said we are giving up?” asked Tony. Natasha looked back and forth from the two of them. 

“We are if we aren’t taking responsibility for our actions. This document just shifts the blame.” said Steve.

James interjected from the other side of the room, “I’m sorry Steve, that is dangerously arrogant. This is the UN we are answering to. This is not S.H.I.E.L.D. This is not HYDRA.”

“No,” agreed Steve, “but these are people with agendas. Agendas change.”

“That’s good.” said Tony, “That’s why I am here. When I realized my weapons were in the wrong hands, I shut it down.”

“You chose to do that.” scoffed Steve, “If we sign this, we surrender our right to choose. What if they send us somewhere we don’t want to go? What if there is somewhere we are needed and they don’t let us? We may not be perfect.” He paused and made eye contact with Wanda, “But the safest hands are still our own.”

Tony huffed, “If we don’t sign it now, it will be done to us later. That won’t be pretty.”

“You’re saying they will come for me.” said Wanda.

Vision looked at her, “We would protect you.”

“Maybe Tony’s right.” said Natasha. Tony and Steve both gave her a look of shock. She explained how if they do what they need to now they are still kind of in control.

“Didn’t you tell the government to kiss your ass a few years ago?” Sam asked her.

“I’m reading the terrain. We have made very public mistakes. We need to earn their trust back.” Natasha told the room.

Tony pointed at her, “Focus up, did I mishear you? Did you just agree with me?” 

“Oh, I want to take it back now.” she hissed. “No no no!” Tony said, “You can’t retract that. So case closed, I win.”

Steve’s phone buzzed as he received a text message. It was from Sharon Carter. It read: “She’s gone. In her sleep. Service in 2 days in London.” Steve’s heart dropped. Peggy Carter was dead. His eyes became watery, “I have to go.”

He went straight down the stairs into his bedroom.

Tears came streaming down his face as the sobbing consumed him. She was his last real friend alive who didn’t try to kill him. He looked over at his framed picture he had of them together in the 40s. The tears continued to shudder through him as he stared down at it.

Steve’s bedroom door slid open and Tony was standing there in his room. He locked it behind him and immediately rushed over to Steve sitting on his bed.

“Aw Steve. What, honey? What’s wrong?” Tony asked softly, wrapping an arm around his shoulders, “Did I upset you?”

“No it’s not that.” Steve sobbed. Tony looked down at the picture he was holding, “Oh no, I didn’t realize. I’m so sorry for your loss, Steve. Come here.”

Steve set down the picture and hugged Tony, sobbing into his neck.

Tony shushed him and rubbed his back, “It will be okay. You got extra time with her now, and that counts for something. I bet she really enjoyed spending her last days with you visiting her.”

Steve’s sobs became softer and softer. Tony cupped his neck and kissed his tear stained cheeks over and over until he stopped. They sat on the bed silently staring down at the floor for a minute. Steve leaned his head on Tony’s shoulder and they held hands. He finally started to calm down. 

“Ya know...I’m sorry if I was a dick up there.” said Tony softly.

Steve shook his head slightly, “You weren’t. We just...don’t see eye to eye on this Accords thing.” 

“I tried to call you yesterday. You didn’t answer.” 

Steve sat up straight and wiped his face, “What does that have to do with anything?”

“I was trying to warn you about this. I was trying to tell you what happened to me. I needed your support.” said Tony, looking at him.

“I wasn’t going to change my mind just because you asked me to before you drug Mr.Secretary into this. Actually, I think you probably wouldn’t have warned me beforehand. You knew I would get upset like I am. ” said Steve, looking back at him defensively.

“Oh no?” said Tony, looking a little perturbed, “Speaking of not telling each other things, what’s this I hear about Bucky Barnes being spotted in Romania?”

Steve went silent and let his eyes drift away. “Yeah sure, that’s what I thought.” Tony said, scooting to face him, “I had to hear it from Vision. Fucking Vision! He said you froze up around that terrorist because he knew your friend. Is that about right? Care to tell me about that?”

“You seem to know.” said Steve quietly, “That’s not what’s important right now. I wasn’t expecting you to come here telling me to sign my life away, Tony.”

Tony shook his head, “God you’re so fucking stubborn. We need to sign these Accords for the greater good. Sometimes you have to answer to someone above you. You were in the military for Christ’s sake. You should understand how this works.”

Steve rolled his eyes, “Why’d you come down here? To argue with me?”

“I came to check on you, little brat.” sneered Tony, “I’m trying to fucking protect you. Protect us.” He gestured his hand between them.

“I feel guilty about every casualty, Tony. You know that. I even take responsibility for Lagos.” Steve said sadly. 

Tony scoffed, “You were supposed to call me and tell me about that mission too. Remember? You did not. I’ve asked over and over again to just answer your fucking phone! Always keeping me in the dark! Why the hell was Wanda even out there already? You think a few weeks of training would have a powerful witch under control?”

“Jesus, so I didn’t check in every five seconds because Wanda was upset! Natasha and the rest of the S.H.I.E.L.D. team were the ones who decided to put her on the field. I was trying to prevent her from needing to be locked in the chamber.” Steve paused, “She is my friend, and she needed my support.”

“You were avoiding me.” said Tony.

Steve admitted to himself he was sort of avoiding Tony. Ever since he heard Bucky was on the loose, he realized, he hadn’t been thinking straight. He was trying to avoid saying the wrong thing to him.

“I wasn’t. I promise.” Steve told him, “I’m just trying to help everyone all the time. That’s all I ever want to do.” He reached for Tony’s hand but he snatched it out of his grasp.

“Just because you always have good intentions, doesn’t mean you always make perfect decisions.” Tony said flatly, “You’re not perfect, you’re still a human being. We may not be in a relationship but at least we are friends right? We’re supposed to be honest and disclose things to each other.”

Steve stared at him, “I….don’t know what to say, Tony.” he stood, “You’ve backed me into a corner.”

Tony looked up at him, suddenly seeming so tired. The exhaustion seemed emotional.   
“I have to get ready for London anyway.” said Steve, “So could you just let me get packed?”

Tony sighed, “Steve...I’m not trying to be mean. We all have to admit our own shit.”

Steve shook his head, “I admit I’m at fault all the time, Tony. I don’t know if you recall...”

“That you do. I’m sorry again. I know you are grieving...I should have picked a better time to have this talk, I guess.” he said, standing up. Steve shrugged and rolled his eyes.

Tony hooked a finger under his chin and lifted his head up to look into those beautiful blue eyes, “We also got to keep up appearances in front of the team, Cap. I don’t want to seem to be treating you special.”

“I know.” Steve said quietly, looking blankly at him.

Tony gave him a sympathetic smile and kissed him gently on the lips. He surprisingly accepted it. The kiss made Steve soften the stern look he was giving him. 

“Have a safe trip. Tell me if you need me.” he told Steve lovingly.

He watched Tony leave the room.


	5. Chapter 5

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There may be a ton of similarities to the movies, but I promise I made it my own and it's worth it. Bucky and Steve reunion too yay!

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Chapter 5

Location: LONDON

Steve went to the UK for a few days and attended the funeral. He was surprised by Natasha after the service.

“Who else signed?” asked Steve when she walked up to him in the church.

“Tony, Rhodey, and Vision.” Natasha answered. 

Tony didn’t even give it a second thought. Steve knew he would do that. “Clint?” he said.

“Says he is retired.” she said, smiling slightly. 

“Wanda?”

“TBD.” she responded, “I am about to go to Vienna for the signing of the accords. There is plenty of space on the jet.” Steve sighed and looked down. 

“Just because it’s the path of least resistance,” said Natasha, “doesn’t mean it’s the wrong path. Staying together as a team is better than not.”

“What are we giving up?” he asked. She sighed at him and gave him an annoyed look.

This could mean the end of the Avengers...and the end of him and Tony. He didn’t want either of those things.

“I can’t sign it.” Steve said, shaking his head at her. “I know.” Natasha said. He shrugged, “Then why are you here?” 

“I didn’t want you to be alone. C’mon.” said Natasha, pulling him into a hug.  
\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

After the service, Steve joined Sharon at her hotel. Sam wasn’t far behind. He could tell Sharon was trying to flirt with him during their entire walk. Steve humored her but didn’t actually flirt back.

He did ask her if she told Peggy about spying on him. “You mean when I was doing my job? No. She had enough secrets.” Sharon said, touching the elevator button, “Thanks for walking me back.”

“Sure.” said Steve. Sam approached them, “There is something you have got to see!” he said in a panic to the two of them.

They went up to Sharon’s room and put on the news. Steve’s jaw was hanging open as he watched the footage of the UN tower ripped to shreds by a bomb. He was instantly worried about Natasha, then the news flashed a picture of Bucky, calling him the main suspect.

Sam and Steve looked at each other anxiously. “I have to go to work.” said Sharon, “You two coming?”

Steve stood, “Of course, let’s go.”

They flew together in Sharon’s private jet to Vienna. She went straight to the accident. Steve and Sam hung back nearby in a coffee shop in hats and glasses. Steve called Natasha. “Yeah?” she answered.

“You alright, Nat?” asked Steve.

“Yeah, I got lucky. Look, I know you heard about Barnes. I know exactly what you are thinking, Steve. Stay in London, fly home tomorrow, and meet me at the compound in a day, alright? Don’t make it worse. For all of us, please?” She said.

“You saying you’ll arrest me?” he asked.

“No, but someone will if you interfere. That’s how it works now. Wait...you’re already fucking here aren’t you? Jesus Christ, Steve!” she said.

“If he is this far gone, I should be the one to bring him in.” he said, trying not to sound too obvious in front of Sam. 

Natasha sighed, “....Why?”

“Because I’m the least likely to die trying.” he told her and hung up. Sam looked over at him, “She try to talk you out of it? She might have a point.”

“He’d do it for me.” said Steve sternly. “In 1945, maybe.” said Sam, “Just making sure we considered our options. Usually the people who shoot at you also shoot at me. I can’t deflect bullets as well as you can.”

Sharon pulled up outside the coffee shop where they were hiding out. She came in and gave them a file, “This is all the head start you will get.”

“Thanks.” Steve told her, trying to give her a handsome smile.

“Hurry,” she sighed, “we have orders to shoot your friend on site.”  
\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Location: Bucharest, Romania  
Time: The day after the Vienna attack

 

After some searching, Sam finally pinpointed Bucky in a village where they thought he would be. Steve found his apartment he was using and waited there for him. 

He looked around the simplistic shack of an apartment. It was interesting to see how he was living now. At least he was living on his own, that should mean that he is capable of being aware and normal. That’s what Steve hoped. 

He was growing anxious as he waited. Steve hadn’t seen Bucky since the helicopter incident, so he was nervous. He knew there had to be something inside him that was still there.

“Heads up Cap.” said Sam into his earpiece, “Special German forces approaching from the South.”

“Understood.” said Steve, before feeling eyes on him. He slowly turned and finally came face to face with Bucky. His Bucky. His chest got tight as he asked, “Do you know me?”

Bucky nodded, “You’re Steve. I read about you in a museum.”

“They’ve set the perimeter.” warned Sam in his ear.

“Stop lying. I know you are nervous, and it’s okay. Just be honest.” said Steve in a cautious, but friendly tone.

“I wasn’t in Vienna.” said Bucky, holding up his hands, “I don’t do that anymore.”

“They’ve entered the building, Steve!” Sam exclaimed into Steve’s ear.

“The people who think you were in Vienna, they’re coming here now. They don’t plan to take you alive.” Steve said to Bucky softly.

Bucky nodded, “Good strategy.”

Sam chimed in Steve’s ear one last time, “They’re on the roof. I’m compromised.”

Steve shook his head and stepped toward Bucky, “This doesn’t have to end in a fight, Buck.”

Bucky laughed, his long hair slapping around his shoulders. He looked like he hadn’t shaved in a few days. Steve was trying to choose his words carefully and get him out of there.

“It always ends in a fight.” said Bucky.

“You pulled me away from the river, why?” Steve asked. 

“I don’t know.” Bucky lied.

“Yes you do.” he demanded.

A grenade crashed into the window suddenly. Bucky kicked it to Steve who blocked it with his shield as it exploded. Bucky immediately started to defend himself as cops swung in through every opening in the apartment. 

Steve watched him slam a cop into a wall, “Buck stop!” he yelled, “You’re gonna kill someone.”

Bucky slammed Steve into the floor and punched the floor to grab a backpack. “I’m not going to kill anyone.” Bucky said, helping him up. They fled behind Cap’s shield as the police showered bullets at them. The two of them jumped out the open window and ran for it.

They began fighting cops as they made their way down the fire escape. They thought they had made it until a man in a Black Panther suit knocked Bucky down out of nowhere.

They all ran around on top of cars, Black Panther chasing Bucky, Steve chasing Black Panther, and Sam chasing all of them.   
James Rhodes suddenly swooped down in his armor with his hands drawn, “STAND DOWN.” He said boastfully. The four of them were all encircled by law enforcement and broken pavement they had ruined from the bridges above them.

Bucky stood behind Steve. “Congratulations Cap.” said James, “You’re a criminal.” He went over to the Black Panther and took off the mask to reveal Prince T’Challa. “Your Highness.” said James.

Sam and Steve, stared at Black Panther, shocked. They were all taken into terrorism task force custody. Bucky was locked away separated from the three other men.

Throughout their ride to Berlin, Sam began examining T’Challa, “So you like cats?”

Steve turned to him, “Sam!” he hissed.

“What? Don’t you want to know?” asked Sam.

“Your suit is vibranium?” Steve asked T’challa. 

“My suit is a mantle, passed from warrior to warrior. I ask you… as both warrior and king… how long do you think you can keep your friend safe from me?” T’challa said.

Steve went straight faced and silent. T’challa’s father was killed, he understood that he wanted blood. He thought about telling him he doesn’t believe it was Bucky, but he saw it useless. 

They arrived at a bunker. Steve watched men take Bucky in a bulletproof pod and move him in front of heavy doors.

Sharon Carter and an older man came over to the three “fugitive” men. 

“What’s going to happen to Bucky?” Steve asked Sharon.

The older man interjected, “The same that should happen to you, psyche evaluation and extradition.”

They basically had their rights stripped away and were told that they were to stay in that building until further notice. Steve looked back at Bucky and caught his eye as he was moved behind the big doors. His heart ached. Earlier, when he had just spoke to him, he was being normal old Bucky. He remembered him. Maybe he even missed him.

They met up with Tony and Natasha down a skywalk. Natasha was furious with Steve but still was trying to remain friendly and understanding about his actions. “For the record, this is what making things worse looks like.” Natasha said as soon as she saw Steve.

“He’s alive.” said Steve.

Tony was fuming on his cell with the secretary of state as he walked up. “Consequences? You bet there will be consequences.” he said into the phone before he hung up.

“Consequences?” asked Steve.

“Yeah, dumbass. The secretary wants you prosecuted. I had to give him something.” Tony said to him, looking very unhappy.

They were told they were lucky they weren’t in jail and their weapons were confiscated.  
\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

That evening, Steve was staring at monitors at the control room across from him in a glass-walled office alone. Tony knocked on the glass door to get Steve’s attention. He was wearing his a button down shirt, vest and tie. His blazer was draped over his arm. Steve made a “come in” gesture with his hand. Tony walked into the office and put his blazer down on the table, “Hey.” he said.

Steve was sitting at the table crossing his arms, “Hey.”

“Want to see something cool?” Tony said, showing him a box containing pens FDR used from his Father’s archive.

“FDR may have brought our country closer to war using those pens.” said Steve flatly. He was just waiting for more lecturing about how he was headed down the wrong path.

“Hey, if not for these, you wouldn’t be here. See? This is like….an olive branch? I want you to know I’m still with you.” He paused and looked around them. “I-I still want to be with you.” Tony said, sitting next to him, “I’m still supporting you even though you ignored Natasha and my warning. So, why not actually listen for once?”

Steve shook his head and huffed, “You two still don’t get it though. You don’t understand what me and Bucky have been through together. You don’t know what he did for me. It’s like you and Pepper. We always find our way back to each other.”

Tony glared at him with a hurt look, “Don’t do that. Don’t compare.”

“I’m trying to get you to relate and understand.” Steve said, staring down at the pens.

“I understand you are defending a lunatic and that doesn’t make us look good.” said Tony, scanning around to make sure they weren’t attracting attention.

There was a brief silence. Steve didn’t see the point in responding.

“I love you.” sighed Tony, making it look like a casual conversation.

Steve’s clenched his jaw and his face shot back toward Tony.

“Even though sometimes I want to punch you in your perfect teeth.” He added, “I care about you and that is why I’m just trying to save your perfect ass.” Tony put his hands together, “We need you, Cap. So far, everything that happened today can still be forgiven. Bucky can go to a nice psych ward instead of a Wakandan prison. I will even try to get you visitation. You just need to sign the accords.”

“I….love you too.” said Steve, surprising Tony and himself. It needed to be said. He didn't want Tony to think he felt any other way.

Steve sighed,“I’m not trying to make this difficult.” Tony stood up and paced around the office to prevent seeming like his body language was anything more than a colleague. 

“I know,” said Tony, “always trying to do what’s right huh?” 

“If I see a situation pointed south I can’t ignore it.” Steve told him, “I wish I could but-”

“No you don’t.” retorted Tony, still pacing around the room.

“Okay fine, I don't. I’ve always been this way. I was changed to fight for the greater good, by your own father, I might add.” 

“No way, did you know my dad? I never knew!” Tony said sarcastically. 

Steve cocked his head at him. “Dad never shut up about you.” Tony added.

“What do you think he would say about us now?” asked Steve.

That made Tony pause and turn away from him to look out toward the control room across the hall. “Why the fuck would he ask that?” Tony thought to himself.

Steve realized that was insensitive and apologized. Tony heard a soft mumble behind him. He turned around, “What’s that?”

He noticed Steve had picked up one of the pens and was fidgeting with it in his hands, “I’m not saying this accords thing is impossible…” Steve told him, “but there would have to be safeguards.”

Tony leaned on a chair in front of him, “Sure. Once we put out the PR fire. Documents can be changed. I will make sure you and Wanda get reinstated.”

“Wanda? What about Wanda?” Steve said, getting a little flustered.

“She’s confined to the compound currently. Vision is there to keep her safe.” he replied defensively.

That pissed Steve off. He stood and paced, eventually storming over to Tony’s side of the office.

Tony backed up a bit nervously, “Easy...easy!” 

Steve stopped right in front him, making Tony stiffen. “God, Tony...every time I think you see things the right way…” he said, raising his voice.

“What?” Tony barked, “You guys already live there. It’s a Goddamn hundred acre compound with a pool and a screening room. There are worse ways to protect people.”

“So you see this as protection?” Steve pointed at him angrily, “It’s internment.”

“This is the best I got, Cap. She isn’t a U.S. citizen.” Tony told him, crossing his arms.

“Come ON Tony…” scoffed Steve, shaking his head. His muscles could be seen through his sweater tensing and flexing. He was livid.

“I can’t exactly get a fucking visa for someone who is seen as a weapon of mass destruction! The footage they have playing on TV 24/7 doesn’t exactly make her seem trustworthy.” Tony said, throwing his arms in the air.

They both stood there silently and tried to compose themselves. They got the attention of an intern since the two men were yelling and waving their arms around. 

Steve waited until the intern disappeared around the corner to continue speaking, “She’s a kid and she is my friend.” He was calmer and his voice was even again.

Tony covered his face and groaned, “Give me a break, shit!” He tried to control his breathing so he didn’t have a panic attack right there in front of the whole intelligence agency.

Steve put his hands on his hips and stared at him, trying to even his breathing as well. When Anthony finally uncovered his face, his eyes were glazed over. He took a few deep breaths and loosened his tie.

“You okay?” asked Steve.

“No...” Tony shook his head, “Not even a little. I hate this.”

“What else can I do, Tony?” he said, generally concerned.

“In a perfect world I would like to kiss and make up...but that’s not an option right now.”

“What about a hug?” Steve offered, his tone gentle. “Aren’t you too mad at me for that?” Tony mumbled bitterly.

“No. I’m mad at this situation. This whole thing is…” Steve shrugged. “Fucked.” Tony finished.

Steve’s mouth turned into a tight smile. That was the look he made when something made him uncomfortable and he was too polite to agree or disagree out loud.

“I don’t need a hug.” said Tony, clearing his throat, “I need...you to be reasonable.”

“You’re never going to understand my reasoning behind things, it seems. Not about this, Tony...you can’t possibly. I can’t bend over backward for what I don’t believe in.” Cap said, shaking his head. They both stared at their shoes.

“I am doing what has to be done.” said Tony softly, “To stave off something worse.”

Steve slammed the pen on the table,“Keep telling yourself that, Tony.” Tony’s head snapped over to look at him. “Hate to break up the set.” Cap said before leaving the office.

That made Tony’s heart dropped to his stomach as he turned to the monitors of Bucky across from him. He stared silently at the man Steve was willing to risk his life for. Did Captain America just leave the Avengers...for Bucky? Did Steve just leave him? Had Tony been delusional about the two of them all this time? 

He remembered their talk about Bucky a few months back when they had first gotten together.

He basically said he used to be in a relationship with him. Why wouldn’t Steve be delusional enough to believe he had a second chance at love with Bucky? 

Tony started to feel jealousy and anger come over him.

Meanwhile, Steve went to an office full of monitors with Sharon and Sam to oversee Bucky’s psych evaluation. Steve was sharing his suspicions with Sharon about Bucky’s case, “Why would the task force release this photo to begin with?” he asked her, pointing to the blurry photo of Barnes. 

She looked it over, “Get the word out?”

“You can get a guy out of hiding easily that way. Set off a bomb, get your picture taken, have the world looking for the winter soldier.” Steve told her.

“You think someone framed Barnes to find him?” asked Sharon.

Sam interjected, “Steve, we it took us 2 year to find him!”

“We didn’t bomb the UN. That turns heads.” Steve said.

“That doesn’t guarantee whoever that was would get him, just that we would right now.” Sharon said, then turned her gaze to to the monitor of Bucky getting interrogated. 

“Exactly.” said Steve, also looking at the monitor. The interview was compromised last minute and there was suddenly a power outage. 

Tony looked around the suddenly dark building through the glass office, “FRIDAY, can I get a source for this outage?” he asked his A.I as he put on his glasses. 

Steve and Sam ran straight to the room Bucky was being held in. They tried to fight the terrorist controlling Bucky but he got away. The task force’s building erupted into a panic. 

Tony found Natasha and Sharon and tried to move through the halls to escape. Bucky was full Winter Soldier mode, knocking out every guard he came across. 

Tony turned his wristband into a iron glove and zapped Bucky when they ran into him. Natasha tried fighting him off, but he was like a machine that wouldn’t stopping attacking. T’Challa began to fight the Winter Soldier and tried to rip off his metal arm, but was unsuccessful. They tumbled down the stairs.

Bucky tried to fly off in a helicopter but Steve ran onto the roof to stop him just in time. The helicopter crashed in to the water below with Bucky in it. Ignoring his deja vu, Steve dove into the water after him and emerged with his friend gasping in his arms.

Steve and Sam made a run for it, taking the winter soldier with them somewhere safe and hidden.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Angst, love, heartbreak, fights. Everything you need!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is where my chapters start to get longer. This particular chapter took me a REALLY long time to complete. I would love more feedback! Thanks for reading.

Chapter 6

Location: an old abandoned warehouse   
Time: almost dawn, evening of the great escape of the Winter Soldier

 

Bucky woke up in the empty warehouse with his metal arm clamped in a vice. Sam called Steve over and he asked the winter soldier personal questions to make sure he was aware of who they were.

They questioned him about the guy who broke in and set him off, but he didn’t know anything. He couldn’t even remember attacking the guards in the building they escaped from.

All Bucky could tell him was the terrorist guy wanted to know where Bucky was held when HYDRA was brainwashing him “Why did he need to know exactly where you were kept?” asked Steve.

“Because,” Bucky sighed, “I’m not the only winter soldier.”

He explained to Steve and Sam about how he was part of an elite death squad and how they could take down a country in one day if they wanted to. Sam sighed, “Great. This would have been good to know about a week ago.” 

Steve’s mind was racing. Obviously the terrorist in Nigeria that referred to Bucky was part of that death squad. Once again his world was turning upside down. He said what he always usually said in these situations, “If we call Tony…”

“He won’t believe us.” Sam scoffed.   
“What if he did…” said Steve softly. 

“Who knows if the accords would let him help.” Sam told him. He had a point there. That left Steve at a loss. Did he fuck up everything with him by refusing to sign the accords? His chest tightened at the thought of a possible life without Tony.

“I guess...we’re on our own.” Steve said incredulously. 

“Maybe not.” said Sam deep in thought, “I know a guy.”

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Tony was with Secretary Ross and Natasha patching up a cut on his brow from the fight with Bucky at the task force building. Ross was asking if he knew where they had gone and threatened to put special ops on the rogue men.

“WE can handle it.” Tony assured him.

“Obviously not.” he replied.

“What will your special ops do?” asked Natasha, “Kill Steve Rogers?”

“Only if they’re provoked.” assured Ross.

Tony’s stomach hurt from the thought, “Give us 72 hours so we can be prepared. We will take them in. Guaranteed.” Natasha noticed him flinch.

Ross thought for a minute, “I’ll grant 36.” He walked away.

Tony clutched his chest and fell against the wall. “You okay?” asked Natasha, patting his back.

“Always. 36 hours is...doable. Right?” he said nervously.

“We’re understaffed.” She nodded.

She urged him to stand and they began walking through the still panicking employees to their car they called. “It would be great if we had a Hulk right about now. Any shot?” he asked her.

Natasha frowned and signed, “Probably not…”

“He wouldn’t really be on our side anyway.” said Tony, pointing toward a hallway for them to turn down.

“I have an idea though.” said Natasha. “Fantastic, me too.” he responded.

“I have to go to Queens for my idea.” said Tony.

“Mines right downstairs in the Terrorist Centre.” Natasha smiled.

“Care to ride with me to the airport?” he asked her as they got in the car and it started off down the street. Tony took off his vest and shirt to get some air. He was sitting in his tank top and slacks, taking deep calming breaths. Natasha watched him for a minute before speaking, “Hey Tony?”

“Hmm?” he responded, with his eyes closed, still breathing deeply.

“I’m not trying to add stress to your day, but….for full disclosure, I know about you and Steve.” she said.

Tony’s eyes shot open, “What?”

“He didn't tell me. I figured it out. I just thought I would tell you before we possibly have to bring him home kicking and screaming.” Natasha told him hesitantly.

Tony rubbed his temples, “What exactly do you know?”

“You guys spent the night together at the compound.” she admitted, “He wouldn’t tell me much else other than he might have feelings for you.”

He exhaled loudly and deeply, “Is that all?”

“Yes. Please don’t be mad.” she pleaded.

“I’m not.” he said, shaking his head, “I just...didn’t want anyone to know. Especially since I don’t even know if there will be a ‘me and Steve’ anymore.”

Natasha nodded, “I imagine this whole thing is pretty strenuous on you two.”

“This is exactly why he didn’t want to make us official. He didn’t want our work to split us up. He kept telling me he didn’t want to cause me anymore heartache. I guess I see what he means now.” said Tony.

She looked away awkwardly, “I’m sorry, Tony.”

“I tried, that’s all you can do with him. He is so hard to figure out. Always telling me one thing and doing the complete opposite.” he said. “I’m just praying I don’t have to lose him”

Natasha gave him a sympathetic smile, “I am too.”

They were pulling up to the airport. “Just uh...Natasha, don’t say anything-” Tony started.

“I know, it’s okay.” she said. They arrived to the plane and Natasha saw him off to New York.

Tony then went to recruit a kid that called himself Spider-Man.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Time: a day after the great escape of the winter soldier  
Location: Germany

 

Steve was under an overpass with Sharon as she opened her trunk of her car. She revealed the gear for Sam and Steve that they had confiscated. 

Bucky sat in a getaway car behind Sam while they watched them through the windshield. 

Sharon kept glancing toward Bucky cautiously. 

“I owe you again. Thank you, Sharon. This means a lot to us.” Steve told her politely.

“I’m keeping a list of what you owe me, Captain.” she smiled flirtatiously at him then glanced at Bucky, making her smile drop, “Ya know he kinda tried to kill me.”

“Sorry.” he sighed, “They’re going to come looking for you.”

“I know.” she said, looking away. Steve glanced at Sam who was mouthing “Kiss her! Kiss her!”

Bucky was staring at him too, making him nervous. He had to keep up appearances.

Steve kissed her briefly on the lips before pulling away and grabbing the gear from her trunk. Sam gave him a thumbs up while she wasn’t looking. Bucky seemed to be giving him a smug smile.

“That was….” she started to say. “Late. Sorry.” Steve said.

“Damn right. I should go.” Sharon smiled hazily. She waved and got back in her car. Steve put their gear in their trunk and got in the driver seat.

“Ooh she your girlfriend now?” Sam said as soon as he buckled up. He was laughing and poking at Steve's shoulder.

“No, stop.” laughed Steve, making eye contact with Bucky in the rear view mirror. He was looking over Steve and giving him his sweet smile he always used to give him..

Steve’s heart melted seeing those beautiful eyes and lips smiling back at him in the flesh.   
For the past two years Bucky had only existed in his dreams.

He tried to focus on the road as they went to a cheap motel they were staying in.

“You called Clint?” asked Sam. “Yes, he’s going to get Wanda.” said Steve.

“Who’re all these people?” asked Bucky from the back seat. “My team.” Steve replied, wondering if they were even a team anymore.

It was about dusk when they finally arrived at the two conjoined rooms they had for the night. Bucky and Steve shared a room with 2 queen beds and Sam had his own room. Sam had given Steven his cuffs outside the rooms as they were about to settle in that evening.

“Look, just ask him to put these on his hands and feet. We can’t take any chances.” he was telling Steve, handing them to him. 

“We don’t know what we will have thrown at us later.” Steve said, looking over the cuffs in his hands, “This might make him have flashbacks or something.”

“We’re just going to have to. He’ll be restrained, that is what's important. I’m beat, I’ll see you in the morning. Tell me if he even blinks funny.” Sam said, going into his room.

Steve stuffed the cuffs into his cargo pants he was wearing and went into his room. 

Bucky was watching German TV on his bed with the remote in his hand, changing the channel every 5 minutes. He was dressed in a black sweater and black pants with his long hair now clean and shiny from a recent shower. 

He nodded, “Whatcha watching, Buck?”

“Honestly, I despise television. It’s a waste of time.” Bucky admitted, setting the remote down on bedside table. He left the TV on. “Why watch then?” asked Steve, sitting across from him on his bed.

“I was just trying to keep my mind busy.” said Bucky, looking at him. 

Steve’s eyes locked on him and roamed over his body and over his metallic hand that was intertwined with his flesh hand. He never took his eyes off of him partially because he felt on guard, partially because he still didn’t believe he was real. Bucky was still handsome for being rugged and a little bruised. 

“Are you feeling okay?” asked Steve.

“You don’t have to keep asking me that.” said Bucky, shaking his head with a slight smile. 

“Sorry.” he huffed.

“I had to keep my mind busy because...I realized we haven’t spent this much time together since…” Bucky paused. “The war.” finished Steve.

Bucky’s eyes drifted to his lap, “Yeah…it makes me...jittery ya know? I remember what I did to you the last time I saw you...every night. All my winter soldier memories come to me when I dream...well, I don’t sleep much, actually.”

“I don’t either.” said Steve, “I have nightmares too.”

He looked at him, “Really?” Steve nodded. 

Bucky let out a deep breath he was holding in, “We’re both a little camp happy then huh?” he mumbled, a sad smile lingering on his lips.

Steve’s face became pained, “I really...have tried to see doctors that treat wounded veterans. I’ve consulted with people that say they can try to help me, but...no one has ever treated a hundred year old defrosted super soldier before. I just feel like I’m on another planet sometimes.” he laughed bitterly.

Bucky turned to sit across from him and put his feet on the floor. He propped himself up with his hands at his sides, “Do you think anyone would even give me a chance? I mean, if they couldn’t help you? I bet I’d be a humdinger.” he said sarcastically.

“Everyone’s different. It’s worth trying.” he replied. 

“Honestly, I am tired of people getting into my head.” Bucky said, looking down. His hair tousled softly to his shoulder. Steve couldn’t help but drink him in. He wanted to close the distance between them and scoop him into a hug. He just needed to comfort that sweet broken boy in front of him.

“What do you think is going to happen, Steve?” said Bucky softly.

Steve’s brow furrowed, “What do you mean?”

His big beautiful eyes looked back up into his, “What’s your plan? What’s the plan?”

“Well, we get our backup and meet them at the airport to get a jet. Then go find those commandos in Siberia to disable them and hopefully...we turn in the guy framed you.”

“What about Sam?” asked Bucky.

“We might have to have him for a getaway pilot. I don’t want him getting hurt.” replied Steve.

“Hmm. That’s some strategy... and you probably already have back up plans huh?” Bucky smiled. 

“Oh yeah,” smiled Steve, “I’m not only Captain America, but I’m the ‘true leader of the Avengers’ now. A lot has changed.” He jokingly acted full of himself, raising an eyebrow.

“Wow…” Bucky said, widening his eyes.

Steve smiled. 

“I thought you said your rich friend was the leader of the Avengers.” Bucky said, confused. Steve rolled his eyes, “Well usually.” 

“Has been a real fat head lately, you said.” 

Steve laughed at the term he hadn’t heard in a while, “Yes exactly.”

“Sam seems to hate me. Where did you find him?”

“The Y, actually. We just jogged and we spend time together. Then I got him put on the team. He really helped me learn about modern culture.”

“Do you trust him?” asked Bucky.

“I absolutely do.”

“He probably is suspicious of me, I kinda lost it yesterday. Makes sense, you guys became close friends. He is probably just trying to look out for you.”

Steve nodded, “Yeah that’s it. He is just unsure of you right now. He’ll come around.” 

“You’ve just been on the beam, haven’t you? I’m proud of you, Steve. You have such a nice life, and friends, and an impressive title….apparently a lady killer too huh?” added Bucky, nodding his head.

Steve’s smile dropped a bit, “Oh...not really.”

“C’mon, who was that dame you were kissing earlier? The woman who wasn’t your girlfriend?” asked Bucky.

Steve anticipated that. He wondered how long Bucky had been waiting to ask about it. “You two weren’t meant to see that...but Sharon....is a friend and she has a little thing for me, that’s all. She has helped me us so much, I have to repay her somehow.” he admitted.

“You don’t like her? She’s a dish.” Bucky scoffed.

“No...just not my type.” said Steve. 

Bucky raised his eyebrows, “What’s your type nowadays?” 

“You’re so full of questions tonight.” laughed Steve.

“I just want to catch up with an old pal, alright? I’m finally aware.” said Bucky.

“Okay, fair enough…” Steve said, “feels nice to finally sit and be still anyway....” He nodded in response. 

“So,” Bucky said happily, tilting his head, “who has been lucky enough to take out Captain America lately?” 

“Haven’t been going out…” he replied.

“All this popularity and glitz, and no one has snatched you up?” asked Bucky in disbelief, looking him over and crossing his arms.

Steve rubbed the back of his neck and laughed, “No...that hasn’t really been important to me. So much has happened with the team. I am just trying to keep going every day.” 

Bucky nodded in agreement, “Me too. It’s the small things huh? Every time I wake up and I am still aware, that’s a small victory.” 

It relieved Steve to hear that he was trying to generally stay positive and keep going. He was always stronger willed than Steve when they were kids. 

Steve was staring at the metal arm subconsciously.  
Bucky noticed and glanced down at it, “I’m inactive, Steve. It’s not going to get you, not if I can help it.”

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to stare. I’m just not used to you looking like this.” he said.

“Right? I need a haircut.” joked Bucky. He always made light of serious situations. That’s how they got through most things. 

Steve shook his head, stifling a smile. He rolled his eyes.

“C’mon, you’re so serious. Lighten up, kid.” Bucky said, putting the flesh hand on his shoulder. 

Steve sighed, “I can’t...I’ve been...up and down the past couple of days. I can’t stop thinking about everything that happened. This is how I handle things now. I….feel like I can’t shut off.”

“I get that way too. I understand.” said Bucky, patting his shoulder.

“Natasha told me I need to learn to focus on things that calm me and quiet everything else in my mind.” Steve told him.

“She a monk or something?”

“She knows a lot about meditation and she does chants. Gets the Hulk to sleep.”

“Hulk?” Bucky asked, raising an eyebrow.

“He’s a friend of mine, the guy has anger issues.” Steve replied.

“I see. What calms you then?” Bucky asked, taking his hand back. 

Steve paused and thought silently for a moment. The only thing that seemed to calm him lately was when he was “getting his rocks off”. Being intimate with Tony made him feel at peace and like he didn’t need to focus on anything else. It definitely helped him sleep at the least. Visions of Tony kissing and holding him flashed across his mind. He sighed at the chest pain that came with it.

Steve shrugged.

Bucky’s eyes flashed like he just remembered something, “Hey, do you still draw? You used to be so good at that.” He nodded, “Sure, sometimes...when I feel inspired enough.” 

Steve leaned back on his hands a little.

“I used to be your inspiration remember?” Bucky smiled.

“Is he flirting with me?” Steve thought to himself, “There is no way.”

“My mom loved that drawing you did of me in my uniform so much, she framed it in our house.” said Bucky, reaching for a water bottle on the bedside table and taking a drink.

Steve blushed, “I remember. She kept every drawing I gave her. Never had the heart to tell me no, always telling me I would be the next Edward Hopper.”

“Ma’ was your biggest fan.” Bucky said, “Besides me.” 

“Okay he knows he is flirting with me.” Steve thought to himself hopefully. 

“Man...:”Bucky shook his head, “ I missed you, Steve.” He put his bottle back on the table.

Hearing that made Steve excited, comforted, and nervous all at the same time. His lips pulled up into a smile, “I missed you too, Buck. You have no idea. I don’t think I’ve stopped thinking about you since you pulled me out of the water.” Steve admitted, then hesitantly asked “Why’d you lie to me when I asked about it?”

Bucky sighed, “I wondered when that question was coming. I get confused and scared sometimes. I really can’t trust people anymore. Those guys....they made me see you when I was locked away.”

“What do you mean?” asked Steve, listening closely.

“They gave me something that made me think I was seeing you. It was a way to get me to do things for them. It was all a trick. I barely believed you were real in my apartment.” said Bucky, tucking his hair behind one ear.

Steve’s heartache was starting to show on his face.

“I think they wanted me not to trust you anymore.” Bucky explained, “Then I lost everything, like my slate was wiped clean. When I was assigned to you I went to a museum and our pictures were all over the place. It said we were war heroes. You spoke to me on that bridge, you helped me. Little by little my memories have been coming back to me.” 

He paused, “Do you remember when I took you to the park for that USO event?” 

“How can I forget?” laughed Steve, “That night I got drunk for the first time.”

“I remember carrying you all the way home like a scrawny sack of potatoes.” laughed Buck, pointing a finger at him, “You had such a hard time going up the stairs. I had to clean you up.”

“Yeah yeah….” he scoffed, still smiling, “it wasn’t very funny from my point of view.”

“You ralphed on my uniform. I didn’t find it very funny at the time either.” smiled Bucky, shaking his head.

They settled into a comfortable silence.

“I remember bits and pieces from the war but not much. I remember seeing you for the first time….like you are now...all bigger, but that’s it.” said Bucky.

A smile spread from one side of Steve’s mouth at the way he described his appearance.

Bucky cleared his throat, “Could you fill in the blanks for me? Something the museums didn’t tell me?” 

Steve stiffened, “Uh, sure...what do you want to know?”

“I remember you saving me and seeing that red guy. I remember going back to camp, but nothing after. It’s all white.” said Bucky.

The word “white” made Steve shiver a bit. He must not remember because Steve let him drop into a snowy pit from a moving train.

“What do you remember about camp?” asked Steve.

“They let us share a tent because the quarters were full. Everyone cheered for you. That’s it.” Bucky said.

“Oh.” Steve said, letting his eyes wander around the room.

“Did we….have a fight?” asked Bucky, seemingly recalling that detail on the spot.

That question made Steve’s stomach dropped as he recalled the ancient memory, “Well….uh...not a real fight. We had a...disagreement.”

“About what? You saved me.” Bucky asked confusingly, furrowing his brows.

“It’s a long story.”

“We got time.”

Steve huffed, feeling super uncomfortable, “We went out to celebrate at the bar nearby after your unit was rescued. You and the other soldiers were heavily drinking. My friend Peggy came by to talk to me and you basically told me you hated her. I asked that you give her a chance because she helped save you.”

“Why’d I hate her? That’s ridiculous.” asked Bucky.

“You thought she may be stealing me away. You admitted that to me.” Steve told him.

Bucky looked confused but silently listened. He was always demanding and jealous.  
Steve inhaled deep, “I uh...took you back to the tent to avoid anymore rude behavior toward her.”

“Why did I think she was stealing you away?” asked Bucky.

“Because she kind of did.” revealed Steve, looking back at him, “She wanted to become involved with me. She didn’t know we were….so close. Everyone was sure you were dead but me.” He spoke carefully, searching Bucky’s face for a reaction.

Bucky took a deep breath, “ She didn’t know we were....in love?”

“It’s kind of complicated, remember Buck…” Steve said, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck and averting his eyes, “we couldn’t uh….they weren’t very accepting of that kind of then back then. Things are different now-”

“You kissed me when we got back to the tent.” said Bucky, “Right?’

Steve’s heart hammered in his chest, “Right.”

“I remember us kissing then arguing, but I stayed anyway.’ he recalled.

A memory of having sex with Bucky in that tent that night flashed in Steve’s head.

Bucky looked up at Steve and waited for him to meet his gaze.

Steve could feel his eyes on him but he stared at the odd German television show playing.

“Why did I stay?” asked Bucky sternly.

“Well, you were tired. You said you missed me…..needed body warmth, also there was nowhere else to go. You said you wanted one last night with me if I was going to run off with Peggy.” Steve said, feeling those old pent up memories hit him with old painful emotions. He to hide the feelings from showing on his face.

There were tears bubbling up above his lower lashes. Steve finally looked at him, “The next day we went on a mission. Your last mission. You...fell from a train on the side of a mountain. I tried to save you and I failed. We thought you died. It broke me.” He shook his head and sucked up a tear threatening to escape him.

Bucky’s eyes became sympathetic and concerned.

“Then uh...well, you read about what happened to me.” Steve said, smiling bitterly.

Bucky moved over to his bed suddenly. Steve scooted to make room so they were sitting side by side.

“Steve...can you...can we hug?” he said.

Steve looked him over and hesitated but nodded.

Bucky leaned over and embraced him gently but tightly.

They both sighed and breathed each other in. Steve noticed he smelled exactly the same as he used to. He closed his eyes and ran his hand down Bucky’s back.

Bucky rested his head on his shoulder as he hugged him tighter, feeling warmth spread over him for the first time in a while. Reluctantly, they pulled back from their hug and looked at each other. 

“You okay?” asked Bucky.

Steve nodded, “As okay as I can be. Are you?”

“I am now. I haven’t...touched anyone in years.” he responded.

Steve had to stop himself from looking over his body to find other places he wanted to touch him. Instead he slowly cupped his cheek with his hand.

Bucky’s eyes fluttered shut as he sighed and his metal hand embraced Steve’s.

“I hope you know you will always be safe with me.” said Steve, “I messed up once….I don’t want to ever do that again.” 

Bucky looked up at him , “I do feel safe with you, Steve. I just don’t want you to feel unsafe around ME. I’m dangerous.”

He shook his head and cupped the other side of Bucky’s face,“I don’t care what you have done. None of it matters to me. You are fine right now. You can be fine all the time, Buck. I want to help fix you and that’s what I’m going to do.”

Bucky blushed and smiled. He took in a deep breath before speaking, “Steve, I have a confession to make.”

Steve took his hands back and sat up straight, “Hm?”

“I actually keep….having these vivid memories of kissing you before bed and being so loving and protective of you...making love to you....” Bucky paused, observing that made mentioning making love made Steve bite his lip in response, “ I dream of it, the memories come to me when I hear something or I catch a familiar scent. I remember feeling like I would sacrifice everything for you. Why did I try to let you run off with someone else when I loved you so much?”

“You were not happy about it, it was a bitter agreement you forced me to make while we were arguing. You said we should try not to be...into each other anymore. We said we would go our separate ways and try to marry women, be ‘normal’ to uphold appearances. It seems so stupid now…”

Steve’s eyes darkened when he felt Bucky’s hand fall onto his thigh and squeeze.

“It seems like...I’ve been thinking about it and I could still have feelings for you….leftover. In my apartment, I kept the brochure from our museum. I kept wondering why I kept it and I realized I did it to stare at your picture on the front of it. It’s the only picture I have of you. Do you….do anything like that? Feel that way at all?” Bucky said, staring into his eyes.

He thought for a minute, “I...still draw you occasionally. You’re in my dreams almost every night too, Buck, but not all of them are good. Sometimes when I wake from them feeling upset, sketching helps me cope. I’ve missed you so much. I’m always worrying about you, knowing you were still out there. I guess...that means I may still feel for you too.” His thoughts turned to Tony and how he knew he still had feelings for him. Telling Bucky that felt like a betrayal, but he did actually have feelings leftover. He wanted to be honest. He didn’t want Bucky to ever have to be lied to again. Could it be possible to love 2 people at once? 

Bucky’s eyes glazed over and he looked down at Steve’s lips. 

He leaned in slowly toward them, needing to feel something real instead of just a memory. Steve almost let the kiss happen but backed away at the last second.

“Something wrong?” pouted Bucky.

Steve’s eyes dropped, “I just...um…this is a lot right now.”

“Are you still afraid I will hurt you?” he asked.

“No, I’m not…” 

“Do you not want...this?” Bucky asked, putting a hand on the side of his neck.

“I want it so much, but it’s not that simple.” he breathed out.

“We waited 70 years. Can’t you just let yourself have it?” said Bucky, leaning in a bit.

Steve paused at what he said. Everyone was always telling him to let himself accept things. He eyes drooped as he closed the distance between them to kiss.   
.  
Suddenly there was a vibration in Steve’s pants that made him jump back again before they made contact.

“Oh no.” said Steve. He reached in his pocket and pulled out his communicator earpiece. 

Bucky sighed, “What is it?” 

“I’m on untraceable mode but there is someone trying to reach me on the emergency line.” The led light on the earpiece glowed red. A message was attempting to come in from Tony.

“I uh...need to step outside a minute, Buck.” said Steve with a soft smile, “I’ll be right back okay?”

Bucky shook his head and looked him over, “No...I don’t know if you should go anywhere right now-”

Steve patted his shoulder, “It’s okay. I’ll be quick alright? I promise I will be right back. You just stay here. Keep the curtains closed.”

He walked out of the motel room then rounded the corner toward the ice machine. It had gotten dark outside.

He ducked between two pillars so his face wasn’t in view from the parking lot.

Steve put the piece in his ear and immediately heard Tony’s voice.

“Hey, I’m so glad you answered.” he said, sounding relieved.

Steve’s chest hurt with guilt, “Hey. No offense, but should you even be talking to me right now?”

“I’m not tracking you anyway, you turned off you tracer. This isn’t a work call. I’m worried about you. The last time we spoke was….kind of confusing and all that crazy shit went down. I wanted to make sure you were okay.” Tony said sincerely, “I wish I could come see you.”

Steve’s eyes closed, “Well, you shouldn’t risk seeing me. I’m doing okay...for a wanted fugitive.”

“You aren’t. They are still going easy on us. I...said this wasn’t a work call.”

He sighed, “Then what?”

Tony paused and forced his words out, “I’m calling to...try to talk to you as just…me. I wanted to hear your voice. In case...this doesn’t end well for us.”

“Like if we die-?”

“No like if we have to fight-”

“Oh so you are going to fight me now?” asked Steve, sighing and looking around him to make sure no one was around.

“No! I’m just….I just…” Tony groaned, “I want you to be safe.” 

“Safe from him you mean?”

“Well let’s see, he tried to kill Natasha and uh….ME.”

“He was brainwashed! I’m trying to help him. I’ve known him my whole life. He trusts me.” said Steve defensively.

“You just trust him too even though you have seen him hurt your friends in front of your face? Also didn't he shoot you? I know not much can kill you, but I don’t want him to be the thing that finally does.”

“You can’t protect me from everything…”

“I want to try!” said Tony, suppressing an angry tone.

“I know.” Steve sighed, “You just confuse protection with dictation sometimes.”

“So I’m just some kind of controlling monster huh?”

“No, no. You may lead most operations, but you can’t be the boss of everything and everyone. Some things are just beyond your control.” 

“Mhm, so basically you are too far gone for me to catch anymore? I should just stop trying with you?” asked Tony evenly.

“I told you how I’ve felt about everything. Also, I said we weren’t going to be...official for a reason. There's always going to be things in our way of being happy.” he said, feeling like a complete jerk. He was trying to get his point across that he and Tony didn’t see eye to eye, but he was subconsciously trying to close a metaphorical door before he opened a window.

“You also told me you loved me back. You were happy. I saw evidence of it.” Tony snapped, “So stop. I know what you are doing.”

Steve scoffed, “What am I doing?”

“Trying to be an asshole so I leave you alone. I invented that. You’re bad at it. What’s your problem? Is what I’m trying to do so horrible? Getting the law off our back so we can have normal lives?”

Steve didn’t reply. He felt like Tony was going to see right through every answer he gave him.

“Talk to me like an adult. It's...it’s him, isn’t it? That’s your real problem. Your old pal came back, so automatically no one else matters but him, right?” said Tony.

Steve felt hot tears roll down his cheeks. He covered his mouth to hide any noises. He didn’t want to make Tony feel this way. He didn’t want to end things via communicator.

Steve choked out, “It’s not that-”

Tony interrupted, “I...can’t compete with him, can I?” 

“Please,” Steve said weakly, wiping his tears and willing himself to keep his voice even, “I do love you, I do. We’ve been through a lot together. I told you he and I had history too. I thought I got him killed. He still protected me when I found him. I’m trying to protect him now, he’s been through enough. I can do right by him.”

“So you are what, rekindling a High School relationship, is that it? Is that why you want to fix him?” asked Tony shakily.

Steve sighed, “Don’t keep-”

“Are you...still feeling things for him?” he asked sternly.

Steve’s chest was pounding. His emotions were all at the surface. He hated feeling so many things at once.

“I can't answer that.” replied Steve. 

“Yes you fucking can. If you want, we can just...stop all this. Things can go back to how they were. Just tell me so I'm not wasting my time.”

Steve closed his eyes and felt the tears silently fall down his cheeks once more. He still didn’t give him a reply.

“I know you won’t say it. You’re too nice.” Tony said in his ear.

Steve covered his face with his palms, “I don’t want to make decisions during stressful times like this. Stop pushing me.”

“Disappoint me if you need to. You told me you loved him once. Are those old feelings bubbling up or not?” 

There was a long pause. Steve worked to even his breathing and fought to find the right words.

“Hello?” Tony asked again after a minute.

Steve uncovered his face, “I’m not sure.”

“Not good enough. Try again.”

“Maybe.”

“Got it.” Tony said bitterly.

Steve’s voice was weak, “I’m sorry. You wanted to know. I’m so confused and distracted about all of this.”

“Can’t use that excuse anymore, hun. You seemed to have figured things out enough on your own.”

Steve rubbed his temples, “I don’t know what else to tell you. I’ve been honest and upfront...out of respect for you.”

Tony sighed, “No, I know you have...you always tell the truth. That’s what I love and hate about you.” He paused and cleared his throat, “I’m uh...trying this new thing where I own up to my shortcomings more and...come to think of it, I guess...I may’ve been selfish and emotional about this whole thing. I said I wouldn’t be, and….I don’t know. I guess I was. I said I wouldn’t push you and I did...I can admit that much.”

Steve was shocked, “Are you serious?” 

There was a pause before Tony sniffed and continued speaking, “I am being serious. I’m sorry. I really wanted...I mean I still WANT you. You know that. The time we had was so important and special to me. You’re…. addictive, you know that? You make me feel…so good when I'm with you. Of course I don’t want to let you go.” said Tony, stumbling over his words.

More tears rolled off Steve’s face as he spoke softly, “I don’t want to let you go either, believe me. You deserve so much better, you deserve….happiness.”

“Oh God dammit.” whispered Tony, sounding like he was cursing at himself to stop crying.

Steve waited for him to compose himself and wiped his own tears away. 

“You alright?” asked Steve.

“Not really.” Tony said, “But maybe....I um….can be with some time.”

“So...we're…?” Steve said hesitantly. 

“We're going our separate ways? Yea...I guess.” Tony said in his most even voice he could force out.

Steve's whole stomach twisted, “Um... I’ve never done this before. If-” he paused to hold back a sob, “If you are sure this is what you want, I can...respect that.”

He was covering his face, trying to supress more tears from coming.

There was a beeping noise in the background that sounded like his private jet about to land. Tony sniffed, “Look, I’ll let you go. I’m glad...I got to hear your voice. Um...take care of yourself, old man.”

“You too.” Steve said before he heard him disconnect.

He stared into the night sky in disbelief for a minute to compose himself. So this thing was really over?

Steve looked towards the motel room that contained Bucky waiting for him. His heart hammered in his chest. The devastation washed over him as he drug his feet and walked back to the room.

When he got to the door he wiped his face and took a few deep breaths before going back in. 

Bucky was still sitting on Steve's bed, “Everything okay?” He asked.

Steve shuffled over to sit back down next to him, “Technically.”

“Should we leave?” Asked Bucky nervously. 

“No it's nothing like that, Buck. We're fine.” said Steve, kicking his shoes off. He couldn’t wipe the grim look off of his face.

“You seem upset. What happened?” Bucky said, noticing the redness in his eyes and the bags forming under his eyes.

Steve sat back against the headboard and stared at his lap, “I just took a phone call.”

“From who?”

“Tony.”

“Your fat head friend? He tell you to turn me in?” asked Bucky.

Steve looked up with heavy lidded eyes and shook his head, “No. We didn’t discuss that.”

Bucky scooted over to sit by his side, “You...want to talk about it?”

Steve crossed his arms, “No...it’s stupid. It’s not...important.” His heartbeat sped up when he felt Bucky’s arm wrap around his shoulders but he relaxed a bit into him.

“Seems important. You’re tensed up and you look...so sad, Steve. What’s going on?” said Bucky, looking over at him and rubbing his shoulder with the hand wrapped around him.

Steve closed his eyes and breathed deeply to himself. He didn’t think he should tell Bucky anything about him Tony. He tried to come up with a lie to give him but couldn’t.

“C’mon.” urged Bucky softly, tipping his head over to rest on Steve’s shoulder.

Eyes opening, Steve just stared ahead at the TV, “I just don’t think he and I are going to be friends anymore after all this is over that’s all. We just….aren’t on the same train anymore.” He decided vagueness was okay for now.

Bucky breathed him in, “You guys were really close then?”

Steve ignored the urge to wrap his arms around Bucky’s waist and he kept them crossed.

“Yeah, especially in the last year. I didn’t expect our friendship to end so quickly.” he replied.

Bucky took his arm back from around Steve and ran it down to rest on his own thigh, “Did I ruin it?”

Steve looked at him, “No, you didn’t do all this. You were framed. He doesn’t understand that.”

Bucky’s eyes shifted and he looked down at his lap, “I just...kind of feel like a ticking bomb. All I do is ruin everything and take good things from people.”

“No no…” Steve said, uncrossing his arms and turning to face him, “Listen, this whole fight with me and Tony started before I came to get you, okay? I came to find you because it was my choice. He wanted to deny my right to choose. I couldn’t have that. I knew something wasn’t right, so I ignored his warnings.” 

Bucky smiled at him a little, “That sounds like old Steve alright…”

Steve’s body finally relaxed a bit, “Well I am glad I did.”

Bucky’s hint of a smile dropped. They stared at each other for a minute. Steve could stare into his blue eyes all night, they were so beautiful.

Bucky cleared his throat, “You are?”

“I got to you before the other guys didn’t I?” Steve said, smiling for a second.

Bucky looked touched by his words. He bit his lip and looked over Steve’s face.

Steve could see the passion return to his eyes. He sat back a bit and turned to face straight ahead. He tried to stay calm and not let his emotions make him do stupid things. (Like when he kissed Sharon after barely knowing her from across the hall.)

Bucky inhaled to speak when there were 3 brief knocks on the door, making him pause and bolt to his bed in a defensive pose. 

Steve stood, “It’s okay, that’s the secret knock. It’s Sam.”

Steve got up and check it was him through the peephole then let him in.

“How’s things?” asked Sam as he entered and attempted to give Bucky a smile.

“Fine.” said Steve, shrugging. Bucky loosened up into a seated position on his bed. He started flipping through the channels on TV again.

“So um, I got a call from Tony.” said Sam softly.

“I did too.” said Steve, nodding.

“He give you one more chance to ‘make the right choice’ too?” he asked.

“Y-yeah pretty much.” Steve said, rolling his eyes.

“Man, this dude doesn’t quit, does he?”

“Not that I recall.” 

Sam’s eyes shifted awkwardly over at Bucky. He whispered, “Everything cool with-”

Steve nodded, “Fine, just fine.” he also whispered.

Sam gave him one last shifty eye, “Alright...I’m actually going to bed this time. Holler if you need me. Do the knock on the wall-”

“Okay!” laughed Steve. Sam waved as he walked out the door “I’ll see ya.”  
Steve sat at the edge of his bed and leaned forward on his knees. He tried to steer his thoughts away from Tony and stared at the floor, listening to the German TV gibberish once again. 

Bucky looked at his muscular back and hanging head, worrying about the state of his friend. He kept trying to ask for permission to show him affection. He just wanted to help and make him feel better but touching him seem to make him jumpy and tense.

He gave up and told him, “I think I would like to try and get some rest now, Steve.”

Steve sat up straight and turned to him, “Oh yeah? I guess I could try and sleep too.” 

Bucky stood and took off his shirt and threw it to the floor. He started pulling all the blankets back on his bed.

Steve gulped at his ripped chest and sculpted ass and the way the metal arm was attached to him. Suddenly he remembered the handcuffs Sam suggested he use. “Uh, hey Buck?” he said timidly.

Bucky arranged his pillows, “Yeah?”

“I need to sleep with the TV on, if you don’t mind.” said Steve.

“Alright.”

“Also, just as a precaution, I think I should cuff you.”

That made Bucky turn to him looking confused, “What?”

Steve sighed and reached into his pocket to pull out the handcuffs, “I just don’t want you switching on me overnight. I wouldn’t know how to handle you. We can’t fight you back down. I’m sorry. They aren’t really uncomfortable and it would just make me feel better.”

Bucky rolled his eyes but he nodded, “Okay.”

“Okay?” he asked, confused.

“If you would feel better that I do that just in case, it’s fine with me. I understand. I trust you.”

Steve gave him a thankful look. Bucky slid into his bed under a thin sheet, “You got to fasten me in. How do they work?”

Steve stood and came toward him with the cuffs open, “It’s robotic armour. It can clamp onto anything so you can have slack while you sleep.”

Bucky laid back on his left side so he was facing Steve’s bed, “Okay, I’m ready.” he held his wrists together toward him to make it easier.

Steve hovered over him a little to clamp the cuffs to the bed and wall. Bucky licked his lips as he looked up at him and smelled his musk. Finally he felt Steve click the cuffs around his wrists. They tightened automatically, making him gasp.

Steve was still hovering over him as he gave him a reassuring look.

Bucky smiled, “Goodnight, Steve.” He didn’t move right away, so Bucky fluidly lifted his head up to kiss Steve’s lips. He broke the kiss and slowly laid right back down on his pillow, waiting for Steve’s reaction.

There was a deep blush coming over Steve’s face and he was stifling a smile.

He leaned back down and kissed Bucky again, making him grunted in surprise but smile into the kiss.

Steve was also smiling as he pulled back a little, “Goodnight, Buck.” He turned the lamp off and turned to his own bed to pull the blankets back. He took off his shirt and his cargo pants.

Bucky stared at his muscular ass and his chiseled back in the dim TV light.

Steve laid down in bed and glanced over only to catch him staring. He smirked as he closed his eyes and tried to get some rest.

A few hours into the night, Steve awoke to a weird noise coming from behind him. He rolled over to look at Bucky who was groaning in his sleep and yanking against his restraints.

He peered at his face in the dim light to make sure he was still asleep. Steve got up and kneeled down on the floor next to him. Bucky sounded like he was having a nightmare.

“Buck.” he whispered, “Hey, Buck.” 

Bucky’s head was jolting left and right as he grunted and whimpered.

Steve gently reached out and rubbed his shoulder, “Bucky, come back to me.” he said a little louder.

Bucky jolted awake with tears in his eyes and seemed scared and confused at first, “Steve? Are...are you really here?”

“Yes it’s me, I'm here. You were just dreaming.” said Steve softly, stroking his arm.

Bucky looked down at his hand cuffs panting, “Oh. S-Sorry I woke you. You can leave me be.”

Steve hooked a finger around his chin and tilted his head back up, “You sure?”

“I’m sure.” said Bucky, smiling through his tears. Steve wiped the tears from his cheeks. 

“Is there anything I can do?” asked Steve.

Bucky shook his head against his pillow. He swallowed deeply slowing his breathing, “I just go back to sleep and try again. That’s all I can do.”

Steve was pouting and staring into his glossy eyes, his face only being lit from the glow of the TV.

“Really, Steve. I’ll be fine, just go back to bed.” repeated Bucky, sniffing.

Steve didn’t say anything, he just reacted the way Buck used to when HE was upset. He stood and slowly climbed into bed behind him. 

“What’re you doing? N-no you don't have t-” Bucky said weakly.

He hushed when Steve wrapped his arms around him and spooned him from behind. 

Steve heard him breath a little deeper when he felt his chest press against Bucky's shirtless back. 

Eventually Bucky's sniffing stopped and they both drifted off to sleep.

When dawn came, Bucky woke up first. He looked down at the muscular arm still clutched over his chest and sighed. 

As he peered over his shoulder he could see Steve's angelic face still snoring.

Bucky didn’t want to wake him, but his wrists ached from the cuffs. He started to say softly over his shoulder, “Steve? Steve! Wake up.”

Steve shuffled and sighed with his eyes closed, “Hmm? Tony?” he mumbled.

“Steve wake up.” He repeated.

Steve startled himself awake, “What?”

“Hey, want to get me out of these? I got to piss.” Buck smiled, nodding down the cuffs.

Steve took his arm back and looked toward the window to see the sun was starting to come up. He slowly propped up on his hands and knees to unfasten him. 

Immediately Bucky ran to the bathroom. Steve looked down to find he was painfully hard and rolled over to face the wall and tried to wish it away. 

It wasn't a normal morning wood situation, he was hard because of who he woke up next to and the position he had to get in to take off the cuffs. 

A smiling Bucky with bed head re-emerged from the bathroom. He cocked his head at Steve looking uncomfortably at the wall. 

“Do we need to wake Sam and leave right away to get ‘the team’?” He asked.

“We got a little time. We don't pick up them for a few hours.” Replied Steve, keeping his eyes closed.

Bucky climbed onto the foot of the bed, “You still tired?” 

“I'm waking up, just give me a minute.”

Bucky climbed up next to him and sat against the headboard,“I didn't have anymore nightmares last night after you got in bed….thank you.”

Steve composed himself enough to turn over toward him. He sat up and faced him, still shirtless and covered by the blanket, “Of Course You used to do it for me.”

Bucky’s eyes met his, “You make me feel….like I’m back home again.”

There was a smile playing at the corners of Steve’s mouth. 

“You even smell the same as you used to.” said Bucky.

“You remember how I smelled?” asked Steve.

“It’s definitely familiar. I remember loving how you smelled. Since you got all super it’s almost more intense.” he responded, looking away.

Steve scooted closer to him, “Is that bad?”

Bucky shook his head, “Not at all. It’s-” he looked up at him, “It’s comforting.” 

Steve noticed his eyes wandering down over his body again. “I’m glad, Buck.” he said, snapping him out of his trance.

Bucky looked down at his lap, “I just can’t believe how okay with physical contact I am. Usually people scare me, especially if they touch me.”

“But it’s me.” said Steve, sitting against the wall, he took the opportunity to check out Bucky’s muscular thighs as he still was just in his underwear..

“You almost cure me with your presence I guess.” he smiled, looking back up at him.

They smiled at each other. After a minute, Bucky just scooted over and cuddled up to Steve’s chest.

Steve’s arms opened instinctively as he was hugged and looked a little confused at him.

Bucky closed his eyes and hugged Steve tight, “I just thought I would take advantage of this in case we don’t get another chance.”

He pouted, “Why wouldn’t we get another chance, Buck?”

“They might find me and take me again.” whispered Bucky.

Steve shook his head and hugged him against his chest, “I’m not going to let that happen. I told you. You will always be safe with me.”

That spread warmth through Bucky’s body. He smiled against Steve’s chest.

“I admire your never ending optimism, but if they come for me again with a fleet bigger than ours-” Bucky said, but Steve pulled his face up to his to shut him up with his kiss.

When he pulled back Steve told him, “You said you want to take advantage of this? Let’s not think about what is going to happen later. Let’s have the morning to ourselves.” He realized as he said it that it was similar to something Tony had told him a while back. Steve pushed all the negative thoughts out of Tony and the government out his mind. He really did want serenity before possible battle.

Bucky nodded and pulled him to lay down on his back so he could lay on top of his chest.

Steve heard him groan pleasantly and was suddenly very aware they were both still in their underwear. He felt like there were butterflies in his stomach. Bucky made Steve feel so nervous, like when he used to be smaller.

Even though they cuddled all night, he still felt like it was different since he was awake and aware.

Steve rubbed his back and heard him moan into his chest. It was like sweet music to his ears. The world was put on pause. 

After an hour or so, Steve sat up a little against his pillows. Bucky shuffled since he had fallen back asleep. He looked up at him and rubbed his eyes, “What time is it?”

Steve looked at his watch, “Still early. Sam might wake up soon though. We probably should eat something before we leave.”

Bucky hugged him again. “C’mon,” Steve laughed as he felt Bucky’s face in his neck, “you didn’t get enough by now?”

“It will never be enough.” he replied.  
Steve closed his eyes and hugged him tightly with a groan. He agreed with him. They had a plan but they honestly didn’t know what was waiting for them on the other side. Steve was so scared of getting Bucky hurt or losing him again.

Eventually Sam woke up and gathered the two super soldiers. They went for breakfast and picked up Scott.

When they arrived at the airport for the jet, they discovered some familiar faces and all hell broke loose.

 

..................................


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The fights, the drama, a sexy bath....

hapter 7:

Tony, Rhodey, T’Challa, Natasha, and Steve stood in front of the helicopter he was supposed to escape in. 

Tony stared at Steve with such intensity as he spoke to a man he still loved. His black eye from the fight a day before was prominent as he still continued to try and talk sense into Steve, “Ross gave me 36 hours to bring you in. That was 24 hours ago, can you help me out?”

Steve stood firmly, staring into Tony’s eyes, “You’re after the wrong guy.”

“Your judgment is askew.” said Tony sadly, “Your old war buddy killed innocent people yesterday-”

“There are more super soldiers just like him.” interrupted Steve, “I can’t let the doctor find them first, Tony. I can’t.”

“You know what’s about to happen, Steve.” said Natasha, “You really want to punch your way out of this one?”

“Alright, I’ve run out of patience.” said Tony as he called Spiderman and he stole Cap’s shield and bounded his hands. Spiderman started to ramble but was cut off by Tony. 

“You’ve been busy.” said Steve cockily.

He was fuming at Steve but tried to hold back as he spoke, “And you’ve been a complete idiot!”

Natasha was surprised by his outburst a little, wondering if he was going to expose himself too much while he felt this emotional.

“Dragging in Clint.” continued Tony, “‘Rescuing’ Wanda she doesn’t want to leave that is SAFE. I’m trying to keep….” he huffed, “I’m trying to keep you from tearing the Avengers apart.”

“You did that when you signed.” Steve said calmly, growing tired of his lectures.

Tony paused in disbelief then became angrier. “Alright, we’re done.” he said, raising his voice, “You’re gonna turn Barnes over and come with us NOW! Because it’s US. Or just a squad of JSOC guys with no compunction about being impolite.”  
Steve looked away for a minute.

Tony stared at his masked face, “C’mon.” He silently pleaded to the stubborn man he still loved. Tony’s chest felt tight as he nervously waited for a response. He just wanted all this to be over.

“We found their quinjet.” said Sam into Steve’s earpiece. 

The fight started. It was a chaotic scene of kicks, punches and blasters.

After a while of non stop combat, Bucky and Steve managed to take cover off the runway.

“That guy is probably to Siberia by now.” Bucky said to Steve hiding behind a plane.

“We got to draw out the flyers.” Steve said, “I’ll take vision, you get to the jet.”

Sam was flying and being chased by War Machine, “Get to the jet!” he said in the headset, “Both of you! The rest of us aren’t getting out of here.”

Clint interjected into the communicator, “Hate to admit it, but to win this one some of us are going to have to lose it.”

“This isn’t the real fight, Steve.” Sam said into their headsets.

Steve and Bucky exchanged a look. Steve nodded, “Alright Sam, what’s the plan?”

“A diversion, something big.” said Sam.

Ant-Man got huge and distracted everyone long enough for Steve and Bucky to run for it and make their escape, narrowly avoiding a tower being dropped on them. Natasha helped them by shocking T’Challa into submission. 

As Steve was flying away, Rhodey chased after them and was shot down accidentally by Vision.

Tony flew down to him but couldn’t catch him as he crashed to the earth. He checked his vitals, panicking. Sam flew down to them and apologized but was blasted back by Tony.

Tony’s mind was racing as he worried about Rhodey and looked toward the distant dot that was Steve flying away with his new/old partner. He thought about how he knew it was really over now. There was a battle and he gave Steve another chance to come back to him and he chose Barnes over him again.   
\----------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

The quinjet was then flying quietly over the mountain tops.

Steve had taken off his mask and was deep in thought as they started their 9 hour journey to find Zemo and the other soldiers. 

He was worrying about everyone he dragged into his “side” of the fight. He kept second guessing his decisions then reassuring himself over and over. 

The image of Tony’s saddened bruised face appeared in his head. He had only ever seen that look during particularly hard missions. (Like when he basically died in New York.) The guilt from hurting Tony that much was taking him over.

“What’s going to happen to your friends?” asked Bucky behind him, snapping him out of his thoughts.

Steve paused grimly and shook his head, “Whatever it is, I will deal with it.” His brows were furrowed.

Bucky could tell Steve was more upset by his own actions than anything that had happened. 

“I don’t know if I’m worth all this, Steve.” he said thoughtfully.

He looked back at him, “What you did all those years, it wasn’t you. You didn’t have a choice. I told you.”

“I know. I still did it.” said Bucky.

Steve looked sad and turned back to the windshield of the jet.

“Tony seemed so relentlessly angry.” said Bucky, “I gave him that black eye, and he mentioned more casualties when I was triggered. I understand why he hates me. He was so mad at you though. Why can’t he let it go? You two never disagree before?”

“We have had...many disagreements.” Steve sighed, staring ahead.

“He was such a hot head. I didn’t want to really fight anyone though.” said Bucky.

“It’s okay. He is just mad at me. Also the whole government isn’t exactly chanting my praises lately.” Steve said. 

“Join the club.” mumbled Bucky.

“Admittedly, I’ve been doing the opposite of what Tony’s suggested as a leader and it really winds him up. He feels like I’m ripping the team apart.” added Steve.

There was silence again.

Cap put the jet on autopilot and went to sit in the seat across from him,“I’m going to have to be honest with you, Buck. He isn’t only mad at you because of what you did or the….bombing.” 

Bucky furrowed his brows, “Why else would he hate me?”

“He...We….” Steve looked out the window feeling embarrassed, “Tony and I were...involved.”

Bucky’s face lit up with surprise, “Really?” 

“Yeah...we didn’t mean for it to happen. It just did.” he blushed. Steve really didn’t want to tell him, but honesty was more important than ever.

“So what does that mean?” Bucky asked, tilting his head. He felt a twinge of jealousy.

“When I said we were probably ending our friendship, we were actually ending...our involvement with each other. So, I’m sure he is feeling a lot of different things right now, none of them good.”

“He knows you are just trying to protect me because I’m innocent and we have an old bond, right?” asked Bucky.

Steve looked down, “Not exactly. A while back I….told him all about you from the past when I was worried about you. Told him about my dreams.”

Bucky nodded, “Ah...So he is feeling all these things, and jealousy and bitterness are probably a few of them. Am I right?”

Steve nodded back.

He sighed, “Alright. I will keep that in mind.”  
Steve looked at him again finally, “I’m sorry.”

“Why?”

“I didn’t tell you last night when you asked.”

“We both have gotten scared to open up the past few days. It’s okay, Steve.” said Bucky softly, looking him over.

“I’m just….getting over it.” he said, clearing his throat.

Bucky’s eyes narrowed, “You two were serious?”

Steve looked sad, “I…” his turned to look toward the pilot screen, “I guess.”

“So you guys were….shacking up together?” 

A tear escaped Steve’s eye and fell down his cheek. He sat it drip onto his sleeve, avoiding eye contact. He didn’t want to answer that question.

Bucky examined his sad gorgeous face again, “Am I being too nosey? I’m sorry.”

Steve shook his head, “I’ve really not been acting like myself recently. I don’t want you to think any less of me.”

“What?” scoffed Bucky, “No...not at all. It’s okay, Steve. I went and shacked up with plenty of dames when we were younger. You never got to do that. You’re a grown man. Do whatever you want.” 

Steve took a deep breath and shook his fingers through his hair, staring down in defeat.

“You’re too hard on yourself.” said Bucky.  
“Not hard enough apparently.” mumbled Steve.

“Look, I know you got this ‘good boy’ reputation to protect, but that’s not important anymore. At least not with me. Definitely not right now.” Bucky told him.

Steve looked back at him and nodded slowly. 

Bucky offered him a smile, “You’re still always the same Steve to me.”

That made him feel a little better, although he knew he shouldn’t be worried about his feelings at that moment.

There was silence for a few minutes except for the whooshing of the wind around the jet.

Steve looked him over, “Are you...going to be okay?”

“I’m anxious, I’ll admit.” Bucky said, still smiling uncomfortably. He was trying not to worry Steve too much so he tried to keep his expressions light.

“If he’s there, I’m not going to let him get to you again, Buck. I promise.” he said sternly in a protective tone.

“Come to think of it, I should have picked up some ear plugs at that airport, huh?” said Bucky.

Steve shook his head, “You don’t have to joke. It’s okay to be scared.”

“Just promise me if he triggers me again….you’ll get the hell out of there.” said Bucky.

“No way. I’ll knock you out before I leave without you.”

“Oh you think you can knock me out huh?” smiled Bucky.

Steve rolled his eyes and smirked.

“I just don’t want to hurt you again. I don’t think I could get past it if I did. Not this time.” Bucky said and fidgeted in his seat.

The smirk completely vanished from Steve’s face. 

They stared at each other stone faced for a minute, then Steve stood up and kneeled in front of Bucky.

Bucky uncrossed his arms and Steve scooted between his legs and hugged him, closing his eyes.

“We’re going to take care of this. We are both going to walk away from it….together.” said Steve at almost a whisper.

Bucky held him tightly against his chest. 

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------

MEANWHILE (during the 9 hour flight)

Tony was in the Hospital where Rhodes was being scanned and treated. He had a stern talk with Vision. The conversation seemed a little stupid. Tony realized as he walked away from the scanning room that Vision is not a person. He has no idea how to be human or have compassion or guilt.

Tony looked down at the sling on his left arm and sighed as he sped up his pace to leave the Hospital.

His car picked him up out back and FRIDAY drove him to the Avengers compound. Natasha was standing on the balcony when he pulled up. Every Avenger besides her was locked up or AWOL.

She had some nerve showing her face here. Tony tore off his sunglass when he got out of the car. Ofcourse she noticed him and ushered him to come up to her.

He took the elevator up the living quarters and joined her on the balcony.

He decided to speak first, “The doctors say he shattered L4 through S1. Laceration on the spinal cord. Looking at paralysis.”

Natasha looked concerned, “Steve’s not gonna stop. If you don’t either, Rhodey will be best case scenario.”

Tony pointed at her, “You let them go.”

“We played this wrong.” she said.

“WE huh? Must be hard to shake the whole double agent thing. Must stick in the DNA.” Tony said smugly.

“Are you capable of letting of your ego or emotions for a goddamn second?” asked Natasha, frustrated.

“T’Challa told Ross what you did. They’ll be coming for you.” he said.

“I figured. I’m not worried about that.” she said, “You need to figure out if you are really fighting the right fight. Also I’m not the one who needs to watch their back.” Natasha stormed off.

Tony stood staring off at the trees considering what she said.

He started to come up with a plan, and called his chopper. He flew to the prison where they were holding the Avengers to get coordinates from Sam. He was going to find Steve and find out the truth.

After getting a location, FRIDAY’s search she ran showed that Zemo was in fact responsible for the current attacks. All this time, Steve was telling the truth.

Tony felt like an idiot. He loved that man and knew how honest he was, but he thought Steve was just blinded by the presence of an old familiar face. He needed to join them to help them bring Zemo in and pay for his crimes.

Even if it was going to be painful to help Steve after all the fighting they had done, he knew he had to. He had to try and be the better man and own up to his mistakes and ignore his ego.

Suddenly Tony pressed a button that pushed him back into his suit and he blasted away toward Siberia.

Little did he know T’Challa was following close behind.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

LATER

Steve and Bucky landed on a snowy mountain with a cave type entrance tucked into it.

They stood as the ramp started to slowly lower down for them. They shared a memory about a girl Bucky was trying to date back when they were teenagers.

“She must be 100 years old.” said Bucky.

“So are we, pal.” said Steve, putting his hand on his shoulder.

The ramp clunked to the ground. 

Bucky put his hand on Steve’s and pulled him closer for a hug. Bucky cupped the back of his neck and let his lips briefly graze his cheek. Steve closed his eyes and rubbed his back a little before pulling apart from him and putting on his mask.

They walked out to the entrance of the facility.

“He can’t have been here more than a few hours.” said Steve.

“Long enough to wake them up.” said Bucky, grabbing his gun.

They went into the bunker with Cap leading the way. They found a caged elevator and started it down.

Steve stood there across from Bucky, holding his shield, staring into his eyes. All Bucky’s anxious feelings seemed a little less extreme as they shared a silence. 

Cap’s adrenaline was going, but his face remained calm. He mentally prepared himself for battle once again.

The elevator came to a stop and the doors slid open. 

Bucky let out a deep breath, making Steve nod at him. He pulled up the cage door. They made their way through a hallway and around a corner. Then there was a loud bang.

Cap readied his shield, “You ready?”

“Yeah.” said Bucky, readying his gun. Suddenly, Iron Man appeared before them, forcing an entrance open for himself. 

Tony stood in front of them and his helmet went back to expose his face, “Seem defensive.”

Steve came toward him but didn’t put his shield down, “Been a long day.”

“At ease, Soldier. I’m not after you.” admitted Tony.

“Then why are you here?” asked Steve.

“I believe your story, maybe. Ross doesn’t know I’m here. I don’t want him to. Otherwise, I have to arrest myself.” he joked.

His light hearted comment made Steve feel a little more trusting. “That sounds like a lot of paperwork.” Steve said, lowering his shield. He seemed to finally understand. He seemed to be there as a friend. Steve was going to hug him, but held back, “It’s good to see you, Tony.”

“You too, Cap.” said Tony, keeping it formal in front of the new guy. He looked over at Bucky, “Hey, Manchurian Candidate, you’re killing me. There’s a truce, here. Drop the…”

Steve turned to him and nodded. Bucky lowered his weapon. Tony DID seem to have had a moment of clarity and calmed down a lot in the past 9 hours.

Tony dropped his Iron Man helmet back on his face as they made their way into the bunker.

He scanned the room of capsules, “I got heat signatures.” Tony said through the armor.

“How many?” asked Cap.  
“Uh….one.” answered Tony.

Bucky shuddered behind them and lifted his weapon again as they made their way into the room and looked around at all the super soldier corpses, shot in the head. 

Zemo’s voice echoed in the room over a microphone, “Did you really think I wanted more of you?”

Bucky looked at the corpses closer, “The hell?”

Tony and Steve became defensive.

They finally saw him from the control room, “I am grateful to them though, they brought you here.”

Cap threw his shield at the control room window only to do no damage to it.

“Please Captain,” Zemo scoffed, “This room is built to withstand UR 100 rockets.”

“I could beat that.” said Tony.

“Sure you could, Mr.Stark.” said Zemo, looking down at the three of them happily, “then you’d never know why you came here.”

“You killed innocent just to bring us here?” asked Steve.

“I studied you for years followed you.” Zemo told him.

“You’re Sokovian. Is that what this is about?” Steve said.

“Sokovia was in a bad state before you blew it to hell.” said Zemo, “No, I’m here because I made a promise.”

Steve squinted up at him, “You lost someone?”

Zemo clicked his tongue angrily, “I lost everyone. So will you.”

A screen turned on near the three of them and played surveillance footage of a particular date. 

Steve moved closer to the screen as Zemo continued to tell them their empire would crumble from within. 

Tony moved closer to the screen, “I know this road. What is this?”

The footage showed Bucky had killed Tony’s parents. Tony watched uneasily and glanced back and forth from the screen to Bucky. 

Steve stared at Tony’s face nervously.. He wasn’t ever supposed to know. Especially not like this. He was panicking internally, trying think of ways to diffuse the situation. Tony immediately lunged toward Bucky.

“Tony, tony…” Steve said defensively, trying to hold him back from the soldier.

Tony immediately became overwhelmed with emotion and started to tear up. He turned to Steve in sad disbelief, “Did you know?” They loved each other. There was no way Steve would have held something like this from him. He always told the truth...didn’t he? This was his last chance to come clean.

Steve paused in fear and panicked, “I…I didn’t know it was him.”

Tony felt the anger building as he continued to lie to him. “Don’t bullshit me, Rogers! Did you know?!” he said, lowering his voice with his words coming out harsh. 

Steve noticed the change in his tone and that he called him “Rogers”. His stomach knotted. He was caught. 

Bucky nervously held his gun ready.

Steve was silent a few seconds, trying to hold back tears before finally spitting out, “Yes.” 

He pushed Steve backwards slightly. The grief and anger consumed Tony more than Steve had ever seen. He felt as if Steve could keep this from him this whole time, that made their relationship a lie. 

Out of rage, Tony’s helmet went back over his face as he punched Steve to the ground. Bucky fired, but his shots were deflected and he was disarmed. 

“Don’t make me do this, don’t make me do this.” Steve thought to himself, watching them.

Tony went straight to fight Bucky and blasted him across the room to pin him down. 

Steve shot up and threw his shield against Iron Man’s helmet to distract him. He blasted some of those legendary robotic restraints onto Steve’s legs and went right back to attacking Bucky.

Steve panicked and banged his shield into the restraints as Tony kept trying to put his iron fist through Bucky’s skull. Tony wasn’t thinking about accords or repercussions any longer. 

None of that mattered to him. Bucky didn’t deserve to live at this point. He had taken too much from people all over the world to still be able to exist in it.

Steve finally broke through his restraints and ran toward them. Part of the supports in the bunker collapse, some onto Iron Man.

Bucky popped up between the rubble, untouched.

Steve made eye contact with him, “Get out of here!” he yelled.

Bucky tried running but Tony needed to finish this fight and kept walking toward him. “It wasn’t him, Tony!” Steve stood in his way, “Hydra had control of his mind.”

“Move!” demanded Tony, flying toward him. Cap grabbed his suit by the foot and banged on it with his shield to try and stop him. Tony was annoyed. He didn’t want to fight Steve again.

Ironman blocked Steve out of the tower entrance, or so he thought, and chased Bucky up as he climbed up the platforms on the walls of the tower. Steve got up there fast enough to shield his blast away from Bucky on a platform.

“He’s not going to stop.” Steve told Bucky, “GO.”

He trapped Tony with a grapple and took him out of the air down to a lower platform. 

Ironman blasted Bucky down to him and caught him in a chokehold from behind. “Do you even remember them?” Tony sneered into Bucky’s ear.

“I remember all of them.” Bucky replied. The three of them fell down to the ground floor and continued to fight.

None of them slowed down or hesitated until Tony blasted off Bucky’s metal arm.

Steve couldn’t take it anymore and attacked at Tony faster and harder than he ever had. He just needed to incapacitate him. Bucky stayed on his back, in pain from being blasted.

Tears kept clouding his eyes as they fought. This was ripping Steve apart.

Tony kept trying to get to Bucky as Steve punched him and he finally got Steve to his knees.

When he looked up, he was bloody faced and breathless, “He’s my friend!”

“So was I.” replied Tony.

“This isn’t going to bring them back.” said Steve.

Tony kept coming toward him. “It’s not going to get me back either.” Steve added.

Tony’s expression hardened and he punched Steve a few more times before throwing him aside. “Stay down, final warning.” he told Cap.

Steve slowly but surely got back up and told him he could fight all day. Bucky grabbed Tony’s foot to catch him off guard and Cap finally incapacitated him with a shield to the chest.

Bucky was barely conscious as Steve pulled him to his feet, bracing his arm around his shoulder to walk him out. As they turned to leave, Tony shouted at him that he didn’t deserve the shield that Howard Stark made him.

So he dropped it and walked out.

Tony immediately succumbed to his tears as he lay there bloody and in pain. He had so many thoughts running through his mind but ultimately he knew he was never going to see Steve again. He was lost forever.

Steve walked Bucky outside slowly but steadily. “You want me to pick you up?” asked Steve, noticing his limp. They made their way toward the quinjet.

“No, it’s okay.” grunted Bucky, “What’s he doing here?”

Steve followed his gaze and noticed Black Panther standing there next to a jet of his own.

He sighed as they neared him. Prince T’Challa put his hands up defensively, “I come in peace.” he said in his thick Wakandan accent.

Steve and Bucky paused. 

“I have Zemo.” said T’Challa, “He is knocked out in my jet. Can we have a discussion in your plane out of the snow, Captain?”

Cap looked at Bucky, breathing heavy as the snowy wind howled around them. He nodded and the three of them went into the quinjet.

Steve brought Bucky up the ramp and kicked a button in the wall of the jet. A table started to rise from the floor. He laid Bucky down gently on it. 

T’Challa crossed his arms, “I can offer Sergeant Barnes refuge in my country. The government doesn’t know about us and our resources yet. No one even breaks our airspace. He will be protected there.”

“Why would you do that?” groaned Bucky, looking up at the roof of the jet.

“To apologize.” he admitted.

Steve closed the ramp to the jet and stood next to Bucky and held his unhurt arm softly. 

Bucky exhaled slowly, “Apologize huh?”

T’Challa nodded, “The people in power are going to be searching for the both of you. My sister is very good at fixing these types of things.” he gestured one hand toward what was left of Bucky’s metal arm, “We have very fine facilities. It is the least I can do for trying to hurt you due to my thoughtlessness. Now, we don’t know have much time, so may I suggest we take off? My jet will automatically follow us if we go to Wakanda right now. I will turn in Zemo to the proper authorities myself.”

Bucky looked over at him slowly and nodded, “Thank you. Okay, let’s go to Wakanda.”

Steve nodded at him also, “I will set us off.” He went to the control panel and fired up the jet. T’Challa punched a few buttons on his wrist of his suit to get the jet to follow. The three of them flew off.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
At some point, Tony finally got “home” to the Avengers compound. There weren’t many Avengers left out of jail so the whole living space was fairly empty except Vision.

Tony went straight to his medical lady on staff to be checked out before dragging his feet to the elevator and heading down to his lab/office with a fancy couch bed.

He was in casual sweats as he slowly made his way to the couch and laid down. It felt good to finally be calm and still. He had tended to his wounds on the surface but the emotional wounds of his parents’ death was still open and fresh and hurting.

Tony sighed and reached under the couch for his stash box. He rolled a joint and lit it.

“FRIDAY.” he said aloud, getting her attention.

“Yes sir?” his A.I. asked over the intercom. 

“No calls, no visitors. I want to be left alone.” he said.

“Even your starred contacts sir?” FRIDAY asked.

“Especially them.” he said, exhaling smoke. She was talking about his two special contacts: Steve and Pepper.

“Yes sir.” she said.

Tony stared up at the ceiling of his lab, “FRIDAY, Could you play The Smiths? Soft volume please.”

She started to play “Asleep”. 

It reminded him of a time where he played The Smiths for Steve for the first time. 

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Tony and Steve were sitting on the couch in Steve’s old apartment living room. 

Tony had brought over his laptop and was giving Steve a music education lesson.

He started with their early stuff and explained the backstory of the lead singer, “See, Steven Morrissey has been an old tortured sole since he was a kid. He only was 17.”

Steve nodded, “I really like this actually. Better than that noisy garbage music you play in your lab.”

Tony shoved his shoulder playfully, “Hey!”

A laugh erupted from Steve, “What?! It sounds like a garbage truck sometimes!”

Tony rolled his eyes, smirking at him, “You just don’t understand what good music is because they weren’t fond of electric guitars in the 40s.”

“This Morrissey guy is using electric guitars right?” Steve asked.

“Yeah…”

“I like THIS. So maybe I just don’t like ANGRY music. Is that better?” 

“Yeah, alright fair point. Now, Morrissey can get pretty angry from time to time but he it’s more angsty and sad than actual anger.” said Tony.

Steve sighed, “This guy is just like me huh?”

“Ya know what? He is! Down to the name. Oh my god!” Tony laughed a little harder than usual since he had loosened up with a few drinks that night.

Steve shook his head with a smile on his lips.

Tony’s laugh faded but he continued to smile at him. Steve started scrolling through the music on the laptop that sat on the coffee table in front of them. 

“What about….Soundgarden? They any good?” he asked, looking back at Tony, “What?” Steve asked. His eye brow shot up.

“Nothing, just admiring the view. Don’t mind me.” Tony said with a smirk.

Steve looked over to see his window was covered by the curtains, “What view?”

“Of you.” said Tony.

Steve scoffed, “Oh stop. You’re supposed to be giving me a music education.”

“Well I have terrible teaching skills so…” Tony said, looking down at his lips and leaning over until they kissed. 

Steve accepted the kiss and smiled into it, “You’re ridiculous.”

“You like it.” mumbled Tony.

Steve was about to reply but Tony shut him up by giving him a deep kiss and encircling his neck with his arms.   
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~  
“Asleep” continued to play. It was really just to get him to relax enough to get some rest anyway. He closed his eyes as the song played and exhaled his smoke. 

He would so miss those moments he shared with Steve. Now he had to worry about his own mental health and life after a split up Avengers.

Towards the middle of the song he got choked up and began to cry again during the part where he says “I don’t want to wake up on my own anymore.” Truly Tony felt like he had no one left. 

\-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

Location: Wakanda 

 

Cap landed the jet on a rooftop with the instruction of T’Challa.

He had briefed Shuri, the Princess, on what was going on but swore her to secrecy. She was waiting on the roof for them with their most trusted guard.

The three of them exited the ramp. Shuri immediately noticed Bucky’s limp and how Steve had to still prop him up. She threw a small metal circle on the ground which expanded into some sort of hovering wheelchair.

“Hello!” she said, pushing it over to them, “Wamkelekile (Welcome) to Wakanda!”

She ushered Bucky to sit in the chair, “I am Shuri, this is Okoye. You must be Sergeant Barnes ?”

Bucky groaned as Steve held onto him to sit him down, “I go by Bucky.”

“Got it.” she smiled.

“I’m Steve Rogers.” Steve said, ready to bow. 

T’Challa stopped him, “It’s fine. We do not bow here.”

The five of them made their way into the medical office with glass walls to remove Bucky’s metal arm and bandage them up. 

When the arm had to come off, it was scary for Bucky. He was already in a lot of pain and the removal process wasn’t exactly easy. A staff of 3 men were standing cautiously in front of him as he sat on an exam table shirtless.

Shuri sighed, “Mr. Barnes, I can give you something to cover up with if you would like. However, that arm needs to come off right away.”

Steve stood across the room watching them.

Bucky held up his hands defensively, “I’m sorry, I just have a problem with a group people in uniform surrounding me.”

Shuri nodded and shooed away the men, “Alright, how about this, I will remove it on my own then?”

Bucky flinched away from her when she shuffled toward him a step. Her face was worried and a little perplexed as she sighed again. 

Steve hurried over to them and stood in front of Bucky, “Hey pal, brace onto me and let her pull that thing off you.”

Bucky looked at him a second then nodded and sat up straight.

Shuri look relieved, “That’s alright with you? Okay, here we go.”

Steve sort of hugged him on his right side and Bucky put his hand on his shoulder. “Now if it hurts just squeeze my shoulder. Do whatever you need okay? Tell us if it hurts too much.” he said. They both knew he’d heal fast if Bucky actually hurt him anyway.

“Okay.” Bucky said, closing his eyes.

Shuri had put on gloves and began to undo the connecting pieces of the arm. One of the men looked on from the hallway into the window of the lab, worrying she couldn’t handle it. 

Every time she disconnecting something, Bucky would groan.

“My goodness,” Shuri said, “this will take a few minutes. My apologies.”

Bucky looked out the window at the valleys, grimacing and hissing. She twisted the arm which got it to start pulling out but it made Bucky bury his face into the front of Steve’s suit and groan.

All the nerves in his shoulder were on fire.

Steve held his back tightly, “Almost done, Buck.”

Shuri found the connected wires and unplugged them, “Alright, got it.” she said. When she yanked it off, it emitted another deep groan from Bucky. When he pulled his face out of Steve’s chest, he was panting.

“It’s over. Let’s get cleaned up.” he told Bucky.  
Shuri handed the half a blasted off limp metal arm to a passing person in a lab coat. She pulled out a long red scarf and gave it to Bucky.

Buck took it and Steve let go of him. He was confused how to arrange it, so Shuri tied and positioned it over the exposed wires where an arm should be.

She smiled, “Now, for tonight my brother and I have some rooms for you two in the palace. Would you follow me?”

Bucky was helped down off the table and put back in the hover chair. They made their way down a few floors to the entrance to the palace. 

Shuri brought them to a long hallway in front of two doors next to each other, “Here you are, say your name toward the doors to open them. It responds only to your voice. We will be sending dinner for you two shortly. There’s also intercoms in the room. My brother will be back with you in a few hours.” 

She waved and started back to the lab.

Bucky stood from the hover chair and looked back and forth from each door, “Which is mine?”

“Say your name and see which one opens?” suggested Steve, looking at the two identical black doors.

“James Barnes” said Bucky.

The left one opened. Bucky shrugged and stood to go in.

“You okay t-?” Steve asked stepping toward him.

“I can walk, yeah I’m alright.” Bucky said, turning to look at him and holding onto the door frame, “I feel...lighter now like...a weight has been lifted off my shoulder.” 

Steve couldn’t hide his laugh that time. He still shook his head. Always with the jokes.

Bucky returned a smile in satisfaction from breaking his stern face he’d had for the past couple days.

Steve looked him over his bloody cut up body, “You going to be okay with the…..arm situation? Can you shower alright?”

Bucky looked down at his scarf covered shoulder. He was still shirtless. “I guess I’m going to have to have a bath.” he shrugged, hissing at the pain he felt.

“You’re a wreck. You’re armless and in pain. You fell 3 stories today.” said Steve, getting Bucky to look back at him, “Let me help you.” 

Bucky sighed and nodded, going into his room, leaving space for Steve to follow.

Steve cautiously looked around at the beautiful palace bedroom. It looked like a 5 star hotel with African decor everywhere. Bucky went into the bathroom to find a giant clawfoot tub and a waterfall stream on the ceiling with black marble everywhere.

There were hygiene products all lined up across the counter and a golden framed mirror above it. Everything was backlit.

Steve took off the jacket part of his suit, then his white undershirt. He got his pants off then Bucky came out of the bathroom, naked and holding a towel over his manhood.

Steve’s eyes widened, but he kept his face casual as he nodded toward him, “You ready?”

“You’re really going to help me?” asked Bucky.

“Ofcourse.” shrugged Steve, “I don’t want you slipping around and struggling.”

Bucky nodded and ducked back into the bathroom. He heard the water start to run. 

Steve couldn’t help but notice his ass when he turned around. 

His closed his eyes, willing himself to behave. He was really tired, so his body wasn’t cooperating, but he was determined to help take care of Bucky before he finally gave in to rest.

Steve willed himself to walk into the bathroom and was greeted by Bucky covering his dick with his hand this time for “modesty” and a claw foot tub half way full of water.

There was a small shelf next to the tub with bath supplies on it.

“So how do I get in?” Bucky wondered aloud, staring into the extremely deep and rounded tub. The scarf was taken off his shoulder but he had covered the open part with a rag to prevent moisture seeping in.

Steve held out his arms, “Hook an arm around my neck and I will lower you in.”

Bucky blushed and looked down at his hand covering his dick. His hair was messy and unkempt around his face.

“C’mon Buck, I’ve seen you before. It’s only me.” said Steve.

“Okay but...I only need help washing my hair. I can bathe myself.” he assured him.

“Sure.” nodded Steve.

Bucky reluctantly uncovered himself and put that arm around Steve who helped him lower himself into the tub. Steve made a point to make it clear he wasn’t looking at his dick.

When he was lowered all the way down, Steve turned to leave the room but Bucky called for him to stay.

Bucky was clutching the side of the tub with his one arm, trying to figure out how to hold steady and wash himself, “You might as well stay. It won't take me long.” Every time he lost grip he would slide around in the deep and rounded tub.

“Just thought I’d give you privacy.” Steve offered, leaning against the counter.

“What for? You’re right, you’ve seen me naked before.” said Bucky, attempting to grab the soap but dropping it on the floor instead.

Steve shook his head and huffed, “Just let me do it.”

Bucky looked a little offended, “I got it.”

“No you don’t.” said Steve, grabbing the soap and the rag. 

Bucky stiffened, “You’re gonna bathe me now?”

“Seems that way.” Steve sighed, leaning down slowly. He started washing his face first gently.

Bucky’s eyes closed as he let him take over. Steve’s arm moved over his good shoulder and down his back. After he rinsed him off, the water became cloudy and soapy.

“Gonna wash your hair now.” Steve said.

He held Bucky by the under arms and dunked him back to wet his hair.

Steve’s mouth dried up and he grabbed the shampoo to start lathering it in his hands. “Ready?” asked Steve.

“Yeah.” Bucky murmured.

Steve began washing his hair. It caused a tingle to rumble through him. A deeper moan escaped his throat.

It made Cap a little hard. Bucky still had his eyes closed but he was smiling a little.

“Alright, I need to turn on the water to rinse.” he said hesitantly, wishing his boner down.

Bucky scooted himself over to hang his metal shoulder over the edge of the tub.

Steve turned on the waterfall and opened the drain as the clean water ran over Buck’s naked body. The cloudy water disappeared very quickly.  
Steve ran his hands through Buck’s hair, rinsing out the shampoo. He admired Bucky’s content expression. It was the first time he had seen him this relaxed since their reunion.

When was the water was turned off, Bucky finally opened his eyes and looked up at him.

Steve caught a glimpse of his dick as we went to grab a towel and pretended not to notice he was at half mast. He slowly leaned down and helped Bucky back out of the tub.

“I know you are tired, Steve. Thanks for helping me anyway.” said Bucky, wrapping the towel around himself in a hurry.

Steve watched him dry off his beautiful chest, “Anytime, Pal.” He noticed Bucky still had a few scratches on his face with the dried blood now cleaned off.

Bucky looked at him sympathetically, “Why don’t you just shower here?”

Steve smiled a little, “They have a room next door for me, I’ll just leave you to it. We need to get some sleep.” He started to turn and get his suit.

Bucky grabbed his arm, “Hey….”

Steve turned back around, his bruised up face looking prepared to take care of his every need.

“I meant to say….”whispered Bucky, “Stay with me? Don’t leave me alone in a strange place, with one arm...please?”

Warmth spread across Steve’s face, “....Sure, Buck.”

Bucky leaned forward and hugged him gently in appreciation, “I’ll let you get cleaned up.” He left him alone in the bathroom.

Bucky went to the wardrobe and found some white tank top`s and boxers, so he put some on. He also found a few dashiki tops and elastic waistband pants. They seemed comfy, so he put on a pair of the pants. He frowned at his reflection in a mounted mirror nearby. His face was still cut up and his metal arm was exposed and empty.

There was a knock at the door.

When he answered he found a nice young man in a uniform who read from his watch, “Mr.Barnes?” he asked in a thick Wakandan accent. 

“Yes.” Bucky said.

The man gave him a plate of food with a dome cover, a pitcher of water with 2 glasses, and a box with twine wrapped around it in a bow.

Bucky put all the items on the small round table by the door, “What’s in the box?” 

“A gift from Princess Shuri. I also have dinner for Mr.Rogers?” he said.  
“Yeah he is in here, I will take it.” said Bucky, taking a second plate of food, “Thank you.”

When he closed the door, he opened the cardboard box right away. It was a black piece of round shaped silicone. “For your arm” read a note inside the box.

Bucky picked it up held it up to his metal shoulder opening. It was exactly the right shape and size. He pushed it in the hole and it created a sealed plug for him. “Woulda been nice to have a few minutes ago.” he murmured to himself. He has seemed weak and vulnerable earlier. That always embarrassed him.

Steve came in the bedroom with a towel wrapped around his waist, “Oh, what’s that?”

Bucky was examining his plugged metal arm in the mirror, “From Shuri. She made it real fast, huh?”

“3-D printing.” Steve said, when he was close enough to examine it.

“What?” asked Bucky, confused.

Steve chuckled as he touched it, “It’s basically silicone. They can create sculptures with a computer now. It’s fascinating.”

“You know about this stuff?” he said, looking up at him in the mirror.

Steve was standing next to him nodding, “Yeah. We used it before with our suits.”

Bucky eyes were drifting across Steve’s reflection down his chest to where his v line met his towel.

“Where’d you get the clothes?” he asked, getting Bucky’s eyes back up to his face. He pointed at the closet and Steve found some pants to put on.

He noticed Bucky’s hair all frizzy and wet sticking to his face. “I found a comb in the bathroom.” said Steve.

“You don’t have to.” smiled Bucky.

He held up his finger and ran into the bathroom to grab the comb. Steve asked Bucky to sit down at the little round table and started to comb his hair.

They both said nothing as he detangled his locks. 

“Thank you.” said Bucky softly, starting to eat his food.  
“You don’t have to keep thanking me.” Steve told him.

When he finished with his hair, they both finished their dinner. Steve started to doze off while sitting up at the table.

Bucky smiled at his still bruised face, “Why don't you lie down?”

Steve snapped awake, “Hm?”

“You have been awake for over 24 hours. Get some sleep.” he said.

Steve rubbed his eyes, “Okay.” He yawned deeply.

Bucky got up from their little table and drew back the covers on the king size bed in the middle of the room.

Immediately, Steve shuffled over to it and plopped down to sleep. Bucky slowly crawled in and laid next to his shirtless body. He admired Steve’s sleeping face before closing his eyes and attempting to drift off to sleep himself.

After a few hours, Steve was woken up by a loud slam.

He sat up and looked around the room to find Bucky murmuring to himself under the table they had eaten on. The two chairs were knocked over.

“Bucky? What’s wrong?” asked Steve, immediately getting up and rushing over to crouch down to him.

Bucky was panting, hugging his knees to his chest, mumbling in a foreign language. His eyes were dark. He didn’t even seem like he was aware of anything around him.

“Buck,” Stever repeated, reaching for him, “What’re you-”

As a reflex, Bucky deflected the arm reaching for him and tried to strike him. Steve grabbed his arm and held it back, struggling against him. The darkness of the winter soldier had returned to his eyes.

“No, no….Bucky! Wake up!” he groaned.

Bucky lunged at him and they wrestled slightly on the ground. Steve finally got him pinned, “C’mon it’s Steve! Come back to me, Bucky!” They wrestled around and struggled against each other. It was a lot easier to detain him since this time around he didn’t have the metal arm.

Steve worriedly tried to hold him down. The last time he got him to snap out of it, he had to knock him out. He didn’t want to do that again. 

“Buck, you got to snap out of it!” he said, pushing against him to stop Bucky’s attempt to flip their position.  
Not knowing if it would work or not, he leaned down and pressed his mouth hard against Bucky’s. 

To his surprise, Bucky’s struggling slowed eventually to a stop. Steve kept kissing him for a minute with his arms pinning his shoulders to the ground. When he felt completely still, Steve pulled back and looked into his eyes.

They were that beautiful soft blue again. “Steve?” he asked, a little confused, examining their position.

Cap breathed a sigh of relief and released his shoulders, “Is it really you?” He was surprised it worked.

“It’s me, it’s me.” promised Bucky, “What happened?”

Steve slid off of him and sat on the floor, “You changed again.” He started to catch his breath as they looked at each other.

“Did I hurt you?” asked Bucky quickly.

“No you didn’t.” said Steve.

Bucky sat up and leaned against the bed, “I...I’m sorry.”  
“Don’t be.” said Steve, shaking his head, “We just need to figure out how to help you, Buck-”

“I need to be locked up.” Bucky interrupted.

“What? No you don’t.”

“Yes I do, Steve. You have the strength to handle me if I change. Normal people don’t. I can’t be trusted. I’m mentally ill.” he sighed.

Steve scooted over to him and tucked his hair behind his ear, “Hey, hey. Stop. You were brainwashed, you aren’t crazy.”

“Whatever I am…..I’m still dangerous.” Bucky said, eyes glazing over. A tear ran down his cheek.

There was a knock at the door. T’Challa’s voice came through, “Mr.Barnes?”

Steve immediately went to the door and stepped out into the hall.

“Captain.” The Prince said, nodding. T’Challa had cleaned himself up and put on a nice matching outfit.

“Good evening.” said Steve, “Shuri said you would be coming, but um...it’s not a good time.”

“Is everything alright?” he asked, looking toward the closed door. 

Steve shook his head, “Uh...no but I got it under control.”  
He noticed Steve’s shirt was off and there were abbraisions on his arms and he was red like he’s just gotten in a fight. “I see,” T’Challa said, “maybe I should come back tomorrow to give you two a tour. Would that be alright? I know after the past few days you would need your rest.”

Steve gave him a sincere look, “Thank you.”

“If you need to get back through the door, just scan your face on the screen. Could you not get into your room?”

“I never tried, actually.” responded Steve.

T’Challa looked him over pleasantly, “I will see you in the morning for breakfast?”

“Absolutely.” Steve said, shaking his hand. He scanned his face on the vibranium screen next to the door and joined Bucky.

He was sitting up on the bed looking at his lap sadly. His long brown hair was draped over his face on one side.

“T’Challa will be back in the morning. He just wants to show us around.” Steve said, examining him.

“Did you tell him about me?” asked Bucky.  
“No. Don’t worry.” said Steve, sitting down next to him. They laid back down and got under the covers.

Bucky stared at the ceiling, “I’m scared to try and go back to sleep.” he whispered.

Steve rolled over and sighed, “Do you want me try...hugging you again?”

The lights were off. it was pitch black in the room.

Bucky felt around to find Steve was facing him and lying on his side. “It got me sleep last time.” he said.

Steve’s arms encircled him and pulled him until Bucky was being spooned. He draped the blankets over the both of them and they drifted off to sleep.

 

The next morning, Bucky woke up Steve. “T’Challa is here.” he said, patting his arms and jumping up out of the bed.  
Steve sat up slowly to stretch. He looked out into the sunny city through the now open windows.

Bucky immediately went to open the door. “No, d-” Steve started to say, covering himself with the blanket.

The door was already opened. Bucky smiled at T’Challa and welcomed him inside. 

The Prince looked over Steve confusingly as the embarrassment was obvious on his face. Steve didn’t want anyone making assumptions about the two of them, especially since he didn’t know how Wakandans felt about that kind of thing. 

Bucky sat at the edge of the bed, “So first thing’s first, I need help. I can’t walk around normally constantly in fear of the winter soldier being triggered. We found out I can trigger in my sleep.”

T’Challa crossed his arms and gave him his full attention. 

“Do you have any….I don’t know, brain doctors here?” asked Bucky.

“We have many neurologists here. We also have psychiatrists. Shuri is already working with them to make a rehabilitation program for you. That’s why I’m here. To take you two to her.” said T’Challa.

Bucky looked back at Steve for his input. Steve nodded, “I went through a rehabilitation program when I woke up from the ice. It’s a long road but worth it in the end.”

Bucky looked back at T’Challa, “That’s just what I need. Ice. I need to go into cryo sleep.”

Steve’s eyebrows furrowed. T’Challa looked concerned, “Why do you have to be frozen?”

“I’m unpredictable. I know Steve can’t stay here and protect everyone from me forever.” said Bucky, looking up at T’Challa, “This serum we both have, it makes me immune to a lot of things. You can’t use drugs to get me to sleep if you need to actually do anything invasive. Cryo sleep is the only way to keep me knocked out until you figure out how to fix me. It’s the safest way.

T’Challa looked him over deep in thought.

“We do need to do it. Trust me.” said Bucky, still staring at the young prince in front of him.

T’Challa rubbed his chin thoughtfully, “I suppose we can do that if that is the case. When would you want to start this process?”

“Soon as possible.” answered Bucky.

T’Challa noticed Steve’s eyes shoot to the back of Bucky’s head and the sad look on his face.

“How long can you remain frozen?” asked T’Challa.

“Long as it takes.” he said.

T’Challa nodded, “Alright, I will step out and call my sister while you get dressed. There should be something in the dresser for you. We’ll head straight to the medical center.” When the door clicked closed behind him Steve stood up and went to stand in front of Bucky.

“What are you doing?” he asked, sounding a little irritated.

“I’m doing what I want.”said Bucky calmly, looking up at him.

“It doesn’t have to be like this. I can stay until you are-”

“No you can’t, Steve.” Bucky interrupted, shaking his head, “You just can’t sit here with me holding my hand waiting for me to get better. I know you have unfinished business out there in the world. You have a job to do. Who knows how long this will take or if it will even work at all? ”

Steve put his hand on his shoulder and gripped it softly. They looked into each others beat up eyes.

“We just...I was looking for you for so long. I found you but I have only gotten a few days with you and look at us, we got our asses kicked.” said Steve sadly, “It may sound stupid, but I’m not...not ready to let you go yet.”

Bucky smiled at him, trying to make him smile back, “It’s not stupid. You aren’t letting me go. You will come back to visit me right? Now you know exactly where I am. Everything you did was to help me, right? They seem to want to help me here. Mission accomplished, Pal.”

Steve sighed but nodded, “Can’t argue with that...” He walked over to rummage through the dresser and found a shirt, some tan pants, and a dark hoodie to put on.

“For what it’s worth, I’ll miss you too.” admitted Bucky as he stood up and went over to the dresser to put pants and slippers on. 

Steve looked at him, “I never said-”

“Didn’t have to.” said Bucky, catching him in a deep hug.

Steve wrapped his arms around his waist and settled his chin on Bucky’s metal shoulder. He didn’t know what was happening between them. He didn’t know know what their rekindled relationship even was, but it didn’t matter. Everything came natural between them with no expectations.

They seperated and stepped out into the hall. 

They followed T’Challa to the medical lab. It was an open white lab with digital readouts all over the walls. There were medical tables everywhere and a cryo chamber. Shuri met with them with a few assistants in white coats. 

“Mr.Barnes can you sit here please?” Shuri said, patting a medical table, “We need to take your vitals and put you on an IV.”

Bucky did as she said and let the assistant put a needle in his hand to get fluids in him. They checked him out and started running their test on a blood sample behind a desk.

Steve stood with his arms crossed, watching them across the room the whole time. 

When T’Challa went over to his sister to whisper to her, Steve slowly made his way over to Bucky.

He examined the cryo chamber as he stood by him, “You sure about this?”

“I can’t trust my own mind.” Bucky said, smiling softly, “So until they figure out how to get this stuff out of my head...I think going back under is the best thing...for everybody.”

Steve stared at him with his usual concerned expression.

“Stop worrying Steve.” said Bucky, still smiling, “I told Shuri to call you as soon as I wake up. She seems like a dame that keeps her word.”

Steve’s lip quivered as he let out a deep breath and nodded.. She smiled at the two super soldiers. T’Challa nudged her to get her to get back to work and mind her own business.

They pulled back and Shuri came over to them.

“Okay Mr.Barnes, everything seems good. We are ready for you to get in.” she told Bucky.

“I'll see you soon, okay?” said Steve.

“Real soon.” nodded Bucky.

Steve stood aside. He watched them usher Bucky into the chamber and start to freeze him. Bucky’s eyes closed as the freezing smoke filled the chamber.

Steve had to leave the lab and go out into the hall to avoid crying in front of the entire staff. He stared out the windows deep in thought, assuring himself Bucky would be fine and so would he. It was also finally dawning on him how much everything had changed now.

T’Challa let him be alone for a while before walking over to him to make sure Steve was alright.

They glanced at each other.

“Thank you for this.” said Steve, staring back out the window into the jungle.

“You’re friend and my father were both victims.” said T’Challa, “If I can help one of them find peace…”

“You know if they find out he’s here,” Steve said, “they’ll come for him.”

They looked at each other again.

“Let them try.” said T’Challa, looking out the window.

“You’re willing to take that responsibility?” he asked.

“Trust me, Captain Rogers, he will be fine here.” T’Challa laughed.

Steve nodded and jolted when he felt a vibration in his pocket. He pulled out his communicator, which was vibrating and glowing purple. Natasha was calling him.

“Oh my goodness. I need to take a call.” said Steve, putting the device in his ear, “Hello?”

“Hey.” she said calmly in his ear, “You’re safe?”

“Yeah.”

“I know about Siberia.” she said, “I’m sorry.”

“It’s fine. We’re okay now.” sighed Steve.

“You have him?” asked Natasha.

“He’s being frozen for rehab as we speak.” Steve said.

“Can I meet you? I managed to escape the bossman and I have a helicopter, a suit, and that’s pretty much all I need.”

“Are you...trying to go on the run with me?” asked Steve.

“I wasn’t exactly faithful to the government...or the accords. I’m wanted too. I know how to be secretive. We have gone on missions before, you and me. First thing’s first though, we need to go get our team out of lockup.” Natasha said, sounded half excited and half sarcastic.

“Sure, but...” he said, “You’re not going to believe where I am.”

“Where?” she asked.

Steve smiled at T’Challa.

\-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Time: The week after all the Civil War Fighting  
Location: The Avengers Compound in the country

 

Tony was helping Rhodey with his new robotic leg technology, trying to help him walk.

Rhodey thought he had it but fell down instead. He assured Tony that his injuries aren’t stopping him from wanting to be an Avenger. 

Tony helped him up and suddenly there was a knock at the door. Tony had gotten a package.

Inside the package was a burner phone and a letter with his name on it. When he opened the letter he looked down at the bottom of the pages to see a familiar signature. It was from Steve.

His face became red and hot. 

Tony told Rhodey to give him a minute and took the letter into his lab. When he sat at his desk and fiddled with it, he considered destroying it instantly.

All his anxiety he had been suppressing the past week came bubbling up to the surface again.

Tony opened the letter which read:  
“ Tony,   
I’m so glad you are back at the compound. I don’t like the idea of you rattling around a mansion by yourself. We all need family. Maybe the Avengers are yours, more so than mine. I’ve been on my own since I was 18. Never even fit in the Army. My faith is in people. I’m happy to say for the most part, they haven’t let me down. Which is why I can’t let them down either. We could go our separate ways, but maybe we don’t have to. I know I hurt you, Tony. I guess I thought by not telling you about your parents, I was sparing you. We both had our problems and I didn’t want to add to them. By sparing you, I was really only sparing myself and I’m sorry. Hopefully one day you can understand. I was never lying when I said I loved you and I think I always will, in a way. I wish we agreed on the Accords, I really do. I know you were only doing what you believe in, and that’s all I’m doing too. That’s all any of us should do. I promise, if you need any of us, or if you need me, I’ll be there. Call me.

Steve”

Steve still cared and would help if he needed him, even though they both had feelings of resentment toward each other. That’s what love really is, even if it wasn’t going to be romantic love.

Tony had tears in his eyes as he looked down at the crappy plastic flip phone and saw 2 numbers listed in it: Steve’s and Natasha’s.

He flipped the phone closed and squeezed it in his hand. Tony held it against his cheek and shut his eyes. He missed him so much and he knew he probably would never see him again. He had too much pride to ever call him.

There was comfort and pain in receiving that package.

Tony sat the phone down on his desk and started to get up to leave his lab.

FRIDAY told Tony he had a call from Secretary Ross, who was telling him about a breach at the prison containing his fellow Avengers.

He lied and said he couldn’t hear him and hung up, deciding to help his friends one last time despite the accords. Tony decided he was no longer going to be involved in the super hero bs for a while.

It was time to some GOOD for others.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tony's not crying, YOU'RE crying


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New friends in Wakanda, new lives are starting, and old loves are rekindling.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you like the characters I created and leave some feedback. There is more smut, fluff, and excitement to come!

Chapter 8:

 

Location: New York Upstate, Avengers Facility

 

Pepper was riding in the elevator to Tony’s lab.

He had been avoiding her calls and everyone else’s except Rhodey’s.

Tony was lying on the couch bed on his back projecting images around him from his tablet of a spider-man suit he was working on. The sound of Black Sabbath was loudly filling the air so he didn’t hear the elevator doors override and open.

Pepper walked over to him shaking her head and opened an app on her phone to stop the music and get his attention. 

The sudden silence caused Tony to pop his head up and groan.

He sat up and sighed when he saw her and turned off his tablet and projections, “What did I tell you about override?”

“It was only for emergencies.” she replied.

“What is the emergency?” he shrugged.

Pepper slowly came to sit across from him, “Why won’t you answer my calls? I thought we were going to still communicate for business purposes at least. I haven’t heard from you in weeks. Then I heard about the accords and Germany….Tony....what is going on?”

Tony crossed his arms, “Doesn’t sound like an emergency.”

“Rhodey said he was worried about you. That your aren’t well.” she said.

“You’re not with me anymore. Why do you care still?” he said, shaking his head.

“I love you. I always will. I don’t care what happens. You mean so much to me. You know I’m always here.” admitted Pepper.

Tony looked down at his lap, “I don’t want to go into this right now. Can you come back later?”

“No.” she said, putting down her purse and phone next to her. She took off her blazer and sat back against the back of the couch bed. She was wearing a pencil skirt set. Her flouncy top moved around as she scooted.

Tony squinted at her, “You’re doing what I do aren’t you? Are you doing me at me?”

“Yeah, I learned how to be stubborn from the best. Isn’t it annoying?” said Pepper, “Talk to me, because I’m not leaving until you do.”

He started to give her a snide remark but her cell phone started to ring and interrupted him. 

“So completely ready to talk to me and you didn’t even silence your phone? Nice.” he said in his smart ass tone.

She sighed as she looked at it next to her on the couch bed, “Oh it’s Happy.”

Tony crawled over to her and grabbed the phone to answer it, “Happy!” he greeted.

“H-...wait, I...I called Pepper right?” asked Happy.

Pepper reached for her phone but Tony ducked away out of reach. She couldn’t really wrestle with him in a pencil skirt so she just crossed her arms and glared at him.

Tony knew she despised anyone touching her personal belongings.

“Yeah, she’s here. What do you need?” he asked Happy, smiling at Pepper’s glare.

Happy sighed, “Wow, Tony. It’s so good to hear your voice. How are you doing?”

“I’ll be fine. Doctor says I’m in top shape.” replied Tony, winking at Pepper when she rolled her eyes.

“Good, that’s good.” said Happy, “I just...I miss ya, Tone. You haven’t been replying to my messages. I’m still your friend, right?”

“Yes! Of Course you are.” Tony scoffed, “I miss you too, bud. Tell ya what, I’m going to let you go now but tomorrow you are going to come see me upstate and we’re going to hang out. How’s that sound?”

Happy laughed, “Sure! That sounds great!”

“Okay, man.” smiled Tony.

Pepper nudged his arm and mouthed “why he called”.

“Oh yeah,” Tony said, “what did you call Pepper about anyway? Something important?”

“Was just….calling to see how your meeting went, honestly.” Happy chuckled.

Tony cocked his head at her, “See you tomorrow.” he said before hanging up and sliding her back her phone.

Pepper grabbed her phone and turned it off then put it in her purse. 

“You know I hate when you take my things.” she smiled.

Tony laughed, “Oh, I know. I also know you won’t do anything about it.”

Pepper narrowed her eyes at him, “Can we talk now, your highness?”

“Sure.” he nodded, “Which trauma do you want to unravel first?” 

Her expression became worried, “What happened?”

Tony’s expression dropped to a sad smile, “Isn’t that something we all ask ourselves when he look at our lives...”

“Stop being a smartass, Tony.” she said, patting his shoulder, “I’m being serious.”

He looked down at his lap, “I um….I really think I need to see a therapist again.”

She realized this was going to take a while to coax him into it, so she humored him. “Yes, maybe you should. It was really helping you before. Although all the therapists in the world would tell you that you need to stop….being Ironman.”

“I’ll never stop being Ironman, even when I’m 90.” Tony said, looking toward his various projects on his lab table across the room.

“You can retire. You should eventually.” Pepper said sweetly, staring in his shifting eyes.

“I probably will….eventually.” Tony said as he laid back.

There was silence for a minute before he said, “Alright, I’ll talk.”

Pepper perked up, “Yeah? Why don’t we start about when you went to Romania in the first place?”

Tony thought for a minute and then began his 4 hour version of his story where he edited out the relationship with Steve.

She sat and listened to it all.

\------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Location: Russia

Steve was in a car riding with Natasha to get their jet she had lined up for them. They were wearing their “non conspicuous” clothing.

She was driving way faster than Steve was comfortable with but he trusted her.

After riding in silence for a while he looked over at her, “How much farther now?”

“Half an hour away I’d say.” she replied, keeping her eyes on the road.

“This feels like old times.” he acknowledged.   
“Does, doesn’t it?” she smiled, “We make a good team.”

“You sure we can’t bring Sam with us?” Steve said, looking out of his passenger window into the bleak frozen tundra outside.

“I told you I would like to, but ya know he isn’t exactly trained like I am nor is he a super soldier. He would be a risk.” Natasha said.

Steve nodded, “It’s okay, I just hate to leave everyone behind. Especially after what they risked for me, I feel like I should be repaying them.” 

“You can’t repay someone by putting them in the way of danger again. What we are going to do now is protect people who need protecting, our way. Right?” she said.

“Right.” he said.

They rode in silence for a few minutes.

“Did I tell you Bucky’s awake?” said Steve.

She glanced at him, “Yeah? That’s good. How’s he doing?”

“He’s only been up and about for a few days, Shuri said. He isn’t responding to triggers anymore though.” he smiled a little to himself.

“That’s amazing!” she smiled.

“I’m thinking about giving him a phone too.” he said.

“For sure. I just...I still don’t think you should have sent one to Tony.” Natasha mentioned.

Steve sighed, “He still might need me. I forgave him. I just hope he can forgive me. I told him in my letter I’d still be there for him. That phone was my olive branch.” 

His eyes became distant as he thought about Tony. 

“He’ll probably never even use it anyway.” said Cap, acting like it didn’t bother him as much as it did.

Natasha shook her head, “Probably not.”

She glanced over and saw the sad expression he had then immediately regret her choice of words.

“So I was thinking about dying my hair.” Natasha said, changing the subject, “Make me less likely to be recognized.”

“Good thinking.” he nodded, “By the way, how will we know who needs our help if we are laying low?”

“I got a guy.” she said, “He is secretive but trustworthy. I’ve known him all my life.”

“He just has people lined up who need our protection?” asked Steve, looking at her.

“Well, yeah. I know it may be hard to believe, but some people actually DON’T TRUST THE GOVERNMENT to help them with their big problems.” she said sarcastically, “But for some reason they still would trust us. Some people are actually still on our side. Long as we don’t make a mess and clean up after ourselves, everything should be fine.”

“It was usually the big guys who made the mess.” he murmured.

Natasha furrowed her eyebrows, “Didn’t you destroy a tunnel? And a bridge? And a-” 

“OKAY.” he interrupted, “Be in stealth mode. Got it.”

She smirked toward him.

“So this is our life now huh?” Steve sighed, looking through the windshield of the car at the dull empty land surrounding them.

“I guess so.” said Natasha.

“I mean, I wasn’t sure if being an Avenger would last forever. It was just...all I had when I woke up.” he said thoughtfully, “It wasn’t like I had much before I crashed into the ice. You guys just welcomed me into a whole new version of the world. We didn’t know each other but we became a family.”

“Just like a band. But like a lot of bands, we broke up. It’s not uncommon.” she told him, “I never have taken kindly to authority figures. The more they were trying to control me, the more I wanted to quit anyway. You gave me the nudge I needed, Steve.”

He appreciated her positivity she always tried to spread to him. 

Steve was all gloom and doom all the time. She always tried to pull him out of it, letting him know what he was doing was for the greater good.

 

\----------------------------------------------------------------

Location:Wakanda  
Time: some time during Black Panther

 

Bucky was finally awake. 

He had only been awake for a few days. He stayed frozen for about a full 2 weeks. Shuri “reset” his mind successfully. He seemed normal and less cloudy, they were doing basic motor functions tests on him those few days to make sure the rest didn’t fry his brain.

Shuri would play educational games with Bucky, teach him about history and pop culture he missed, and teach him about Wakanda. He was staying in his room they had given him in the palace, but he didn’t intend to stay there permanently. It was too big and too fancy for him.

Bucky felt so lonely in there. 

He took all his meals in the room alone, never wanting to risk hurting anyone. 

The best part of his day was traveling over to Shuri’s lab for lessons. He was wearing native robes and a scarf over his missing arm as he made his way down the hallway to a hovercraft docked there. Bucky strapped into the hovercraft and said his name and location. It flew him there in no time at all.

When he walked into the lab, it sounded like a screaming match was going on.

He could hear Shuri getting annoyed at a male voice he didn’t recognise.

When he rounded the corner he seems cautious as he saw a grey haired white man standing in front of her in a black dashiki pant suit.

“Should I come back later?” asked Bucky.

Secretary Everett Ross turned to face him when he heard his voice. Shuri sighed, “Oh is it already time? I’m so sorry but yes...we will be delaying lessons for a while. Something has come up.”  
“Barnes? James BARNES is here?” Ross exclaimed, pointing at him.

“Obviously.” scoffed Shuri, rolling her eyes.

“I can believe this.” Ross said, shaking his head at him a little annoyed.

“I’m sorry...did I hurt you before?” Bucky told him, “If I did, I don’t remember.”

“No...but you are still on a wanted list. I know Zemo was behind the UN attack and I personally locked him up but...they still needed a trial for you, Sergeant Barnes. You escaped a high security government prison.” said Ross incredulously.

“Well then it’s settled.” said Shuri to Ross, making them both look at her, “You can take Mr.Barnes to get his trial and we can put that bullet back into your spine for you.”

Ross’s face dropped.

Bucky smirked. 

Shuri smiled after he gave her nothing but irritated silence. “Oh no?” she said.

T’Challa suddenly came in the lab from behind Bucky, “Stoppit, Shuri.” he said to his sister.

He patted Bucky on the shoulder in passing and walked over to her. “We need to get to the council room at once.” T’Challa whispered in Shuri’s ear.

“I’m sorry for you missing your therapy today, but-” Shuri started to tell Bucky.

“It’s fine.” he said, shaking his head, “I just wanted to ask if I could...stay somewhere else possibly? I love the palace. I just….don’t belong there.” Bucky chuckled a little.

“That would be just fine, actually. There are plenty of places you’re welcome to stay here.” Shuri smiled.

T’Challa called one of his guards in and whispered into her ear in their native tongue.

“You can stay in a hut in a village near the ponds. My guard will take you. My dear friend Kaarina lives next door. I will give her a call. Shuri will be by to get you when she is ready for you again..” he told Bucky.

Secretary Ross held up a finger, “What about-”

T’Challa held up his hands, “Later, Mr.Ross.”

A bald guard in a red uniform smiled at Bucky and nodded toward the hovercraft to take him away.

Shuri came running around the corner as they got on the hovercraft. She had a small laptop in her arms, “Here,” she panted, “take this. Remember how I showed you to use your program? Do this until I come to get you. I don’t know how long it will be. I have some royal business to attend to.”

Bucky took the laptop from her and strapped himself in. Shuri did the “Wakanda Forever” sign at her guard and ran back to her brother.

Bucky and the guard rode to a grassy area next to a village of huts and 2 large ponds.

He awkwardly stood there staring at the huts in the daylight, laptop under his arm as the hovercraft flew away.

Suddenly a thin, dark skinned woman who was bald came out of one of the huts, waving her arms. She was smiling wide and had a beautiful drapey sundress on. 

The woman came over to Bucky and held his hands in hers, “Hello! I am Kaarina!”

Bucky smiled back at her, “Bucky Barnes. Nice to meet you.”

“Nice to meet you.” she repeated and let his hands go.

“Your English is fantastic.” he said happily.

“Yes, some of us do not know English in the smaller villages but Shuri taught us. The royal family are long time friends of this village. T’Challa told me you will be staying in my spare home.” she smiled.

He shrugged, “I guess so?”

“Oh, we love new neighbors!” she laughed. 

Kaarina ushered him over toward her home in the tall grass, “This way. My husband is farming, you can meet him later. You will have to meet my children. We have six of them.”

“Six?!” he laughed, following her. 

“Oh yes,” she smiled, “They will love you.”

Kaarina yelled a native word toward her hut and all the children came walking out excitedly over to them.

Bucky watched them nervously. This was the first time he had been around children in years. He was also still adjusting to being reset.

When the kids approached them, they were all talking a mile a minute but she shushed them and lined them up. Most of them had tribal paint on their faces. They all ranged in ages 8 to 1. 

“Children, this is Mr Barnes.” she told them.

“Bucky.” he corrected, holding his hand to his chest.

“Bucky.” she repeated, “He doesn’t speak our native tongue so you have to speak English to him. He also is here to get rest, so try not to bother him alright?” 

Most of them nodded.  
She held her hand over each kid’s head and introduced them to him, “This is Chidike, Tacitus, Bosede, Masika, Anaya, and little Oni.”

He crouched down and shook each of their hands. As he went down the line, they giggled at him.  
“Why are you so white?” asked Tacitus, one of the little boys with paint on his face.

Bucky stood and chuckled a little. His mother nudged his shoulder and scolded him.

“I promise I will learn all your names.” Bucky told them.

She smiled and picked up the 1 year old girl with untamed hair, Oni. She placed her on her hip, “Go play, my babies. Would you like to see your home now, Buck-y?” she pronounced his name broken down to ask if she was saying it right.

He nodded and followed her inside the hut. 

It was simple and round. There was a Queen bed, a bench, and a small table with two chairs. There were some torch lamps on the walls as well.

Bucky nodded as he looked over the hut, “Where do I um….use the bathroom?”

Kaarina chuckled, “There are outhouses over the hill. There are also bath houses over there. T’Chakka built them for us. We cook outside. My husband and I have a brick oven and fire pit if you want to cook. We would have you for dinner anytime.”

Oni reached out at Bucky’s face and grunted.

“What is it my love?” Kaarina asked her.

Oni squeaked out a native word and reached her little hands toward Bucky again.

Kaarina laughed, “She said hair. She wants to touch your hair on your face.”

“My beard?” smiled Bucky, looking at Oni with amusement in his face, “You want to feel my beard?” He pointed at his chin.

Oni nodded her little head and her curly little afro bounced back and forth.

“You don’t have to, really.” Kaarina said, but Oni leaned her full weight over her mother’s arms to tilt herself at Bucky.

Bucky stepped toward her so she would be still and leaned his face over to her.

Oni stared at him with widened eyes and pet one side of his beard with her little hand.

Bucky was nervous, but he forced a sweet smile at the little girl as she put her other little hand on the other side of his face.

Kaarina smiled, “Sorry, my children are very curious.” She continued to hold her leaning toward him.

Bucky couldn’t help but laugh, “It’s okay! How does it feel?” he asked Oni.

Kaarina translated to her and Oni responded to her mother and laughed. “She says you are soft like a wolf.” Kaarina told him. 

Bucky gasped in fake surprise at her then howled softly, imitating a wolf. Oni erupted into laughter immediately then took her hands back and turned back to hug her mother. She smiled at him over Kaarina’s shoulder.

“Oh yes, you will be very popular here. We will give you some privacy. Tell me if you need anything. We have dinner when the sun goes down. Please, join us.” she said before taking her exit.

Bucky closed the curtains he had for doors and opened the laptop to start his videos Shuri had made for him about American history.

\----------------------------

 

Bucky spent the next 2 weeks in his new living quarters getting to know Kaarina and her family. They fed him every meal he needed, but taught him how to make it in the process. 

He was so astonished by their hospitality and it relieved Bucky to have people trust him again.

One day, when Shuri finally came to see him, he woke up that morning to 3 of Kaarina’s boys surrounding him and giggling.

They all ran out of his hut when they realized he was waking up. 

Bucky sat up and heard the boys speaking excitedly outside. He stretched and walked out to find Shuri embracing them.

“Sergeant Barnes.” she called at him, smiling.

The boys ran off laughing.

“Bucky.” he corrected when walked up to her.

She nodded then tilted her head at him, “How are you feeling?”

“I’m fine.” he said.

“No nightmares?” she asked.

“No. I sleep so well out here actually, must be the cicadas.” said Bucky.

Shuri nodded, “Would you like to continue your lessons?”

“Yes, I actually just finished the preloaded sessions. I've been helping the farmers during the day.” he said, pointing back at his hut.

“Perfect, I will send you more. Let’s go to my lab, shall we?” said Shuri, pointing toward her hovercraft. 

When they arrived and went through the sliding doors, Shuri smiled at him and clasped her hands behind her back.

“By the way,” she said, “I have a friend here with us today for breakfast, hope that is alright.”

Bucky nodded and continued to walk with her around the corner to the lounge part of her lab.

When they reached the set of couches and lounge chairs around a large coffee table, a grin appeared on Bucky’s face. He stopped dead in his tracks. 

Shuri smiled at his reaction.

A bearded Steve in a black uniform stood from the couch, “Buck.” he nodded.

Bucky ran a hand through his hair, “Steve.”

Shuri looked back and forth between them and started moving out of the room, “I’ll let you two have your breakfast.”

They barely noticed the 5 star breakfast platter sitting on the coffee table.

Steve started to move toward him with his arms out, “Bring it here, jerk.” A small smile played at the corner of his mouth.

Bucky held his arm open to accept his hug and was almost knocked down by his force. They chuckled softly and both stumbled a bit.

“This is a pleasant surprise.” mumbled Bucky, leaning his head against Steve’s.

Steve was holding him tight by his back, “I told you I would come see you.”

Bucky’s heart sped up and he melted into his embrace.

Steve let the hug last for a few minutes. He felt like he could hold him forever. 

“Uh, Steve?” mumbled Bucky.

“Sorry.” he replied, letting go finally.

The short beard Steve had brushed against his and tickled Bucky when they pulled back from their hug.

Steve was smiling at him and staring deep into his eyes like he was seeing Bucky for the first time.

He cleared his throat, “You want to....are you hungry?” Bucky asked, tucking his hair behind his ear and led the way over to the couch.

They sat down together and looked over the bacon, boiled eggs, fruit, bread, jam, and tea.

Steve poured tea from a small African pot into a small cup. He blew on it to test the heat before taking a sip.

Bucky nibbled some fruit as he examined him, “I have only been awake for a little over a few weeks. You didn’t have to come back right away.”

Steve reached for some bread, “I left you a month ago, you realize. Seemed a lot longer to me.” He sat down his tea cup and looked at him, “You seem different.”

“How?” asked Bucky, grabbing bacon to nibble on.

“You’re eyes are brighter, clearer. You seem like your old self again. You’re darker. Been in the sun?” said Steve.

Bucky nodded, “I’ve been learning how to farm.” His voice muffled by food in his mouth. 

That surprised Steve. He raised his brows, “Really?”

“Yeah, they put me in a hut in a nearby village. Didn’t ask for rent money, so I got to help somehow. You should come meet my neighbors.” 

Steve smiled, “Sure.” He ate some of probably the best watermelon he’d ever eaten. 

“How long are you here for?” asked Bucky.

“A few days at least, could be more. We completed our first ‘mission, but I gotta get back to it eventually. Don’t have another lead yet.” Steve told him.

“What kind of mission?” Bucky asked.

Steve shook his head, “Let’s not talk about me right now. How are you?”

Bucky nibbled his food, “I’m fine. I’ve been sleeping well and everything. Shuri’s been giving me history lessons, teaching me meditation, and she’s testing my memory all the time. It’s improving.”

Steve nodded, “That’s great.”

“I’ve been trying to learn to use the internet on my own.” He laughed, “It’s a….a challenge, but I’m getting it.”

“You get internet in your hut?” chuckled Steve.

“Yeah, everything here is more advanced than you think. I owe all my progress to her. She’s better than any teachers we used to have back home.” Bucky dusted crumbs off his robe he was wearing.

Steve touched the scarf hanging over his missing shoulder, “I like this….outfit.” 

“Thanks.” Bucky laughed, “Kaarina, my neighbor gave it to me. This was her husband’s, but she said he ‘was getting too large for it’.”

“Looks good on you, Buck.” Steve said, “By the way, I have something for you.” He reached into one of his cargo pockets and pulled out a small flip phone. Bucky took it from him slowly.

Staring at the phone Bucky said real low, almost to himself, “My own phone. Never had one of these before.” He looked up from the phone into Steve’s blue eyes, “This is great. I can call you even if you’re on the other side of the world?”

“Absolutely. It works. Honestly, if it doesn’t, I’m sure Shuri could fix it. It only has my number and Natasha’s. It is pretty much untraceable and easy to use. So...we can keep in touch. It’s been hard being in the dark, not able to talk to you.” he told him, leaning back against the couch.

Bucky sighed, “When I first woke up I was really sick and confused. Then we were testing my reflexes and triggers for a few days. I don’t think I trusted myself to talk to anyone besides Shuri in the first 3. I’ve been thinking about you, just haven’t worked up the confidence to ask to see you yet. I’m glad you’re here.” 

 

They sat silent for a moment staring at each other lovingly. Steve was admiring the new positive glow around his oldest friend. 

Bucky felt happy but vulnerable and almost embarrassed by how much he was being marvelled at. He looked out the large windows of the lab and scooted closer to Steve on the couch.

Steve smirked at him and suddenly wondered if Shuri was still within earshot of them.

He glanced over Bucky’s face, “So, if we are done with breakfast, you want to…show me around?”

“Right now?” asked Bucky. Steve nodded.

“Sure, I guess we could do that.” he replied, standing up.

Steve stood and picked up his bag he had on the floor. He let him lead the way to the hovercraft and they rode back to Bucky’s village.

They arrived and began walking along the path in the tall grass. 

“By the way, our presence was demanded for dinner at the palace tonight.” Mentioned Steve with his bag slung over his shoulder, “I’m already in hot water because I didn’t say hi to T’Challa first. He wants us to meet everyone.”

Bucky continued to walk ahead of him, “S’fine.”

Steve was captivated by the rolling grassy hills they were traveling on. “Wow,” he breathed, “it’s beautiful here.” He couldn’t help noticing how good Bucky looked from behind in his gown ensemble. “Much better than what I’ve been stuck in, that’s for sure.

“Where’d you fly in from?” Asked Bucky over his shoulder.

“Russia. Everything is grey.” Said Steve.

“I remember unfortunately.” Bucky replied, “You’re going to love it here then. Definitely no grey.”

They reached his hut and Bucky stopped Steve with his hand on his shoulder. 

“So, Kaarina has a ton of kids, watch out for the 3 oldest boys. They are friendly, but very invasive. I have to install a door on my hut today because they woke me up this morning.” said Bucky, humor in his eyes. 

Kaarina had warned Bucky but he held off on installing the door until the last possible moment. 

Steve smiled, “Got it.” 

As soon as he said that, the kids started to file out of Kaarina’s house curiously. 

Kaarina followed them. “Do not run!” She scolded. 

The children moved quickly over to the two men. Oni lead them in the front on her wobbly legs. Her siblings carefully walked behind her to make sure she didn’t fall. 

Steve’s eyes widened pleasantly and he smiled at the adorable little girl. She laughed started making little wooping noises when she got closer to Bucky.

“That’s Oni. She’s um...well, she’s started to howl at me when she sees me.” Bucky laughed.

“Why?” Chuckled Steve. 

“The kids, they call me….white wolf.” he shrugged.

Bucky looked excitedly at Oni and she held her arms out to be picked up. It surprised Steve to see Bucky reach down and scoop her up with his one arm. 

The kids were all talking excitedly like when they had first met Bucky.

Kaarina came over to Steve to shake his hand, “Hello there.. I am Kaarina.”

Steve smiled politely, “Steve Rogers. Nice to meet you.”

“Sorry if my children are a little excited. They love new visitors.” She smiled.

Bucky called their attention to him, “Hey guys, this is my best friend, Steve.”

They all started repeating his name and shaking his hand and hugging him. He was amused by how excited they were.

“Alright, alright.” Kaarina said, dismissing her kids.

They ran off, but Bucky was still holding Oni as she looked at Steve and back to him.

“Who?” Oni asked him, pointing at Steve.

Bucky laughed, “He’s okay.”

Oni looked at Bucky with a questioning look.

He used a slight baby voice Steve had never heard before when he said “Yeah, he’s a good guy.” 

Steve and Kaarina were smiling at them. 

“Oni loves Bucky. She follows him everywhere.” Said Kaarina.

Steve stepped toward Bucky holding the little girl.

“Hello there, Oni.” Smiled Steve.

She looked at Steve with a concerned look before grabbing at his chin.

“She loves beards.” Bucky told him.

Steve leaned toward her and she softly pet his face with her little hand.

Bucky asked Oni how it felt in her native tongue.

“Prickly.” She said, pulling back her hand and making a funny face.

That got a laugh out of Bucky and Kaarina.

She took her daughter gingerly from his arms. 

“By the way, I will be putting on my door today.” Bucky told her. 

“Beto’s tools are under the door. I’m taking the children to the market now, do you need anything?” said Kaarina.

Steve smiled to himself at their conversation. He was so proud Bucky was already a normal part of a neighborhood. 

Bucky smiled, “We’re fine, Kaarina. Thank you.” He put his hand on his chest for emphasis.

The family started down the hill. Steve let Bucky lead the way inside his hut.

He looked around at his bed, table, a laptop on the table, chairs, and a small trunk for clothes. Bucky never had a lot to his name. 

Sitting on his bed, Bucky said “Not much but it’s home.”

Steve’s eyes wandered around the room then settled back on him. “Where should I put my bag?” he asked.

Bucky shrugged, “Wherever is fine. Actually, hang on….you think you can just show up unannounced and stay here, punk?” he said playfully.

Steve dropped his bag to the floor against the wall, “Well, of course I can.” he smiled.

“Listen, just because you are a fugitive too doesn’t mean you can do whatever you want, okay? I’m sure T’Challa would be happy to have you back at the palace.” joked Bucky.

Steve took off his jacket, revealing a tight white wife beater underneath. His muscles on his back were bruised slightly. Bucky noticed when he turned around and licked his lips nervously.

“To be honest with you Buck,” said Steve, turning back to him and stepping over to the bed, “I don’t care where I stay, as long as it’s with you.”

Bucky blushed and pulled Steve’s arm for him to sit on his right side on the bed. The mattress bounced back roughly.

“Okay, I guess my bed can handle both of us,” observed Bucky, “it’s narrow though.”

“That’s okay.” said Steve softly putting a hand around his hips.

Bucky glanced down at the arm around him, “Steve?”

“Hmm?” he replied, looking down at Bucky’s mouth.  
“Just kiss me.” said Bucky, looking up at him.

Steve shook his head slowly, “I don’t want to push you into anything after your procedure.”

Bucky put his hand on Steve’s cheek, “You’re not. I-It’s me, I’m not broken. I’m...better.”

Their heads drifted closer together.

Bucky said in a mixture of a groan and a whisper, “I want you to.”

Steve immediately began to kiss him slowly and deeply. He wrapped his arms around Bucky’s back and gently cupped the back of his head. They both pulled back slowly. Bucky looked over his bearded face and noticed his eyes were still closed.

“You alright?” chuckled Bucky.

Slowly, Steve let his eyes flutter back open, “I’m fine.” He cleared his throat and shook off the goofy grin on his face.

They stared at each other hazily. 

Steve’s heart was pounding, “I missed this...I missed you.” He had promised himself from now on he would tell everyone exactly what was on his mind. There was no longer an image to uphold and no one to answer to.

Finally a free agent.

Bucky cupped his jaw and dove in for a deeper, more rough kiss. 

When they pulled back for air, they both were panting.

Steve noticed tears appearing in Bucky’s eyes. He shook his head while looking worried, “Aw, Buck. What? What’s wrong?”

Bucky took his hand back and wiped the moisture from his face, “I’m just so happy. I haven’t uh….felt this way in a long time. I’m just a little emotional. I’m sorry.” He suppressed anymore tears from surfacing.

“You don’t have to apologize.” said Steve. 

Bucky nodded and sniffed a little. He laid his head on Steve’s bare shoulder and sighed. They hugged tighter. 

After a minute of Steve rubbing his back in silence, Bucky sat back to look at him finally. 

Realization poured over his face. “Oh beautiful right?” Bucky laughed, wiping his face again, “I said I was better and I’m fucking sitting here crying.”

“I almost cried when I saw you.” admitted Steve, eyes filled with adoration.

“Really?” asked Bucky, feeling a little better.

“Well yeah….I couldn’t let it out in front of Shuri. I’m so proud of how far you have come. I was worried I was going to come back here and you were going to be….worse. This is all pretty emotional for me too.” 

“We assume the worst. It’s all we know.” 

“Things are going to be better for both of us.” said Steve sternly, “From now on I’m not going to brood anymore or feel sorry for myself. I promise I’m going to be here when you need me, no matter what.”

“C’mon, you know you can’t guarantee that.” chuckled Bucky.

Steve’s hands moved to Bucky’s hips, “No, I mean it. Even if I’m in the middle of a mission on the north pole, with Santa Claus himself, I will speed through it and get to you as soon as I can. I will fly all day and all night if I have to.” His eyes were drifting over Bucky’s smiling face. 

Bucky shook his head, “You sound like me when I was flirting with dames back in the day. I used to vow to do all kinds of things.”

Steve ducked his head down to catch his lips in a few soft short kisses, “I finally got you back and you are alive and well. You know I can never make empty promises to you.”

“I know.” blushed Bucky, looking toward his still very open doorway.

Steve followed his gaze, “Oh yeah, still need to hang that door, huh?”

“Yup.” he said flatly.

“Need some help?” asked Steve.

“Sure, I’ll put you to work.” said Bucky, standing up and beckoning him out the archway.

Steve held things in place while Bucky used the tools to fasten in hinges and a sturdy wooden door to the frame. They even created a locking system with holes and bolts. When they finished, it was almost the evening and they could hear Kaarina and her children coming back from the market.

Bucky locked the new door, “Just in case.” he grimaced.

Steve chuckled and walked around his hut looking at all of his belongings, “You know, you should get a record player in here, like we used to have. You always had music playing all the time.”

“I remember,” said Bucky, sitting at his little table, “but Shuri has shown me the magical world of music streaming.” He pointed at the laptop closed in front of him, “This thing lets me listen to whatever I want and I don’t have to own it. Shuri made me an account on a program so that I can listen to music from different time periods I’m learning about. Man, music changed so much over the years…”

Steve was examining the gourds on the wall up close, “You’re telling me. When I had an apartment in D.C. I tried to get into new artists but it was all a little much for me. I had to be eased into it. I bought an old record player to play records you and I used to have. I had a pretty good collection at one point.”

“What happened to them?” asked Bucky.

Slowly, Steve looked over at him. “Actually, um….you shot them up. That was before I burst through a window to chase you through rooftops.”

Bucky’s face dropped, “Oh...I didn’t realize-”

Steve shook his head, “No, that doesn’t matter. You wanted to know.” he chuckled, trying to change his mood.

Bucky suggested they get cleaned up for dinner. 

Steve looked around, “Where do I shower?”

“There are showers over the hill.” he replied, “I need one too. I’ll show you.” He grabbed the two towels he owned and led the way out of the hut.

When they walked over the grassy hill, they approached a cinderblock building that looked a bit like a public restroom. Steve was surprised to find nice and clean giant shower stalls complete with lights and air conditioning. There was a sink and seating in the front of the little building.

Bucky ushered him forward, “Pick a stall. There are soap dispensers built into the wall. Everything here smells like jasmine and citrus, but they do the job and are always full.”

Steve noticed no one else was in the building. He took off the sweaty wife beater and immediately noticed Bucky’s eyes roaming over his body. He took a towel from Bucky’s hand and made his way down the series of shower stalls on both sides of him.

They walked all the way to the stalls on the end. Steve dropped his cargo pants then stepped out of them and into the stall to get the water going.

Bucky stared at the tight boxer briefs hugging Steve’s perfect ass. He took his scarf off of his shoulders.

Steve turned back to him, “You need any help taking off your-”

Bucky blushed, “What?” He looked down at his robe, “No, no it’s easy that’s why I have it.”

With a nod, Steve went into his shower stall. He let the door swing shut and slipped off his underwear in the same motion. 

Bucky could see little snippets of his nude body before it clicked closed. He chose the stall across from Steve’s to shower. It was becoming increasingly difficult to stop thinking about his naked friend.

He turned the water on, stripped and stood right under it as it came out cold. Hoping it would stop making him feel so nervous, he didn’t turn the hot water on just yet.

Bucky looked toward his frosted glass shower door. He considered throwing caution to the wind and jumping in with Steve, taking what he had been waiting so patiently for. 

Steve would probably be familiar enough for him not to feel so self conscious. Besides, the way he was kissing him earlier seemed like Steve wanted the same thing.

They both showered separately and emerged from their stalls with towels around their waists at the same time.

Steve sighed and put his hands on his hips, “That was nice. All the showers in Russia were too small for me. I could actually move in there.”

Bucky was distracted, letting his eyes roam over his longer, slicked back hair and wet muscular chest.

Steve noticed and smirked, “So you just walk back to the hut from here in a towel every time?”

That snapped Bucky’s attention back, “What? Uh, no. I’ve been bringing clothes with me but I didn’t think about it. It’s okay.”

Steve held his towel in place as he grabbed his clothes and led the way back to the hut. They didn’t encounter any neighbors or prying eyes luckily. When they got inside, Bucky closed the door behind them and locked it. It felt nice to finally be able to do that.

Bucky turned to find Steve’s beautiful naked ass facing him as he dried off. He instantly felt his cock get hard and clutched the front of his towel. 

Ever since Bucky had been woken up from cryostasis, he had been having nothing but wet dreams about Steve. Graphic sexual memories would return to him every day while he was doing some kind of farm work. That’s what made him nervous about their reunion, and why he didn’t make the move to ask Steve to visit.

The last time they were together he was a little less focused on the tension between them and more worried about his mental stability. Now he was “cured”, he was feeling his primal instincts returning to him. 

When Steve reappeared, so did all his feelings and urges.

The underwear and clothes he needed were in the trunk on the other side of the hut. 

Bucky blushed and tried to scoot around him but he turned around suddenly, startling him.

“Oh, um, sorry.” he sighed, looking down and trying to move away.

Silently, Steve went over to his bag to get dressed. 

Bucky began dressing quickly in the corner. 

Steve subtly peaked over at him a bit while he slipped on a clean wife beater, collared shirt, and a pair of black pants.

After Bucky threw on his dashiki pants set (with one sleeve ripped off the top), they made their way to the palace and had a private dinner with T’Challa, Shuri, and their mother, Ramonda.

It was an over the top feast per usual. They had a pleasant dinner with friendly conversation.

After they left the palace, Bucky and Steve were walking down the dark, grassy path back to the hut again. The cicadas and birds sounded off in the distance.

“I don’t think I’ve eaten a meal that big in months.” Steve said as they slowly walked side by side, looking out at the dim torches lit on the outside of the village huts. Only a few people were hanging out on their front steps, but most people were asleep by then.

Bucky smiled, “Me either, honestly.”

“I’ve been eating small things here and there. Trying to stay light on my feet.” said Steve.

“I remember what that’s like. Mission food was usually just protein bars.” he replied, “I got to start cooking. Maybe I’ll learn to cook...for you.”

Steve smiled and looked at him, “Oh yeah?”

“I mean, I can’t rely on Kaarina and Shuri to feed me forever.”

“When we lived together, I did all the cooking. All you made was coffee.” chuckled Steve.

“I’m 100 years old, I can’t be useless. I got to learn to do more.” Bucky said.

“What did you eat out on your own in Europe?” he asked.

Bucky shrugged and looked out at the moon reflecting on the lake nearby. They were speaking softly to each other as they passed other huts. 

“I mostly got fruits, vegetables, stuff for energy. Ready to eat food….that’s it.” said Bucky.

“You mean plums, potato chips, and….chocolate bars?” laughed Steve.

“You know me so well. Believe it or not, I’ve gotten less picky. I’ve enjoyed everything I’ve eaten since I got here, even actual vegetables.” Bucky said, smiling back at him.

“Well, if you DO learn to cook-” Steve started to say. Bucky cut him off, “WHEN.”

Rolling his eyes a little he corrected himself, “When you learn to cook, make some baked ziti like your mom used to.”

Bucky nodded, “Sure, you got it.”

Steve made a pleased grunting noise, “Ugh, that was my favorite.”

“She tried to make it for you all the time because she was trying to help you put on weight.” Bucky recalled.

They chuckled together a little.

When they made it to the hut, Bucky went over to his wall and turned on his lamp. As soon as they closed the door, Steve took off his collared shirt so he didn’t ruin it. Bucky took off his top too he could relax shirtless in his loose pants. 

Steve laid back on the bed and sighed, “I’m exhausted.” He slowly took off his pants and slid them onto the floor, so he was in his wife beater and briefs.

Bucky looked him over, “Oh yeah?” 

Steve could see the disappointment on his face, “Yeah, I basically flew in on no sleep, but I can stay up with you if you want.-”

“No no, it’s fine.” said Bucky, picking up his little tablet Shuri gave him to read history books, “I’ve got this. Books you read in the dark. Keeps me occupied.”

Steve got under the blanket, “Are you sure?” A huge yawn took him over.

Bucky smiled and slid in next to him on the Queen sized bed. Their wide shoulders touched a little on the small bed. 

As he settled in, Bucky sat up against the wall and said “Night, Steve.”

Steve looked over at him lazily.

Bucky caught him in the corner of his eye staring so he met his gaze.

Slowly, Steve lifted himself up and gave him a soft lingering. kiss. “Goodnight, Buck.” he smiled and laid back down and closed his eyes.

Bucky felt warm all over as he stared down at his sleepy bearded smirk. 

 

Early the next morning, in the blue light of the sunrise, Bucky woke up to Steve’s snores next to him.

He looked down and noticed his tablet face down on his chest, so he set it aside. Then he noticed the huge morning erection, right on time.

He sighed and looked over at Steve, who was sleeping on his side facing Bucky. He tried to slip out of the bed undetected but shifting caused the bed to move and Steve to stir.

“Hmph.” he mumbled, and slowly opened his eyes, “Hey Buck.” Steve smiled and stretched.

Bucky returned the smile, but slid down to lie on his side facing him. He cupped his hand on Steve’s face and let his eyes roam over his face lovingly, memorizing the way he looked while he was sleepy and sweet like an angel in the the rising sunlight.

Steve put his arms around Bucky’s waist and pulled him closer to press their bodies together.

Bucky kissed him first, licking across his bottom lip, begging to dive in his mouth. He allowed him in and their tongues rolled over each other smoothly. 

Steve moaned into his mouth and let one hand slip down to Bucky’s ass.

He made a soft surprised noise in the back of his throat, making Steve pull back. “Sorry, is that ok-” he asked, but was cut off by more of Bucky’s lips. 

Steve was suddenly pushed to roll onto his back as Bucky straddled him. Immediately, Bucky noticed the feeling of another hard cock rubbing against his.

Two hands were clutching onto Bucky’s ass and pushing downward to gain more friction. He was moaning into Steve’s mouth, but he pulled back to gasp for air.

Steve licked his lips, “Mmm….Buck...” He moaned real low when Bucky’s mouth moved to kiss and suck on his neck. 

One of the hands on Bucky’s ass moved to the back of his head to cradle it. 

Bucky’s mouth moved up to his ear where he sucked his earlobe and nibbled lightly..

Steve groaned hungrily and pulled his head back up to meet his deep rough kisses. 

After a minutes, Bucky pulled back to sit up and untie his pants. Steve pushed his hand away and did it for him, helping out of them. 

Once again Bucky was straddling him, running his hand down Steve’s chest slowly as they kissed. He reached Steve’s dick but he grabbed Bucky’s hand to halt his movement. 

Sitting up straight, Bucky looked down at him, “What?” he panted, “I told you last night I was fine.”

“It’s not that.” Steve whispered and flipped them over so Bucky was on his back.

He loomed over him and kissed Bucky more, “Just let me take care of you.” he whispered against his lips.

That made a shudder run through Bucky’s body under him. Steve kissed his neck and bare chest, then worked his way down to his abs and the deep v line on his hips. 

The sun coming in through the cracks of his shut windows was making the hut a little brighter every few minutes. Bucky’s red briefs were much more noticeable now and so was the massive hard on straining against the fabric.

Steve kept kissing across his lower belly and could feel his hard cock pushing against his chest. One of his fingers hooked into his waistband and started to pull.

Bucky was staring down at him, biting his lip with heavy lidded eyes. He then felt his dick spring free, then Steve’s warm and wet mouth take him in. He threw his head back with a “Mmph”.

Steve had never done that to him, even before the war. This was a new side of him.

Steve rhythmically bobbed his head up and down on his cock, his eyes shut and his weight resting on his elbows. His hands were gently cupping Bucky’s ass.

Bucky looked down at him, barely able to catch his breath. He bucked up into Steve’s mouth, gently running his hand through his hair to hold him still.

“Shit…” Bucky moaned as Steve slowed down his pace, making sure the tip of his cock gently rubbed the back of his throat.

“Oh….God….ungh.” panted Bucky, “Steve, I’m..I’m-”

Steve held his hips still with his hands and bobbed his mouth harder and faster onto his dick.

Bucky’s breath hitched in his throat as he came in Steve’s mouth. He gagged, not at the feeling but the amount. 

Steve wiped his mouth and pulled up Bucky’s underwear but kissed across his belly again, slower this time to calm him down.

“Where….did you learn that?” breathed Bucky, running his hand through his own hair, “Jesus Christ, Steve.”

A smile appeared on Steve’s face as he kissed upward to his chest.

Bucky set his hand on his shoulder, “You’ve never done that before. I would have definitely remembered.”

Steve kissed his neck, still not responding. Bucky ran his hand down to the small of his back.

“Steve?” he whispered. “Hmm?” Steve replied, pulling back to look down at him.

Bucky stared into his eyes, “Why’d you do that?”

“Not good?” he smiled, raising an eyebrow.

“C’mon Steve, I’m not complaining I just-”

“No I get it. I guess you haven't seen this side of me…..I have learned a few things.” Steve said, looking over his face with a lazy grin stamped on his face.

Bucky leaned up and kissed him, “Why now though?” 

“I was in the moment, and I love you, want to take care of you.” he replied.

Bucky’s eyes widened, “You what?”

Steve’s face softened even more and he brushed some stray hair out of Bucky’s face. He said it again fearlessly, “I love you, Buck. Didn’t you know that already? I always have.”

Bucky hadn’t heard that combination of words in so long. He bit his lip as he stared up at him.

When there was still no reply, Steve said, “Remember yesterday when I made those promises to you? I told you I meant all of them, forever...end of the line. We belong together.”

Tears were threatening to appear in Bucky’s eyes. He let out a deep breath and hugged him to his chest.

Steve embraced him with his cheek to his chest and looked toward to the light pouring through the window shutters.

Bucky ran his hand through Steve’s hair and down his back, “I love you too, Steve.”


	9. Chapter 9

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG I had this illustration done of my Wakanda chapters. I am in LOVE. This was done by http://inflomora-art.tumblr.com/ CHECK OUT HER PAGE

 

Chapter 9:

 

Location: Pepper’s country home in Long Island, NY  
Time:During the beginning of Spiderman Homecoming just about

 

Tony was sitting on the back porch on an outdoor chair smoking a joint, looking out at the water. He had a soft sweater on with jeans, his glasses flipped up on top of his head.

He and Pepper had been seeing a lot more of each other since he had filled her in on the Avenger’s drama 2 months prior. 

Tony was spending the night with her 4 nights a week. He just couldn't stand to be alone. 

Since Vision had left to be with Wanda, there was not many Avengers left at the compound.

Pepper slid the glass door open behind him and sat on the other outdoor chair across from him, “I’m a little bothered you do that.” she commented, giving him a playful smile.

“I know, but it’s the only thing that keeps me calm.” said Tony, looking over at her.

“What about medication?” she suggested.

“I don’t trust pharmaceuticals anymore. This is natural.” he replied and took another deep puff of his joint.

She cocked her head at him, “I just can’t stand the smell sometimes.”

“I will get a vape pen like those cool millennials. That better?” he smiled.

Pepper sighed and shook her head, “Sure.”

They listened to the waves below for a few moments.

“So...I was thinking….” Tony said, looking over at her, “Why don’t I just move back in?”

“Really?” she asked, raising her brows.

“I drive or fly out here most of the time anyway. Would save me a fortune on gas.”

“So that means….” she paused, glancing away then back at him, “You want to get back together?”

“I thought we already were.” he said, snubbing his joint in an ashtray next to him.

Pepper got up and sat across him on the lounge chair he was occupying. “We never actually talked about it….” she said.

“We are now.” he said, taking her hand, “We always come back together. This just makes sense.”

Pepper stared into his brown eyes, “I don’t know, Tony…..our problem was I couldn’t handle you leaving to get hurt all the time. It’s so stressful. It’s worse than you being a cop or a soldier...you’re a target, and-”

Tony cut her off with a kiss. When he pulled back he said softly, “Don’t you love me?”

She gave him a worried expression but nodded, “Of Course I do, Tony.”

“I love you too. That should be all that matters. However, if you want me to start taking less missions, smoking weed less, whatever, I can.” he said, “We can work on it. Whatever it takes to be on the same page. I wasn’t willing to do that before but I am now.”

Pepper’s expression turned to sympathetic, “I appreciate that.”

“What do you say?” asked Tony, cocking his head at her.

She looked over the balcony rail then back at him, seemingly deep in thought.

Tony took both of her hands in his, making her gaze stay on him. “Pepper.” he demanded.

“I...guess I will take you back...but this is the last time, Tony.” she said.  
He started to celebrate but paused, “What do you mean the last time?”

“We’re never splitting up then getting back together AGAIN. I want to be in this for good, or not at all.” she said.

Tony smiled softly, “Okay then.”

“Agreed?” she asked.

“Agreed.” he nodded. She pulled him into a tight hug. He stroked her hair and buried his nose into her neck.

Tony’s phone vibrated and he flipped down his F.R.I.D.A.Y. glasses. The Spiderman was in trouble again.

………………………………………………….

Location: Kazakhstan

 

Steve and Natasha were going after a suspect as part of their mission. The guy was a 40 year old business manager that was embezzling money from his employees and transferring the funds to Hydra controlled accounts.

The man was more limber than they though and put up quite a fight. 

Natasha was flying after him in the jet to keep at eye out.

Steve had cornered him in a shipping yard and was running on top of cargo crates lined up on the docks.

“He’s right below you, stay still!” said Natasha into Steve’s headset.

Steve jumped down off the crate he was standing on and landed right on top of him, leaving them tumbling together to a halt against a crate.

The guy groaned in another language then yelled as Steve put electric cuffs on his wrists. “You won’t get away with this.” the guy said as Steve stood over him.

“Oh I won’t?” asked Steve sarcastically. 

“Nice work. I’m touching down.” said Natasha in his ear.

“Hydra has eyes and ears everywhere. They will speak of you, they will hunt you down, and they will eliminate you.” said the smarmy guy.

Steve rolled his eyes, “Heard that one before.”

After they turned the target into the proper authorities, Natasha and Steve made their way to a private airport in Moscow. 

They sat parked on the tarmac inside the jet they had, waiting and watching planes arrive and depart.

Steve got a text from Bucky, the vibration of his phone getting his attention. They were sitting in the front two chairs looking out the windshield. Natasha watched him chuckle under his breath as he read the message.

“What’d he say?” she asked softly.

“He said he’s been cooking.” said Steve.

“What did he make this time?” asked Natasha, looking around the airport.

“Some kind of squash dish, completely unburned, he said.” Steve, tapping a reply to Bucky.

Nat looked over at him, “You guys are so adorable.”

Steve scowled at her a little but closed his phone and stuffed it into his pocket. He stood suddenly, “There he is.” he said.

Sam was standing in front of their jet, holding his bags and waving.

They let him aboard and he hugged them both. “It’s been a minute. What took you guys so long?” Sam said.

“We wanted you to have time to recuperate. Also we wanted to make sure we weren’t putting you right back into danger.” said Steve. 

Sam rolled his eyes, “Is this because I broke my wings?”

“A little bit.” smiled Natasha.

Sam held up his wing pack, “For your information, this is brand new, not broken.”

“Let’s get to work then.” said Steve.

“Alright.” nodded Sam, “Where to first?”

“To get an assignment.” said Natasha, sitting buckling up in her chair and booting up the jet. The two men strapped themselves into the jet.

Steve filled him in on how their assignments and housing situation worked. After a silent few minutes, Sam asked, “Have you two talked to anyone besides me?”

“Not really, trying to lay low.” said Natasha, “Real low.”

“Not Clint?” asked Sam.  
“No.” responded Natasha. 

“T’Challa?” Sam said.

Natasha and Steve looked at each other. She cocked her eyebrow at Steve.

He turned around to look at Sam behind him, “I have been talking to T’Challa.”

“I thought he just turned in Zemo for you. Are you guys friends now?” said Sam.

“He did.” nodded Steve, turning back around to face forward, “I guess we are kind of friends now. I owe him a lot of gratitude.”

Sam nodded, “For sure.” 

Natasha glared at Steve to say something. He’d promised Natasha he was always going to be honest and open and never withhold the truth. Right now he was breaking the promise.

“I’m in touch with Bucky, also.” admitted Steve, looked down at his lap.

“What? Is he locked up somewhere?” asked Sam.

“No need, he’s….cured, far as we know.”

Sam sighed in disbelief, “Steve, c’mon. Cured from 70 years of brainwashing?”

“It’s true.” said Natasha, keeping her eyes forward as she flew, “Princess Shuri helped him. She’s the most advanced scientist I have ever seen.”

Steve gave her a look of thanks. “Really? So he’s there with them in...Wakanda?” asked Sam.

“Yeah, he’s...farming.” replied Steve, “Doing much much better.”

“I’m assuming you’ve visited him then?” Sam responded, his tone kind of annoyed.

“Just once after he woke up. That was a few weeks ago now.” Steve said, still keeping his tone friendly and even. The truth was he knew exactly how long he had been away from Bucky down to the hour.

Sam nodded, “I see…” He got quiet. Steve turned to him to study his expression. He could see slight annoyance across his face but made eye contact with him anyway.

“I know what you are thinking,” said Steve, “but my main goal was to help him and I did. He’s a completely different person. Buck’s been learning how to cook, Shuri’s been educating him, and he’s even babysitting kids now.”

“Is he?” asked Nat incredulously.

Sam looked a little surprised, “Those kids’ parents know about him?”

“That doesn’t matter. I told you he’s...he’s changed. You’re just going to have to trust me. I’ve never lied to you. I mean, that’s why you are here now.” said Steve as friendly as he could.

Sam crossed his arms and sat back in his seat, still staring at Steve. After a few beats he nodded, “You got me there.”

Steve gave him a nod and turned back around in his seat. 

Natasha cleared her throat at Steve and gave him another look. He furrowed his brows and shook his head. She glared harder with her “assassin eyes”.

He rolled his eyes and pointed his head slightly toward Sam. “So,” breathed Steve, “I’m planning on visiting Bucky as often as I can between missions. I will try and keep the trips brief and I can always fly right back to wherever we’re set when we get a lead.”

“What about us? We’d be stuck without transportation?” Sam asked.

“Nat gets cars and housing wherever we go, it’s not a problem.” promised Steve, glancing back at him briefly.

Sam stared at his two friends. The three of them were all in their casual clothes, he noticed. He looked at how Natasha was egging Steve on to say more like he was hiding something.

Steve huffed at her once more. There was a moment of silence.

Sam looked out the window on his left side when Natasha suddenly spoke. “Steve’s seeing Bucky.” she blurted out.

At that exact moment, Sam made a audible gasp noise and Steve immediately called her name out in anger.

Sam’s eyes were on Steve, mouth hanging open. Steve unbuckled himself and slid all the way around to face Sam. 

“Why would you do that, Natasha?!” Steve said to her.

She shrugged, “I’m sorry! I just...you were skating around it and he was going to find out eventually! You said you’d be honest with everyone.”

“I was getting to it! Jesus! Don’t ever do that again.” he warned her.  
Natasha glanced at him apologetically and mouthed, “I’m sorry.”

Steve looked at Sam, who was still buckled in and wide eyed. “So….he’s your boyfriend now?” Sam asked, sounding a lot less calous than before. He sounded like a friend who generally wants to know.

Steve blushed and broke eye contact to rub his beard. “Um,” he chuckled, “not exactly. I mean I guess we would feel a little stupid using a label like that.”

Sam smirked a little, “Your serious face hasn’t changed since I got here. You just smiled for the first time because you are talking about you and him.” His smirk turned to a small smile, “So it was Bucky all along, huh?”

Steve was starting to smile a little more, “What was Bucky?”

“What makes you happy.” answered Sam.

Steve glanced at Natasha, who was already giving him a smile. 

“I guess so.” Steve answered.

“That’s excellent, man. I’m glad for you.” said Sam.

Steve stared at him with relief on his face, “Appreciate that.”

“People have been giving you shit for far too long.” Sam told him, “Besides, there’s something poetic about you two. He shot you 3 times, beat your face in, and you still didn’t give up on him. If that’s not love, I don’t know what is.”

Natasha snorted to herself. 

“Is that sarcasm?” asked Steve.

Sam chuckled and shook his head, “Nah man, I’m just playing around.”

Steve let out a deep sigh. He felt a lot better now they had all talked about his situation. He just wished it was a little less embarrassing.

They flew off to do their first mission as a trio.

……………………………..

Location:WAKANDA 

 

Bucky was finishing off his chores for the day in the evening sun. He was feeding the animals in a pair of pants and a dashiki top. There were chickens and goats bleating and bocking around him. 

Shuri was walking up the grassy path to where he was standing in the field in front of his hut. “Bucky!” she waved at him.

“Hey there.” he smiled, putting down the empty feed bucket on the grass to shake her hand.

“How are you?” said Shuri.

“Doing fine. Steve’s not with you this time by any chance?” he smiled.

“No.” she chuckled, “I am actually here because the prototype for your arm is ready for testing. You can come to my lab, I will have you back before dinner.”

Bucky’s face lit up, “Really? Fantastic.”

They hovered over to her lab to let Bucky lift and hit objects and test reflexes. She took the arm back off of him with promises of a few more improvements.

Bucky was walking back to his hut for dinner in the sunset, his phone went off. He was getting a call from Steve.

A smile appeared on his face immediately. “Hey punk.” he said as he answered.

“What are you up to?” asked Steve with a smile in his voice.

“Just tested my new arm. I am about to have some dinner with the neighbors. We’re having pork for the next week. Beto taught me how to roast a pig.” Bucky said, “How are you?”

“I’m okay. Just settled into our new safe house. I couldn’t sleep.” said Steve.

“What time is it there? Where to now?” 

“Um...about 1 in the morning. Myanmar.”

Bucky slowed his pace and looked around at the torches coming on in front of the huts. “Have you been eating okay? Getting used to another time change?” he asked.

Steve sighed, “Natasha has been forcing more protein onto my plates. There’s not that much of a time change. We just picked up Sam today, though. We also got a new assignment, so my mind’s been active.”

That made a small snort/laugh come out of Bucky, “Great.”

“I...talked to him about us.” said Steve real low.

“What did he say? I bet he was thrilled.” Bucky said.

“He was very supportive. I know he didn’t seem to care much for you but he hasn’t seen you since you’ve gotten better, Buck. He really is happy for us.” 

“I’ll take your word for it.” 

There was a pause. Steve cleared his throat, “I miss you.” He had this specific loving, soft tone when he said it. That was the tone Bucky never heard him use with anyone else, even the small children that lived in the village. It was protective almost, and special to him.

Bucky closed his eyes as his body felt warm all over, “I miss you too, Steve. When are you coming back?” 

“Like I said, this will be our first assignment with Sam. It will at least be a few more weeks so he can get the hang of it. After that, maybe I can come stay….for an entire week.” 

“Two more weeks, that’s….that’s 4th of July.” 

“It is, isn’t it?” Steve groaned.

“We got to do something for your birthday.” Bucky told him.

“No no...don’t make a fuss over me. I’m fine.” he insisted.

“Why not, Steve? You’re going to be 98. That’s pretty important.”

“Do NOT make me a birthday cake like your parents used to. It will burn down the whole village with that many candles.” chuckled Steve.

Bucky chuckled a little too, “No, I wouldn’t do that. You never liked cake anyway. I remember what you like. Let me do something for you. You deserve it, Stevie.”

Steve smiled at the old nickname resurfacing from the past. “Okay, sure whatever you want to do. I’m not going to stop you.” he told Bucky.

Kaarina stepped out of her home and spotted Bucky on the phone. She waved him over.

He yelled toward her he would be there soon in her native tongue. 

Steve recognized his use of Kaarina’s name, “You should go have dinner. I will text you tomorrow.” 

“Huh? No, it’s okay. I really wanted to hear your voice today.” Bucky told him.

“I don’t want to keep you, Buck. Really, I just wanted to hear your voice too. Tell the kids I said hi.” he insisted.

Bucky paused, “Okay. It was good talking. Check in with me.”

“I promise, Buck. Goodnight.” said Steve sweetly.

“Goodnight.” smiled Bucky before hanging up. As soon as he did, he felt a little more lonely without the comfort of Steve’s voice in his ear.

Ever since he left he felt empty, like his other half was somewhere else, which wasn’t entirely untrue.

Steve sat on his metal spring bed in a bleak white bedroom with a single tiny window. He shirtless and in pajama pants. His beard had grown in a little thicker and his hair started to get long enough to flip around.

He laid on his back and sighed. His phone began to vibrate. He looked down to see he had a missed call from Tony.

Steve sat up and examined his phone closer. What just happened?

The phone vibrated again to tell him he had a voicemail.

Steve put the phone to his ear to listen to it. There was noise of clinking glass on something hard and a few sounds of throat clearing. 

Steve deleted the message and stared out the window. He considered calling him back. Obviously, Tony drunk dialed him and backed out at the last minute. Would he call again?

The truth was, he missed him sometimes. He worried if Tony was taking care of himself, wondered if he was back to sleeping around. 

Steve couldn’t help it when he was alone with his thoughts so much.

Tony didn’t call back again.

……………….

 

Bucky woke up one morning to news that his arm was ready for fitting. He hurried to put on a tshirt Steve had left behind and a pair of pants. He was escorted to the lab by a guard and was greeted by Shuri. She showed him a fancy case with a shiny black and gold vibranium arm in it. 

This was not at all the same arm he had tested a few days before. 

“Wow.” said Bucky.

“Too flashy?” she asked.

“No, not at all. Slightly more shiny than before. It’s beautiful.” he said, looking it over and running his fingers over it in the case. 

“Go ahead and put it on.” Shuri said.

He locked it into place until the plates shifted themselves into a locked position. Bucky flexed his metal arms and moved it around in a rotating motion. 

She pulled out a tiny knife and glided the blade over the metal fingers, “Can you feel this?”

“I feel pressure, but not pain.” said Bucky.

“That’s excellent.” she smiled, “We just need to fight test it.”

“Fight?” stiffened Bucky.

“Just some sparring with a friend of mine. Would that be okay? In case you were to need it…” said Shuri.

“What friend?” asked Bucky.

“His name is M’Baku. He rules in a village up in the mountain tops. He is the bravest warrior I know. He isn’t scared of anything, so he will not be afraid to fight you.” she told him, keeping her tone light and pleasant.

Bucky looked around awkwardly and flexed his metal arm. “I don’t want to hurt anyone.” he said.

“No, of course not. This is strictly for training.” she promised.

After a pause, Bucky nodded, “Alright, where are we doing this?” he said.

Shuri showed him to the gym. 

After his training, he took off his arm and brought it back to his hut in the box. He didn’t see the need to wear it all the time just yet. He felt like he needed to ease himself into it.

The next day, he put on the vibranium arm for the afternoon when Kaarina and the children took Bucky to the market. He had a long sleeved shirt on as to not cause attention to it.

Oni kept marvelling at his metal hand, touching it and staring at how shiny it was. Bucky held her most of the trip as they walked. She loved the fact she could move around more freely and keep hold of her best friend now he had 2 arms.

While they were in the market, Bucky picked up some art supplies for Steve to surprise him on his birthday. When the children saw that, they insisted on getting art supplies too to make pictures for his hut.

That night they ate even more of the pork they had leftover. After dinner, Bucky settled into bed with his digital reader and took off his arm to place next to the bed. It was a lot more comfortable than his last one, but he still wasn’t okay with sleeping with it on yet.

Bucky fell asleep reading. He awoke to a vibration from his phone next to his head. He placed the tablet next to him and looked at the tiny digital time readout. It was 2 a.m. and Steve was texting him. 

Apparently Steve had just woken up and they had a nearly 6 hour time difference between them.

Bucky let his eyes adjust and sleepily read the message.

It said: “Good morning. I’m alive and well. Counting down the days until I see you. Will call tonight. Love, Your Punk” 

He smiled and flipped his phone closed. He heard noises suddenly from in front of his hut. Bucky shot up in bed and listened intently. There were definitely whispers. Even though he had picked up a lot of the native tongue quickly, these whispers were a different African language he couldn’t recognize.

He slowly clicked his metal arm into place and tiptoed over to his door to crack it. 

3 men in berets and military-type black uniforms, holding automatic rifles were standing in the field overlooking the huts. He recognized the way the man doing most of the talking was flailing his arms. They were strategizing an invasion.

He watched them closely, hunched down in the crack of his door to watch them move. Two more guys joined them. This was going to be a fight. 5 against one.

Bucky took a deep breath and waited until the five men settled into a sort of huddle. He snuck out of his hut, into a shadow and ran over to them, snatching a gun from a man with his back turned.

He rearranged himself away from the huts as they shot at him. He knocked out two men with a metal punch to the face. A third man shot at his metal arm, making a bullet ricochet off of it. Bucky shot him in the calf, causing him to fall in writhe in pain.

One guy left standing was backing away and shooting at Bucky. Bucky avoided each bullet with quick movements. Then he tackled him to ground and put him in a choke hold until he was unconscious.

People heard the shots and were stepping out of their huts suspiciously.

Bucky looked around quickly. Where did the last guy go?

He suddenly heard a child’s scream behind him. Tacitus, Kaarina’s second son was being dragged away by the man behind the huts. Bucky grabbed the sleeping man’s gun and ran after him. The man holding the boy also shot at Bucky, slowly backing away. 

Tacitus noticed him and screamed, “Buckyyy!”

The man turned his back to Bucky and ran faster. Bucky stayed still and aimed the gun carefully like in his old sniper days. He was slow and controlled with his movements as to not hit Tacitus.

One single shot went through the man’s thigh, making him fall immediately and drop face down into the grass. Tacitus broke free of his grasp and ran back toward the huts. Bucky turned on the gun safety and tossed it away to open both his arms. 

Tacitus hugged him and was pick up like he weighed nothing.

Bucky scanned all around the village, as most of the people were standing outside, surrounding the unconscious men in the field. There were no more left standing. Beto and Kaarina were outside, crying and looking worried with the rest of their neighbors. 

Kaarina spotted Bucky emerging from behind the huts, Tacitus still being carried.

 

Immediately everyone’s attention turned to them. Beto ran over to them and took his son from Bucky’s arms, “My boy! My boy is still here and alive!”

“What happened?” Kaarina asked Bucky, joining the hug between her husband and son.

“Bucky saved me, Mama.” said Tacitus, “He shot the Ugorha in the leg. He’s out there bleeding now!” He pointed behind the hut.

Kaarina and Beto pulled back and stared up at Bucky, wide eyed.

Bucky started to blush, feeling a little nervous. He didn’t like all the attention. He started to feel paranoid. They were going to find out about his past and kick him out of the village immediately, he just knew it.

Beto stood and looked up at Bucky, “Did you take down all these men yourself, in the dark?”

Chatter from the other members of the village behind them got softer.

Bucky’s eyes scanned over the little crowd then met Beto’s again. He nodded, “Yes.”

Kaarina and Beto looked at each other in surprise then back at him.

Beto suddenly hugged him. He had never actually touched Bucky before. Beto, the heavy set dark skinned man with a little grey in his hair, was also a hardened soft spoken man. He was too shy to even make eye contact with Bucky when he helped with the farm.

Now he was being embraced rather tightly. “You saved my boy. We are forever in your debt.” said Beto.

Bucky looked over at Kaarina, who was smiling at him, “Thank you, Bucky.”

He just stood there, mouth hanging open for a few seconds before he just nodded.

Kaarina called T’Challa and his guards came immediately to gather the “Ugorha” and imprison them.

The crowd had gone back to their huts, knowing they could sleep a little easier. Bucky was sitting on his porch still. It was about 5 a.m. He knew the sun would be coming up soon, so he stared in that direction, listening to the birds waking up. No way he was going back to sleep.

Kaarina came over to him with a sleeping Oni on her chest. “Are you alright?” she asked.

He nodded, “I’m fine.”

Kaarina sat next to him, getting his full attention. “Do you want to tell me how you fought all those men?” she said with almost a motherly knowing smile.

“Do you want to tell me who they were? Why did they try to take Tacitus? He called them….Ugorha?” asked Bucky.

“Yes, they are a terrorist group. They snatch young boys from villages. Most are never found.” said Kaarina, looking serious, “One of my own little brothers was taken from my old village when I was a small girl.”

Bucky shook his head in disgust, “I’m so sorry…”

“Tacitus was sleeping outside last night.” Kaarina told him, “That’s why they tried to take him. He fell asleep with his goats again. They pay attention to boys at his age, perfect for conditioning. One of them must have spotted him yesterday while we were in the market, followed him home.”

That struck a nerve deep inside Bucky. It made him think of his own abduction and brainwashing. 

She noticed his distant look, “Are you alright?”

He nodded, “I just can’t believe they would do that to helpless children.”

Kaarina looked him over. Bucky returned her gaze and looked over sleeping little Oni.

“How did you fight them?” she asked.

He sighed and thought how to word his response without giving her too much information or lying to her. “I um… I used to be a soldier.” said Bucky, “That’s where I learned to use a gun. Then I was taken by a terrible group of people too. They gave me my original metal arm and….held me captive, tortured me for...years but they did teach me how to fight. Eventually, I escaped. I am only here because King T’Challa took pity on me.”

Kaarina’s face was showing her pain, “Oh Bucky….I’m sorry I never asked you before.”

“It’s okay….” smiled Bucky, “Now you see why I don’t really talk about myself.” he joked.

There was a pause before she spoke again.

“Your actions tonight were brave. You...have been such a blessing to our family. Our own white wolf to protect us.” she said.

They looked at each other silently as he absorbed what she said. He was surprised by how good it felt to be needed and appreciated for something other than killing targets. He fought the bad guys without anyone dying. He did it for the greater good. Bucky was a hero now.

“I am blessed too, believe me.” he said. They chuckled together at how emotional they were getting as the sun started to rise and light up the village around them.

Kaarina shuffled Oni to one shoulder and awkwardly pulled him into a hug. Bucky accepted it, laughing under his breath.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is longer, sexier, and more emotional.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Please comment! Thank you!

Location: Wakanda

 

Bucky finally got a call from Steve saying he would be flying in.

“When?” he asked urgently.

“Tomorrow morning.” stated Steve happily.

“Do you know what time?” Bucky asked.

“Soon as I can, Buck. I will try to beat the sunrise.”

“I want you to be safe. You should get some sleep before.”

Steve scoffed, “No way I am getting any sleep knowing I’m going to see you.”

That made Bucky smile to himself. He sat on his bed, “I will leave my door unlocked for you. Come on in and wake me when you get here.”

“You got it.” said Steve.

The next morning, Bucky was sound asleep on his side, facing away from the door to his hut.

Steve slowly came in and quietly set down his bag and took off his shoes. He was in casual athletic shorts and a white t-shirt. Slowly, he padded over to Bucky sleeping soundly in his underwear.

The blanket was hovering around the curve of his ass.

Steve climbed into the bed as gently as he could. He put one arm around Bucky’s hips as he spooned him from behind. Bucky stirred and groaned softly. Steve pulled him into his chest and inhaled his scent deeply.

“Mmm...” Bucky smiled, not opening his eyes.

“Good morning. See? I beat the sun.” whispered Steve.

Bucky squinted at the dawn light shining through the window shutters, “You sure did.” He started to try and sit up.

“No no, don’t get up. We can go back to sleep.” said Steve, pulling him to lay back down and kissing his neck a few times. His hands spread over Bucky’s chest as they cuddled as close as possible.  
“I didn’t sleep either. I was too excited.” said Bucky. He went to roll over to face him but Steve held him too tight.

“C’mon, Steve. I want to see your face.” giggled Bucky sleepily.

Finally, Steve let go of him. He rolled over to see his bearded Steve with even longer hair and a pretty prominent black eye. Bucky couldn’t stop himself from gasping, “What happened to you?” 

Steve held him close by the waist with one arm, “I knew you would get worried if you saw my face. Should be fine in a day or two. Let’s just sleep, I will tell you about it later.”

“Give me the short version.” said Bucky, tracing his hand around the shape of the bruise and wincing.

“Bad guy jumped on Sam’s back while he was flying. The guy had a heavy part from a chop shop we infiltrated and he kind of...hit me with it.” said Steve, looking down over Bucky’s beautiful tan and sculpted chest.

“Wow.” Bucky said, raising his brows in surprise.

“It weighed like a ton. A normal person would have a crushed skull. I got lucky.” he replied, still not looking at him. Steve ran his hand around Bucky’s hip to his bare back, “I’m kind of embarrassed.”

Bucky blinks slowly at him, still feeling pretty tired. A smile came over his face, making Steve finally meet his gaze.

“What?” asked Steve.

“You’re still beautiful.” Bucky replied.

That made him roll his eyes and shake his head slightly. He still wasn’t used to smooth talking romantic Bucky. He loved it.

Steve pulled him into a slow kiss and rolled onto his back to pull him to lay on his chest.

They slept until the early afternoon.

Steve woke up first and started to massage his hands over the curve of Bucky’s neck and muscular back. He licked his lips in admiration. 

Bucky stirred and looked up at him, “Get enough sleep?” he mumbled, grunting and stretching a little.

“I think so. I’m starving though.” said Steve.

Bucky nodded, pouting slightly, “Alright. We could do something about that. Want to take some lunch down to the lake?”

“Sure.” he sighed.

Bucky got up and put on some pants. He bent down to the box next to his bed and pulled out his vibranium arm.

“Wow, look at that.” said Steve in awe, sitting up and looking him over from the bed.

Bucky came over to him and flexed his arm, “Yeah, it’s much lighter but still as strong as my old one. I’ve started to get used to it. Still don’t like sleeping with it on.”

Steve swung is feet onto the floor and reached out a hand to touch over the grooves of his arm. Bucky stood closer between his legs, looking over his face.

Steve’s other hand held the small of Bucky’s back and he made eye contact with him.

“It suits you. Way more than that last one you had.” said Steve.

That brought a content smile out of Bucky. Steve slowly stood and brushed his hair out of his face and put their foreheads together.

Bucky pulled back pleasantly before he could succumb to him, “C’mon let’s put some food together.”

He crossed his hut and opened his new mini fridge Steve didn’t notice before.

Steve also looked over his hut walls and noticed six lined up pictures drawn with crayons. He went over to examine them. They were mostly of Bucky and the kids, some had Steve in them. Most of the people in the drawings were stick figures.

“These are great.” smiled Steve. 

Bucky was loading food into a large tote bag. He looked over, “Oh yeah. The kids said I needed more ‘art’ in here.”

Steve chuckled at one picture where he was depicted with a small head, a gigantic muscular torso, and tiny legs. “This is my favorite.” he said, pointing.

“That one’s from Chidike. The kid is obsessed with how strong we are. He asks me questions all the time.” said Bucky, stepping closer to them.

Steve tapped a picture of colorful chaotic scribbles, “Lemme guess, an Oni original?” 

“You know it.” smiled Bucky, “She took forever too. She was very careful about her scribbling.”

“What about this one?” asked Steve, eyebrows furrowed, pointing at the picture at the top corner. It was of Bucky with his new metal arm, holding a gun, surrounded by bloody men in a field.

“Oh, that’s from Tacitus. It’s a long story. A lot has happened since the last time you were here. Let’s go to the lake.” said Bucky, putting the tote bag on his shoulder.

When they got to the lake, Bucky picked a spot under a shaded tree and put down a blanket. He sat down on it and started to unpack the food and beverages.

Steve kneeled down on the blanket at first, “Are we...having a picnic?”

Bucky handed him a sandwich and smiled, “Yeah, I guess so, why?”

Steve was handed a cola in a glass bottled, “I’ve never been taken on one before.”

While taking a bite of his sandwich, Bucky was looking out at the water. “Nice, isn’t it?” he asked with his mouth full.

Steve scooted over to lean against his side, “It’s perfect.”

When they finished eating, Steve leaned back and sipped his soda, “Alright...what was going on with that bloody picture?”

Bucky chuckled and rolled his eyes, “Is it that important?”

Steve touched his face so he met his gaze, “If something happened, you can tell me.” His expression was clear that he feared something happened due to Bucky’s triggers.

Bucky looked over his face and noticed Steve’s black eye was already healing.

He told Steve the whole story of the events with the terrorists. Steve’s face scrunched up with so much concern, he looked like he might explode.

Bucky stared back into the water and leaned back on his hands when he was finished. He waited for the long speech about how he didn’t have to stay here and he needed to try and stay closer to the palace, be more careful, but Steve stayed quiet.

He turned over the events in his head for a few minutes before lacing his fingers in Bucky’s flesh hand.

“I’m glad no one got hurt but the bad guys. Sounds like you protected the village, Buck. That’s fantastic.” Steve told him.

Bucky sighed happily with relief. He felt a warm bearded kiss press against his cheek.

“Kaarina was right, you were brave.” said Steve softly.

Bucky looked around them for prying eyes, “Stop…”

Steve smiled playfully, “What’s wrong?” He kissed Bucky’s cheek again, then his jaw, then his neck right in the spot Steve remembered drove him nuts.

“Steve…” laughed Bucky, unraveling their hands and nudging him weakly.

Steve let out a muted laugh against his neck. He kissed a little harder a few times on the sweet spot.

Bucky let out a moan and pushed him to sit back, “What’re you trying to do to me, huh?” 

They were smiling hazily at each other.

“I uh, didn’t tell you what happened after those guys got locked up…” said Bucky.

Steve’s face dropped.

“It’s fine, no, T’Challa was called to the village the morning after. He came in here and offered me a position on his anti-terrorism squad. ‘Said I’d be more than useful...” Bucky told him.

With a small nod, Steve asked, “And what do you tell him?”

“I said no.”

“Just like that?”

Bucky shrugged, “Yeah.”

“You didn’t tell him you would at least think about it?” asked Steve, cocking his head.

With a shake of his head, Bucky said, “I’m not working for anyone anymore, Steve. I’m done with all that. I’m finally a free man. The danger, the nightmares I already have from people being hurt…..I just want to be left alone to do something useful and positive.”

“Don’t you want to help people? Prevent more children from being taken?” said Steve gently.

“I’m not you, Steve….you know when I was recovered from MY accident, I wasn’t given CHOICE to join a force. I wasn’t given a choice to do ANYTHING for 70 years.” said Bucky, a little flustered. 

There was surprise and then sympathy spreading over his face.

Bucky took a deep breath and calmed his face. He reached over to hold Steve’s hand in his flesh hand, “I’m sorry. I just can’t deal with the violence anymore.”

Steve nodded slowly and squeezed his hand lightly, “It’s okay, I get it, Buck.”

“I mean, of course I want to help more children. It made me feel horrible to hear about them the way I did. So I told him if he ran into a tricky situation and he really needed me, he was allowed to come get me.” he said.

“Good. That’s a nice gesture.” assured Steve.

Bucky nodded silently, gazing out into the water. There was a noticeable layer of angst pulling at his features.

Steve rubbed his back a little, “You alright?”

“Always. You’re here with me.” Bucky smiled back sadly. He then looked around over Steve’s shoulder and noticed the kids coming to the water through the clearing.

“Steve!” a few of them said excitedly.

Steve turned to them and stood immediately, “Hey guys!”

\----------------------------------

The next evening, after a long day of Steve playing with the kids, Bucky had cooked for him for his birthday.

The hut was dimly lit by the little torches on the wall. There was soft jazz playing on Bucky’s tablet.  
Steve was sitting at the little table in Bucky’s hut as he watched him put down two dishes full of food.

“Here ya go. Baked ziti and Kaarina helped me make a plum tart.” announced Bucky, sitting down across from him.

Steve’s face was all lit up as he looked over the food. “All for you...well, us. Just don’t ask me for Birthday candles.” said Bucky, picking up his fork.

“Why’s that?” asked Steve.

“Fire hazard, genius.” joked Bucky.

Steve smiled and shook his head, “Everything looks….amazing, Buck.” He picked up his fork, “Thank you.”

Bucky nodded and stabbed the first bite and held it up to blow on it, “Uh’Course.”

Steve took a bit of ziti onto his fork ,wrapped the melted cheese around it a few times, and started to blow the steam off of it. 

Bucky smirked and held his own fork closer to Steve’s mouth, “Here, it’s already cool. You should have the first bite.”

Steve leaned forward and let Bucky feed him.

“Mmm!” groaned Steve, “It’s perfect.” he said with a full mouth.

“Really?” smiled Bucky.

“Mm!” he agreed, “Just like your Mom’s.”

Bucky opened his own mouth, leaning toward Steve’s hand. Getting the hint, Steve fed the bite on HIS fork to him. They gave each other sly smiles as they ate.

Bucky nodded with a furrowed brow, “You’re right, this is amazing. I’ve outdone myself.”

After they finished their dinner, Bucky put the dishes in a wash bucket he had. Steve sat on the bed, watching him clean up. Bucky turned to him with his hands behind his back, “Gift time.”

“I told you not to fuss over me.” laughed Steve.

“Hey, I did not fuss. Shut up and take your gifts.” said Bucky. He was handed a homemade birthday card from the kids. Steve opened it to see all of their sloppy signatures and pictures drawn all over it. Then Bucky handed him a few drawing books and utensils all wrapped together with some red yarn tied in a bow.

“Bucky…” he said, sounding touched, “This is so nice…” He started flipping through the small hand held pad and the two large ones, feeling the quality of the paper. 

“The small one is to take with you and the large ones are for keeping here. I thought since you haven’t drawn very much lately, this might inspire you to. Ya know, because this seems to be...your home now.” Bucky told him, sitting next to him on the bed. 

Steve smiled at him, almost as he was just realizing it. 

For a man who roamed aimlessly, this was absolutely the closest thing to a home he could have.

Immediately, Steve put the books on the table, out of the way. He sat back down across from Bucky and pulled him into a deep kiss, caressing his back softly and holding his head with the other hand.

Bucky smiled and sighed into his mouth, running his hands down his chest to grip his hips gently. Every time Steve was handsy and romantic, it still caught Bucky by surprise. 

“Happy Birthday, Punk.” whispered Bucky against his lips.

“I love you.” replied Steve, kissing him over and over, moving down to his neck.

It felt so natural by now to say that, like breathing. However, Bucky had trouble breathing at that moment.

Steve hands were strongly stroking against his spine, pushing him tightly against his muscular chest.

Bucky was pushed to lie on his back and dragged Steve on top of him to keep kissing that sexy bearded mouth. He heard Steve ask if he could take off his shirt. Bucky nodded, keeping his eyes closed.

He was suddenly shirtless. 

Steve was straddling him and instantly shirtless as well. Bucky admired the way his muscles glistened due to his recent sweating in the warm light. It got a little humid in that hut.

He licked his lips and shook his head slowly. Steve smirked down at him and moved to start kissing his chest.

Bucky pulled him back up for sloppy kisses. Their tongues swirled around one another roughly. It flipped a switch in Bucky when he felt Steve suck his tongue hard into his mouth. Steve had definitely learned some new moves.

A deep moan erupted from Bucky's chest and he kissed back harder and more breathlessly.

Bucky breathed, “Mmph, fuck me.”

Steve raised an intrigued eyebrow, “Haven’t heard you talk like that in a long time.”

Bucky blushed and his eyes started to shift, “Well...you gave me that mind blowing blow job last time you were here. I haven’t been able to get the feeling of you out of my head. I wake up every morning thinking about it, along with other things I want to do with you…” His eyes drifted back to meet Steve’s.

The look on Steve’s face became some sort of mix of being unsure and aroused. “Oh yeah?” whispered Steve, trying to be sexy and stern.

Leaning up to bite Steve’s lip gently, Bucky smirked, “Fuck yes, Stevie. Please? Make love to me like you used to.”

A bewildered laughed escaped Steve, “I mean...I’m not prepared t-”

“I’ve even.….I’ve already prepared for it earlier.” he said, laughing uncomfortably.

“Been planning this huh?” smirked Steve.

“Yeah, I found a shop in the market with some...tools I needed. I’ve been taking notes from the internet, I guess…” he shrugged.

“I’m glad you finally figured out the internet.” Steve said, rolling his eyes.

“Hush. Is that what you want too?...Do you think...are you ready?” asked Bucky.

Steve nodded and smiled, “I've been thinking a lot about you too, Buck. You have no idea. I...I’m ready if you are.” 

Bucky pulled him in for more kisses and started to slide down his own pants. He felt Steve’s hardness pressing against him. Bucky may have already stretched himself, but he still wasn’t sure how well he was going to take Steve’s huge super serum cock. It was a completely different size than when he was a scrawny boy.

Also, Bucky was nervous because he hadn’t had sex in 70 years, although the toys he used DID feel alright. 

Steve pulled off his own pants so the two of them were just in their underwear. 

Bucky leaned over and reached under his bed to grab a small bottle of lube. He pulled Steve down to wrestle with both of their tongues a little more. When they pulled back, Bucky asked him something he hadn’t heard since the 40’s in their camp. 

“How do you want me?” said Bucky, husky with arousal.

Steve stifled a moan at the question, looking over his gorgeous body. He moved himself between Bucky’s legs to pull off both of their underwear. “Just like this.” he answered.

Steve began stroking Bucky’s cock just how he liked, moving his thumb over his sweet spot.

“Mmmm.” moaned Bucky, tossing his head back, “Fuck.” 

Steve’s hand was a bit bigger and felt a lot better than his own hand. He pumped in a sporadic rhythm, slower then faster.

Bucky grabbed at Steve’s free hand but was pinned to the bed instead.

“Tell me what you want.” whispered Steve softly with a smirk on his face.

“S’your Birthday.” breathed Bucky, “What do YOU want?”

Steve let go of his dick and stared at him a little more heat in his eyes. He obviously needed to blow off steam from the mission he had just completed, there was pent up sexual tension, and excitement from the gorgeous man he loved in front of him, offering himself on a platter.

“You really want to know?” asked Steve, one eyebrow jutting up.

Bucky stared hard at him with his full attention and nodded.

Steve took a deep breath and let go of Bucky completely as he sat back on his feet. He grabbed his own cock in his hand and said unintentionally in his stern “Captain” voice, “I would like to feel your mouth around me and then let me make love to you….please.”

Drinking him in and shaking his head, Bucky gave him his sweetest smile. Old Steve was shining through again. The words were “politely dirty” just like old times.

Bucky sat up and immediately ducked his head down to start sucking Steve. Steve gasped at his immediate submissive eagerness and let a slow and low groan out of his throat. There was no time to waste.

Praying his research helped his technique, Bucky continued to bob his head on Steve’s cock, moaning around it to “make good vibrations” and keeping his teeth out of the picture.

His hands were holding onto Steve’s hips to steady his thrusts while he sucked.

“So amazing, Buck. How are you so good at th....mmph.” grunted Steve, running his hand gently over his cheek bone and through his hair. He kept trying to look down at him but the movements of Bucky’s mouth made him close his eyes every time. It was too good.

After being deprived of being touched for weeks, Steve wasn’t sure how long he could last.

Bucky felt a hand pat his shoulder gently but he just looked up at his face and kept sucking.

Steve shook his head slowly back and forth with his eyebrows furrowed, “I’ll be done soon if you keep on like that. Unghh.”

Bucky pulled back slowly all the way to the tip before kissing the tip and diving all the way back down until Steve’s dick touched the back of his throat.

“Huhhh...okay, okay.” Steve sighed, pushing him off gently.

It made a wet suction noise as Bucky sat back. He was smiling as he kissed up his chest to meet those pouty lips, which Steve kissed back gratefully.

“Lie back.” said Steve roughly.

Bucky lowered himself dramatically slow and continued staring into Steve’s big blue eyes. He watched him take the lube with one hand. After Steve poured it into his hand, he spread it all over his dick and moaned as it warmed a bit.

Bucky was lifting his ass and grabbing his ankles, trying to be as ready as possible, “C’mon Stevie…” he whimpered, knowing good and well it got to him.

Steve bit his lip and started to line himself up. Bucky gripped his shoulders tightly when he began to stretch him open and made a whispery whine noise.

“God….dammit.” sighed Steve when he finally was pushed all the way in. He stayed still inside him for a second, “It’s been so long…”

Bucky’s eyes were squeezed shut as he hugged Steve closer to him. Steve kissed him softly to get him to relax.

“You still feel so good...” whispered Bucky, “You can move now.”

When he felt him loose tension around him, Steve started a slowly gentle rhythm in and out of him. Bucky heard Steve’s breathing become shaky above him as he kissed his neck roughly.

Their rhythm picked up speed a little and Bucky had to cover his own mouth to stifle a scream when his prostate was struck.

Steve looked into his face intently, loving his reactions. He searched for that sweet spot with his dick again and again, encircling his arms around Bucky.

Bucky rolled his head back and pulled his mouth into a hard line to stifle his noises. His hands were clamping Steve’s big shoulders. 

Steve reached down to jerk Bucky off while he fucked him. He’d always wanted to try it.

“Oh God, oh...godohgod.” moaned Bucky softly in his ear.

Steve felt him clench around him, “You feel amazing, Buck.” he whispered.

“I c-can’t keep….ungh...I’m gonna….”

Steve smiled adoringly and slowed his thrusts, pausing longer against his prostate.

 

Bucky shivered all the way down his body and pulled Steve down for more kisses as he released between both of their chests. The clenching Steve felt made him moan long and loud into Bucky’s mouth.  
He silenced himself with his teeth on his lip and his thrusts quickened. 

“Ungh ungh ungh,” Bucky moaned in unison with their bodies colliding, “that’s it, Stevie...let go for me.”

Steve buried his face into Bucky’s neck with a groan and finally erupted, buried deep inside of him. 

The feeling of being filled up shook Bucky to his core and he moaned and shuddered with a grin.

“Oh God...Buck…”Steve whimpered, kissing his shoulder and panting in his ear.

“Mmm, I know. I’m right there with you.” mumbled Bucky rubbing the back of his neck softly, “I missed this....”

Steve hugged him tighter and squeezed his eyes closed.

\--------------------------------------

After a little less than week visit, 5 days in to be exact, Steve and Bucky were playing soccer with the kids outside when Steve’s phone rang.

A couple of other little boys from the village where there to play too.

They were all alternating in drape robes and shirtless in shorts to separate the teams. The boys were playing in the sunny field until they noticed Steve answer the phone and walked toward the hut. 

A few moans and complaints were shouted toward him.

“Hey just practice a little bit, guys. Steve’s busy.” said Bucky, kicking the ball to Chidike.

Bucky gave the boys words of encouragement as they kicked the ball back and forth to each other. He was completely distracted by Steve on the phone behind him, staring at his face from a few yards away, trying to read his expression.

He only had that flip phone for when he was absolutely needed.

A tight knot twisted in Bucky’s stomach.

The soccer sped over to hit Bucky’s leg but he blocked it last minute. Bucky picked it up in fake anger, “Alright, who threw that?”

They all giggled at him, pointing their fingers aimlessly.

He smiled and shook his head, “Kick it to each OTHER.” He kicked the ball back and they chased it around.

Bucky looked back at Steve who was saying goodbye on his phone as he approached.

“Hey.” smiled Steve.

“Something wrong?” asked Bucky.

Steve’s face dropped, “Technically no, but we haven't weighed all our optio-”

“Steve.” Bucky said sternly, telling him to cut the shit.

“Alright, how about we go in the hut for a minute.” said Steve, ushering him alongside him.

The boys started to yell at them in protest.

“You still have enough for teams, guys. It’s okay.” said Steve over his shoulder.

The two men were shirtless and wearing cargo shorts, looking a little sweaty from the soccer game.

They closed the door behind them in the hut and sat on the bed across from each other.

“That was Natasha who called.” said Steve.

Bucky wiped the sweat off his face, “I figured. So you need to leave, right?” he said flatly.

“She heard a tip about a new nazi terrorist attack. Before that happens, we need to-”

Bucky shook his head and interrupted him, “I don’t need to know, it's okay.” 

Steve sighed but took his hand, “Buck, please don’t be upset.”

With a sad chuckle, Bucky said “I’m not…” He stood to pace a little, “I just...wish I would know how long I was going to wait for you each time…you go.”

“Take it easy.” said Steve, worry showing all over his face.

Bucky’s eyes were shifting, his metal arm was whirring. He ran his flesh hand through his hair, "I'm sorry. Things have been so good with you here, but I can't relax and spend time with you because I'm constantly wondering when you will be taking off again. I can't relax when you are gone because you are probably in constant danger. I was supposed to get 2 more days. I-I mean, don’t get me wrong, I like it here. I've made friends and everything so I'm not alone, but....I-I’m still…..I’m lonely, Steve."

Listening to his painful words, Steve chewed his lip with concern.

"I'm just not ready to say goodbye.” Bucky whimpered.

Steve rushed over to him and pulled him into a hug. He could tell tears were bubbling behind his eyelids. “Hey, hey hey. C’mere. I got you.” he said softly.

Bucky’s breathing was heavy and slightly staggered. 

He hugged Steve back, but kept mumbling quietly, “I just don’t like the uncertainty, Steve. You have such a small team now. You have no back up...sometimes I don’t hear from you for days at a time. You showed up here with a black eye, for Christ’s sake. What if your next mission leaves you much worse off? I get so worried I’ll lose you again-”

“It’s okay, it’s fine. Just stop. I don’t have to go right now.” said Steve.

Bucky pulled back and looked at him, his breath started to calm. “What?” he said in a small voice.

“Yeah, maybe I’ll stay a few more days. I promised you that much and we don't even know if this tip is credible anyway...” Steve told him, keeping his arms around Bucky’s back. 

“Steve, don’t do that. Don’t put your team in danger because of me. I can’t make you do that.” Bucky said, shaking his head.

Steve put his hands on either side of his face to hold it still, “I’m not.…” he said softly, “you aren’t making me do anything.”

Bucky rolled his eyes, “Just go, Steve. Don’t worry about it, I'm just being crazy.”

“No....no don’t even say that.” Stever sternly. His expression and tone softened, “Buck, you know me,” 

Bucky looked over his crooked smile as Steve continued,“I like to be where I am needed and I’m needed right here.” 

He was trying to get him to smile back, but only got Bucky to calm a little.

When Bucky obviously went to protest again, Steve kissed him to shut him up. He kept their foreheads together when he pulled back. 

“How about this, I will stay for one more day and only leave a day early, alright?” Steve said softly, "I won't have to go tomorrow but I won't leave my team out to dry. Then my next visit will be even longer. Sound okay?"

Bucky pulled his head out of Steve's hands and stood back a little to look into his eyes. There was a silent pause. They could hear the boys playing soccer in the distance.

Steve touched the spot between Bucky's neck and shoulder like he always did and squeezed, "Does that sound alright to you?" he repeated.

“I don’t know...don’t make me decide when you leave so you don’t have to be the bad guy, Rogers-” 

Steve shook his head, “Buck,” his voice was gentle and friendly, “I’m not. I’m asking you if we can compromise.”

He stared into his eyes with a subtle smile.

There was old tiny Steve again. That face was the expression he used to make every time Bucky did something thoughtful for him. It melted him almost every time.

Bucky was breathing deeply to himself but he nodded his head, "Fine."

Steve pulled him into another hug and rested his chin on his shoulder, finally getting him to hug back completely.  
\------------------------  
2 mornings later, Bucky woke up to an empty bed and his tablet set upright next to him.

He looked around the hut and noticed Steve's duffle bag was gone. He'd left without saying goodbye. 

They’d stayed up late the night before. Every time Bucky dozed off, he would jolt awake and grab at Steve to feel if he was still there.

Steve would touch his arms softly wherever he was clinging to and murmur, “Sleep, Buck.”

Eventually deep REM sleep took him over. James Barnes was and always had been the world’s hardest sleeper. Curse his body for letting him sleep through Steve leaving.

Bucky's stomach sank and he let out a deep sigh. His flesh hand ran through his hair and he willed himself not to cry. 

Why wouldn't he wake him up on his way out? 

He reached for his tablet to turn it off but it was glowing with a video ready to be played. The video icon showed a still of Steve.

He sat up straight, composed himself, and pressed play. 

The video was much earlier that morning before the sun rose. Steve was all dressed in his stealth suit and gloves, ready to go, pacing the hut.

"Hey Buck." said video Steve, "I know you are probably mad at me. I don't want to wake you up though, look at you." The camera angle moved to show Bucky's sleeping form in bed.  
"You're sleeping like you're in cryo again, pal." said Steve with the camera panned back to him, "I wanted to wake you to say goodbye, but, to be honest, if you were awake...I don’t think I could’ve made it out the door." he chuckled.

A smile escaped Bucky as he watched the video.  
"I wanted to make sure you could see me and hear my voice whenever you wanted, so that's why I'm leaving this message and…” he reached into his suit harness and pulled out his pocket art notebook, “I got my pad, I plan on using it. You really gave me a fantastic birthday, Buck. Thanks again.” 

He slipped the book back into his suit, “Listen, when I am gone, I want you to remember how much you are needed and wanted here. These people in your village, they love you. I do too. You mean the world to me." said Steve, looking right into the camera with his deep blue eyes.

 

"You are part of the reason I fight. You taught me how...and I have someone to come home to, who understands. That's all I could need." Steve said. The video panned back down to Bucky sleeping.

Steve leaned down and kissed sleeping Bucky's cheek.

Bucky smiled and touched his face as if he could feel it. "Anyways...." smiled Steve, "I'll see you soon, jerk."

The video ended and Bucky put down the tablet. He felt a little less betrayed, but still pretty sad he didn't get a chance to say his goodbyes.

The tablet started to chime as Shuri called him.

“Good Morning, Bucky.” she said as the hologram of her head appeared above the tablet.

“Hi Shuri. How are you?” said Bucky.

“Would you like to come to my lab for some sparring? M’Baku said he would love to rematch.” she told him, “That is, if you feel like it. I know Captain Rogers left this morning.”  
“That’s fine. Just give me a few minutes.” he said.

They disconnected and he turned off the tablet.

When Bucky stood and went over to his trunk to put on some clothes, he found a drawing from Steve on top of it. The drawing was a depiction of Bucky sleeping on his side naked. The blankets and pillows were all barely covering his private parts.

He smiled to himself and tucked it away in the back pocket of his trunk.  
\-----------------------------------------  
Location: Croatia

Steve, Sam, and Natasha had finished foiling the plans of the nazi group and had turned them over to authorities. 

They were all heading back to a sketchy apartment with only 2 beds that they had to share. The vehicle they had to use was a small pick-up truck with only 3 seats. Steve was squeezed between Sam and Natasha as she drove.

Sam was dozing off. They had scouted out the nazi location all night and didn't catch the bad guys until the sun started to rise.

Natasha looked over at Sam snoring against the window of the truck.

"Hey Steve." she said softly.

"Hmm?" he said, staring through the windshield, also feeling tired.

"I got an interesting call while you were gone." she replied.

His eyes cleared and he sat up straight and looked at her, “Tony?”

“Pepper, actually.” said Natasha, glancing over at him.

Steve’s eyes widened, “What did she want?”

“She invited me to her and Tony’s wedding. It’s next year.” 

Steve’s gaze drifted back to the windshield. His look was distant as he processed what she just said.

“Really?” he said, sounding like he was in disbelief.

“Yeah, she asked me to ask you but I told her I didn’t think you would want to go. Since Tony and you haven’t spoken...right?” she said.

Steve shook his head, “No...he drunk dialed me once, but I didn’t catch it.”

Natasha sighed and could see the look of sadness on his face, “I’m sorry, Steve. This was pretty soon and unexpected, but I thought you should know. Apparently Tony didn’t tell Pepper about the phone. She found it and called me in secret. Said she misses us…”

“I see.” he said, still staring off into the distance, “It wasn’t really sudden. He’s been planning on marrying her for a while but they kept splitting up.”

“Well, I don’t think I am going to go anyway. I kind of played both sides during our ‘falling out’ and he KNOWS you are working with me. I doubt Tony would want to see me.” she said.

“He can’t stay mad at you.” said Steve, shaking his head, “You didn’t betray him and hold back the truth from him like I did.” 

“Yes I did.” she chuckled, “May I remind you that I found that mission report in that nazi bunker with you? I knew too.” 

“Fair enough, but you know it was a bigger betrayal on my end.” Steve told her, “You should go if you want.”

Natasha shook her head, “We can’t go to formal events while we are on the run anyway. We shouldn’t even send gifts. Pepper just wanted to extend an invitation to be nice and let us know we are welcome.”

Steve sighed, “Yeah, I guess.”

She looked him over and his head was hanging low, staring at his lap.

“You okay?” she said.

Steve didn’t want to admit his jealousy, devastation, and sadness to himself. He definitely wasn’t going to admit it to her aloud, even though she could read it all over him.

“I will be fine.” said Steve.

She rubbed his shoulder comfortingly with one arm. He smiled back at her.

“You got something better now, Cap.” she assured him.

Steve nodded, looking back down at his lap, “You’re right, I do.” 

“Speaking of, how is Bucky?” she asked.

“Fantastic. Although, I think he is mad at me.” said Steve.

“Why would he be?”

“I left without saying goodbye.” 

Natasha looked at him in disbelief, “Why would you do that?”

Steve looked out the windshield again as he spoke, “When you called, I tried to leave early. He freaked out, almost had a panic attack. He couldn’t handle it. I need to start staying longer.”

“You can’t just run away from him when he has issues. You got to be supportive, Steve.” she insisted.

“I know that, okay! I left a video message for him instead.” he said, “I stayed with him another day and everything, but….honestly, saying goodbye to him is getting harder.”

“Have you talked to him since you left a day ago?” asked Natasha.

“No…” he sighed.

“Steve!” she groaned, nudging him.

“I know! I have been texting him, but he hasn’t responded with anything longer than one word.” said Steve, looking anxiously through the window, “I hope he isn’t mad for long. I really miss his voice.”

She gave him a sympathetic look, “We don’t have to be working constantly, ya know. It’s not our job anymore anyway. We are free lancers. You deserve a break anyway.”

“I always feel like I need to be doing my part, you know that. Why else would I have all this strength and power? It’s my calling.”

“Still not your job forever, Steve.”

He sighed, “Agree to disagree.”

“The world lived years without you around. You don’t think you can take breaks here and there. Not the week or two you have been taking, but like a month? A year?” she asked.

“I can’t do that.” he said, shaking his head.

“Sure you can. How about this, why don’t me and Sam come with you to Wakanda next time and you stay for at least a month? That way we are all in the same place and we all get a break. Sam and I have never been before.” said Natasha.

Sam stirred in his sleep and snorted.

Steve considered it, “Hmm, I will talk to Bucky about it...hopefully.”

“Call him tonight.” scoffed Natasha.

\----------------------------------------

Location: Tony’s lab in the Avenger’s facility

 

It was late at night. 

Tony had a rough day, tons of meetings and questions he had to answer about the Avengers. 

It made him really miss the old group and wonder if they were even WERE Avengers anymore..

He was sitting at his desk looking through holograms of old files.

There were pictures, articles, and videos of the old Avenger’s group from when they originally came together.

The only remnants of his friends and what they used to be.

Tony found himself worrying about Bruce and wondering if he had left on purpose because he hated himself and knew this kind of group could never last.

As he looked over the pictures, he found himself zooming in on Steve’s face the most. He missed that face, that jawline...the way he looked disapproving when Tony said something crude. He even realized he missed the arguments they used to have.

“Just call him.” he thought, then, “I can’t do that. I can’t ever ever do that unless it is a life or death situation.”

Tony watched the body cam footage on his suit of the alien attack in New York. Steve was squatting over him and said “We won.” Then came that radiant 1000 watt sideways smile of his.

“Fucking shit.” murmured Tony, fighting back tears and reaching into his box on his desk to pull out a joint and light it.

He paused the video on that smile and stared as he exhaled smoke.

Tears appeared in his eyes. The realization had begun to hit him over the last few weeks when he and Pepper held a press conference and announced their engagement to the world.

Now Pepper was talking to him about wedding invitations.

It was really happening, and that meant he could never have Steve ever again. He wanted to be with someone he loved that made him happy, and Pepper definitely met the criteria. She knew everything about him and still was willing to be with him and give him second chances whenever he didn’t deserve them.

Pepper already took care of him, practically ran his life, and always knew what was best for him.

He kept trying to shake Steve out of his head, nothing ever worked.

Tony started to pace his lab, smoking his joint and staring at the image of Steve as if he was really there.

“Why did you keep so many secrets from me, you fucking liar? And why didn’t you own up to them? Why couldn’t you have stayed?” he asked aloud at the hologram, “How is running away from your problems a way to solve them?”

He dragged his joint and ran a hand through his hair.

Tony wanted a drink. He hated that he had to quit alcohol completely since he and Pepper moved back in together. He proved he quit by getting rid of his stash in front of her. 

“Thought you were braver than that.” he said to the hologram, “Dad always talked about how you were the most honest, bravest, the strongest and the most level headed….why’d you do this? Why couldn’t you have listened to me?”

He realized he looked insane, talking to a hologram. 

Friday spoke up, “Boss, Ms. Potts is calling.”

Tony sighed and noticed that his joint had gone out on it’s own due to negligence.

He touched his headset and answered her call, “Hey hun.”

“Friday said you were still at the lab, Tony. Is everything okay?” Pepper said immediately.

“I’m fine. You aren’t home right now, so I don’t want to be there alone.” Tony said, “Besides, I’m working.”

Pepper sighed, “Working on what?”

“A project. I’m fine, Pepp.” promised Tony.

“I’m just worried about you. You didn’t call after your meetings today.” she said.

“It’s all okay.” said Tony, “Really, just go to bed. Enjoy your trip. You have more meetings in the morning.”

“Okay...but you know I will be back home the day after tomorrow. Please tell me if I need to come home early for any reason, okay?”

“Honestly, Pepper, you are smothering me. I’m not a wee little baby. I’m a big boy.” he joked.

“Stop, you know I love you. That’s why.” said Pepper.

“I know. I love you too.” said Tony.

They disconnected and Tony lit his joint back up and went back to staring at Steve’s holographic face.

He walked back over to his desk and sat on the rolling stool. He straightened his black tank top he was wearing before re-lighting his joint.

Continuing to smoke down to the filter, he finally snubbed it and turned back to the picture of Steve.

“We could have been happy. You tricked me into thinking you wanted to be. Fucking asshole…” he muttered, turning off the hologram and putting his head in his hands.

After a minute of him silently crying into his hands, he heard his name being called behind him.

He turned around immediately to see Rhodes standing in the doorway of the lab.

“What the hell are you doing here at 1 in the morning?” laughed Tony, trying to make it seem like he was not just having a breakdown.

“Pepper told me to come check on you.” said Rhodes, looking him over and noticing his bloodshot eyes, “I can see why.”

Tony shook his head, “I’m fine. I told her that. I don’t need a babysitter.”

“I’ve known you for 30 years, Tony. I know when you are not okay. Don’t lie to me.” sighed Rhodes, looking sympathetic and stepping closer to him, “I smell the stagnant weed smoke in here. What’s wrong?”

“Don’t tell Pepper. I told her I quit everything, but I only quit drinking.” said Tony, wiping his face and walking over to the oversized couch.

“Scout’s honor.” Rhodey told him, holding up his hand, and following him over to the couch.

They sat down together.

With a friendly hand to the shoulder, Rhodey said, “So what’s going on? Talk to me.”

Tony realized a few more tears were forming and falling down his face as he tried to think up a lie.  
“It’s just...my old bullshit. Bad memories, trauma, depression. It will pass.” he said.

“No it’s not. C’mon, Tony. It’s me. You can tell me anything.” prodded Rhodey.

“It’s just so stupid. It’s not worth sharing.” said Tony, shaking his head and wringing his hands.

There was a silence. Rhodey took back his hand and crossed his fingers. They looked around the lab awkwardly for a moment.

“Is this about Steve?” Rhodey suddenly asked, making Tony snap his head back at him in surprise.

“What?” asked Tony as if it were a ridiculous question.

Rhodey just stared at him casually, “You miss him, don’t you?”

“I can’t miss someone who was never my friend to begin with.” snapped Tony.

“Of Course he was your friend.”

“Once you lie to me for years about my parents’ death, you are no longer a friend.”

Rhodey nodded, “I get it...but you still miss him. You just don’t want to.”

Tony squinted at him like he knew nothing, “He betrayed me, I don’t-”

“I know.” said Rhodes, holding up his hands.

Tony rolled his eyes, “No you don’t. You can’t possibly.”

“No, Tony….I know. I know what happened with you and Steve.” Rhodey said with a cautious flinch.

Tony’s eyes widened, “You what?”


	11. Chapter 11

Chapter 11:

 

Location: Tony’s Lab, Avengers Compound

 

Tony was facing Rhodes on his large, bed-like couch. He was digging his palms into his thighs nervously as he tried to investigate Rhodes’ comment without giving too much away.

“What is that supposed to mean?” Tony shrugged, “Everyone knows what happened with me and Rogers. He wouldn’t sign the accords, he was defiant of all of us and got you shot out of the sky-”

“No, no. That’s not what I’m talking about.” interrupted Rhodey, “ C’mon Tony….I saw the signs.”

Continuing to play dumb, Tony was extra dramatic and even laughed bitterly and rolled his eyes, “Rhodey, what signs? I’m lost.”

With a head tilt and a straight face, Rhodey said, “You had feelings for him, didn’t you? Am I right?”

Tony’s face washed over with devastation. His eyes threatened to water as he realized he was going to have to relive the horror of another person discovering this. Natasha knowing was more than enough, even if she wasn’t around anymore.

His sadness turned to anger. “The fuck did you just say?” spat Tony.

Rhodes shook his head, “You heard me. I saw how you looked at him. I hadn’t seen you look at someone like that since Jessica Bernstein in college, and well, Pepper....Also I know how you acted when Jessica broke your heart. It’s been kind of like you are….17 year old, heart broken Tony again.”

Tony looked at him like he was still denying everything he was saying. 

Shifting a little closer to him, Rhodes said, “I won’t say anything to Pepper. I promise. I just want to help you get past it….just like we did back in college.”

With a sigh, Tony’s body slumped forward. He was staring at his lap, willing the tears not to come. He could NOT give himself over to his emotions.  
A tear fell down his cheek, then another. 

“Aw Tony…” Rhodes said softly.

“Okay. Okay…” he sniffed, “You got me.”

“I wasn’t trying to make you admit I’m right. It’s all okay, man.”

Tony felt so relieved by that and it showed on his face.

“Besides, I know so much about you already. You’ve done way weirder things than fall for a 100 year old super soldier.” said Rhodes, smiling slightly.

Tony squinted at him, stifling a chuckle that he couldn’t help but let go.

Rhodes laughed too, shaking his head. 

When their smiles faded, Tony ran a hand through his hair, “How did you figure it out? No one else knows, right?”

 

“No. And I pretty much figured it out way back before you broke up with Pepper the last time.”

“What? When?”

“Well, we had gone out drinking in the city. It was late, remember? You called a car service and when you got in you gave the driver Steve’s address right in front of me. Then you just said goodbye to me through the open window, took off. You didn’t even realize I heard you. You were really drunk.” 

Tony flinched as he recalled showing up at Steve’s apartment and making love to him.

“Good thing I stopped drinking.” he sighed.

“Good thing Happy had stepped away before I put you in the car.” said Rhodes.

“You sure Natasha didn’t tell you?” squinted Tony.

“Natasha? Tony. even when she was around she never told me anything. How does she know?” 

“Her and….him were so close. She also was trained in noticing every detail of fucking EVERYTHING. It’s so annoying.” sighed Tony.

“I kinda miss her too. Haven’t gotten to speak to her since she ran off with Steve...” Rhodes said, glancing down at his hands.

“What do you mean she ran off with Steve? They’re definitely together? You heard from her recently?” 

Rhodes looked up at Tony, frozen. 

“No. I just meant I’m just ASSUMING Nat is with Steve since….ya know we haven’t heard from the two of them since Germany and they broke out of the pris...”

“No no no…you sound so sure. Have you heard from them?” asked Tony, standing.

“Well…”

“Yes?” 

Rhodes sighed, “Pepper called her.”

“What? How?” gasped Tony.

“She knows about your flip phone.”

Tony scoffed, “Oh great, and how does she know about that? Huh?”

“She asked! I was there when you got the thing. She just called Natasha to invite her to your wedding. Pepper probably thinks she can use your event as a way to bring you guys back together to make up and be friends again or something….I’m sorry. I can’t talk Pepper out of things. She’s...scary. Way scary enough to handle being your wife.” rambled Rhodey.

Tony crossed his arms in frustration.

There was a long pause.

“Is Nat….so Nat did say she WAS with Steve then?” Tony finally said.

“Yeah. They’re freelancing.”

“Good...I guess. That suits them. Are they still wanted?” 

“Not necessarily. I have gotten General Ross to back off. I played the handicapped card. Got em right where I want them.” said Rhodey, pointing to his robot leg braces.

Tony went to ask another question but dismissed it before he let it come out of his mouth.

“Steve’s fine, Sam is with them too.” said Rhodes with a knowing smile, “I think they’re all pretty happy.”

Tony nodded and looked down at his shoes to avoid crying again.

“Pepper and I didn’t want to keep secrets, we just trying to look out for you, Tony. She didn’t want to say anything in case the phone call didn’t go well. I don’t think they are even thinking of coming to your wedding anyway. It doesn’t even matter that she called....”

He lifted his head to meet Rhodes’ gaze. “Yeah? I just don’t like people keeping things from me anymore. I fucking hate it. I haven’t even used that phone yet.” 

Rhodes’ brows dropped, “Not once?”

“No. I want to so much. I want to hear his voice but I am trying to get past that and move on with my fucking life.” Tony sighed, “I’ve even thought about breaking it.”

“Don’t do that, Tony. We might need him for real next time there’s something we can’t handle. Just give it to me if you don’t want-”

“I just said I thought about it, not that I was going to.”

“Why haven’t you tried to at least talk to him? It’s been months,”

“Because I’m not…” Tony ran both hands nervously over his beard to meet in a prayer position under his chin, “I’m not ready to deal with him. I can’t talk to him because I will realize I still love him, I’ll try to forgive what he did to me.... I’ll hate myself for it….yadda yadda. He makes me weak. I need to be realistic, move on, man up, and fucking deal.”

Rhodes didn’t say anything. He just gave him a sympathetic look.

Tony dropped his hands to his sides with a huff, “I know….I just need time. I haven’t had enough yet, that’s all.”

\--------------------------------------------  
Location: Wakanda

 

It was dusk and the sun started to set. Bucky was herding goats back to Kaarina’s and Beto’s fence. His phone, which was always attached to him somewhere, began to ring. He reached into his pocket with his one arm.

“You answered.” said Steve cheerily.

“Of Course I did.” Bucky said, sounding a bit breathless from chasing goats for the past 20 minutes.

“Is this a bad time? I wondered if you were mad at me.”

“I’m just finishing up for the day, and I could never be mad at you, Steve.” scoffed Bucky, chuckling a little, “Even though you didn’t say goodbye then you didn’t call for a few days either…”

“Aw Buck, I’m really sorry. I left the video and I’ve been texting.” 

“You did, and that video was very thoughtful. You know I hate to text. Next time call sooner.”

“I wanted to give you your space in case you were mad honestly.” Steve whined.

“You know for a fact the last thing I want between us is space.” 

“You’re absolutely right. Sorry again.”

Bucky could hear the sincerity in Steve’s voice and decided not to play that chord any longer.

“It’s okay. If you are really sorry, you will come back right now and fuck me in the lake.” joked Bucky, walking into his hut for some privacy.

That got a slightly aroused laugh out of Steve, “As much as I want to, I can’t right now, however, that’s why I called. I want to come back to you soon….for a month.”

“Oh really?”

“Yeah, absolutely. No leaving early, no worries. A whole month.”

“Mhm, sounds nice….what’s the catch?” 

“Buck, do you have to….”

“Don’t got all night. What’s the catch, Rogers?” he pressed with a stern voice.

Steve huffed, “Okay, Natasha and Sam want to come stay there too. They don’t have to stay in your village or anything, we just want to at least be in the same country when we take a break for that long. Does that sound alright?” 

Bucky was quiet and thoughtful for a minute before speaking. 

“You there?” Steve asked.

“Yeah, I just….” Bucky stammered, “Wakanda is like our place, Steve. It’s our home. You want to bring the Widow here and Sam, who….isn’t the biggest fan of me.”

“They are excited to see how much better you are. I promise everything is fine. Natasha has made it perfectly clear she has no hard feelings against you. The guys, they see how happy you make me, they know how far you’ve come.”

Bucky exhaled deeply as he sat at his little dining table, “You could just be buttering me up.”

“No I am NOT…” Steve sighed, “Trust me? Okay? You will get to have me around for so much longer if I could just bring my team. They’re also my friends. Some of my only friends left. You’re not the soldier anymore. You’re...their friend and leader’s boyfriend now.”

Bucky laughed, “Boyfriend? Get outta here with that.”

“Yeah technically. S’what Sam calls you because he knows I hate it.”

“Boyfriend sounds ridiculous.” Bucky said with a smile in his voice. 

“I know, okay?” snorted Steve, “Listen, you yourself said you didn’t want me to ever put them in danger over you.”

“Already throwing that in my face…”

“C’mon Buck. Be reasonable.” he sighed.

He huffed and puffed dramatically but finally agreed. They set a date soon for them to come. Bucky just had to clear it with the royal family first.

 

\---------------------------

 

A few weeks later, Bucky was lifting weights in the gym under Shuri’s lab.

Steve was to show up with Sam and Natasha later that afternoon.

Shuri sauntered in, tablet in hand. When she noticed Bucky lifting weights she paused and smiled. 

"Hello! How are you this morning, Bucky?" 

He set down the dumbbells and nodded, "Pretty good. Is M'Baku coming today?"

"No...T'Challa will be joining us actually. He needs to train with someone strong enough, such as yourself."

Bucky met her gaze and noticed she was giving him an amused smile.

"Something wrong?" He asked, raising an eyebrow. 

"Not at all... just, who braided your hair?" She giggled. 

He had a half-up French braid hairdo. 

Bucky rolled his eyes, "Kaarina's daughter. I told her to just keep it outta my face...I feel ridiculous..."

Bucky was already reaching up with his metal arm to unravel his hair. 

"No no no. You look fine. I'm sorry for laughing." Shuri smiled, holding a hand out toward him, "Please keep them."

He smirked and grabbed a towel off the bench next to him to wipe his face. 

"Isn't Captain Rogers arriving today?" She asked, looking down at her tablet. 

"Yes, should be about mid-day."

"He's bringing his team along this time also, huh? Sounds fun. I can’t wait to meet them."

 

Bucky drank some water from a nearby fountain and nodded shortly.

“You are not?” she asked, looking him over, “You are scared he won’t give you all of his attention this time because his friends will be here?”

 

He rolled his eyes, “No...I just...didn’t really have a great time with the ‘team’ last time we were together. I threw Natasha across a room and Sam also was blown up because of me….”

“None of that matters now.” dismissed Shuri, shaking her head, “They are coming here for a vacation, Bucky. They were probably jealous Steve got to come here to freaking paradise while they had to stay in a snowy tundra waiting around for him to come back. Quit feeling sorry for yourself all of the time.”

There was a pause between them. Shuri shifted her eyes to the floor when she realized how rude she could have just been with her statement. When she looked back up it wasn’t anger but humor in his eyes.

“You remind me so much of my mother, Shuri. You’re young but wise beyond your years. Thanks for telling me like it is, Princess.” smiled Bucky.

“I told you not to call me that!” she laughed, shoving him, “SERGEANT BARNES.”

“If I shove you back, will I be held in chains in the dungeon for assaulting royalty?” he teased.

Shuri acted as if she was going to hit him with her tablet. He ducked out of the way laughing and walking quickly to the other side of the gym to stretch on the yoga mats.

“We don’t have a dungeon.” said T’Challa suddenly from the gym door, “Although, I guess you could say this lab practically is one.” He was dressed in an athletic jumpsuit.

Bucky stood, “Are you ready to get in there?”

“How much time do we have?” asked T’Challa, coming over to do his special handshake with Bucky.

“Couple hours.” answered Bucky.

“Let’s get to it then!” T’Challa smiled, holding his hand out to lead the way into the sparring room connected to the gym.

They walked slowly side by side and Shuri left the gym behind them.

“Thanks again for making arrangements for Steve’s team.” said Bucky.

Shaking his head and smiling, T’Challa said, “Not at all, not at all. You and Steve are always welcome and so are your friends, always.”

“You have just done so much for us already.” 

T’Challa got in his fighting stance, “I know...c’mon, let’s do this.”

Bucky laughed, “You asked for it…”

They began to sparr and dance around the training room.

 

Later,  
that afternoon Steve, Sam, and Natasha were flying near the Wakandan airspace.

They had to radio in their arrival to Shuri to ensure the shields would go down and allow them in.

Natasha was flying the jet with Steve at her side and Sam seated behind her. She looked over to Steve, “What was the channel I am supposed to call in?”

“Nat look out!” screamed Sam.

There was a rear view camera feed on the front of the plane showing a missile headed right toward their wings. Natasha dove the jet down to avoid it and it exploded above them.

“What the fuck? Who is that?” yelled Natasha.

Steve studied the feed from his seat, “I know that plane...where do I know that plane?”

Natasha suddenly had to dive the jet to the left to avoid another missile. “Why does it matter? We have to do something. We can’t lead this guy to Wakanda!” she said.

Steve’s mind was racing, “I know, I know….how about….we-”

There was a loud boom. A missile had barely brushed the back of their plane but it hit hard enough to send them spinning and falling out of control. Alarms were going off in the aircraft and the oxygen masks fell from the ceiling. 

Natasha held the controls as hard as she could while Steve leaned over and pulled to help her.

They were headed straight for the mountains below. Natasha started to panic when they only slightly started to slow down but were still spinning.

They missed a top of a mountain and semi crash landed in an open field between the two of them.

Heavy breathing and the steady alarm of the jet were the only sounds to be heard.

Steve shook his head in his seat and unbuckled his belt. “Sound off.” said Steve, popping his sore body back into place.

“One.” said Natasha, grunting and rubbing her head.

“Two.” groaned Sam, getting out of his seat and putting his gear on.

Steve got up and unbuckled Natasha. “You alright?” he asked, holding both sides of her face and examining her eyes.

“I’m very dizzy, hit my head on the windshield a little, but I’m okay.” she said.

He held back her blonde bangs and saw the little cut on her forehead, “It’s not that bad but you shouldn’t fight. Can you walk?”

She stood, “I can walk.” She shut off the alarm. They all put on their “tactical gear” as quick as lightning. 

“Stay here.” said Steve to Nat.

He and Sam slowly crept out of the jet to see the fighter jet parked in the distance. “Eyes up.” he said to Sam, who immediately took off into the sky to find their attacker.

Steve crouched and crept through the tall blades of grass that had to be 7 feet tall.

He was searching through the thick brush when it finally came to him where he saw the jet before.

An arm suddenly came around his throat and began to choke him.

Steve struggled in alarm for a minute, then a creepy German voice said into his ear, “I told you that Hydra will eliminate you.”

Steve body slammed him to the ground but he scuffled through the tall grass again in a flash.

Sam yelled into his head set, “Got eyes on him Steve!”

Steve followed the sound of the grass thrashing around and began running in that direction, but a “Oh NO WATCH OUT.” erupted from Sam on the headset and Steve skid to a halt and had to roll to avoid a small explosive that detonated inches from his face. 

He uncovered his face and stood, instantly running for the clearing.

When he approached the emptiest part of the field toward their wrecked jet he saw the man from one of his first missions waiting for him already, holding his hand over Natasha’s mouth with a gun to her head.

She was tied up with some kind of rope and groaning angrily through his hand.

Steve slowed to a halt in front of him and held up his hands in surrender.

The ugly bald white man smiled at Steve, “Please tell your nice winged friend to join us as well.”

Steve’s eyes were glued to him cautiously.

“Sam?” he said loudly.

Sam flew down behind him, “What do you want?” he demanded.

The man ignored Sam, “I’ve been tracking you for a long time, Captain. Since you got me locked up for petty crimes.” he said in a thick German accent, clutching Natasha with every other word.

“Stealing the wages of people trying to survive to fund terrorists aren’t petty crimes. Why are you here if we locked you up?” asked Steve.

“Let out for...good behavior.” he shrugged, “and because I blew up the prison.”

“Let her go! Your problem is with him, not us” said Sam, partly to distract the German man.

“I’m not talking to you, Negro! I’m talking to the Captain!” the man yelled, pointing his gun at Sam.

“Hey!” said Steve, stepping forward, but stopping when the man cocked the gun.

“Here is how this is going to go...we-” the man stopped mid word to look down at his chest. There was blood blooming under his breast pocket on his shirt. He cursed to himself in German.

Steve and Sam could do nothing but stare as the man was seemingly shot by silent and invisible bullets 3 more times and fell to the ground.

Natasha stood there stunned, looking down at him.

“What the?” Sam said, looking behind them with his special goggles.

He noticed a heat signature of five people although they couldn't be seen with the naked eye. 

Suddenly a hovercraft appeared in the sky as invisibility shields were lowered. It was gently landing down next to their crashed jet. 

Standing in the front of the group in the hovercraft was Bucky, all dressed in tactical gear of his own with a sniper rifle in his hands.

T'Challa stood behind him in his full Black Panther suit, along with Okoye and two other guards. 

The group came off the craft and spread out. Okoye and T’Challa went toward the enemy aircraft to check it for more agents or possible explosives. They also began extinguishing the fire from the previous explosion.

Bucky ran straight over to Steve at a full sprint. It was almost like he was the winter soldier on a mission again.

“Buck-” Steve started to say, glancing from the Hydra agent’s body to Bucky’s face.

He didn’t speak, he just grabbed Steve by the arm and whipped him around. He was scanning him with a hand held device no bigger than a cell phone. A beam of green light trailed over Steve’s body.

“What’re you-”

Bucky dug into a piece of Steve’s suit and held out what looked like a tiny metal bead in his bionic hand. “Got it.” he said.

Steve examined it. 

“Got what?” asked Sam.

“Tracker.” said Bucky, crushing the tracker to dust in his hand.

Natasha groaned, “Well it’s gone now. That’s settled. Cool, now get me out of this.”

Bucky went over to her and scanned her as well then ripped her out of her confines.

After Sam was scanned, he looked over to the dead guy lying in the grass as well. Bucky noticed and pulled a tarp out of his back pocket. He unfolded it and draped it over the Hydra agent calm as a cucumber.

The two guards were still standing on the parked hovercraft. Natasha looked around at all of the men around her, “So...what happened? How did you guys know where we were?”

Bucky shook his head, “We got an alarm that 2 aircrafts were trying to enter the airspace. We were only expecting one. When we all checked the radar, I recognized the type of craft.”

His eyes met Steve’s briefly. Steve saw a brief flash of annoyance and exasperation in his face.

“I see. How did you know about the tracker?” asked Sam.

“I just knew.” said Bucky.

T’Challa and Okoye came back through the tall grass to join the group in the clearing and announced there was nothing more to worry about.

Natasha threw up her hand in a wave, “Great news! The bags are on the plane. Also, I think I have a concussion.”

Sam came over to her and walked her to the hovercraft.

Steve shook T’Challa’s hand and thanked him. “Do you think we can fix our plane?” asked Steve.

“Oh please, Captain. We can fix anything. I will send for your craft...and the agent.” he replied in his thick Wakandan accent.

Steve stepped into the plane and grabbed all three of their duffle bags. Bucky had a bag, which was the smallest and obviously Natasha’s. He didn’t speak the whole ride back to the palace.

As soon as they got there, Natasha was taken straight to the medical center. T’Challa announced that they were all to regroup at the palace for dinner.

Everyone filed away across the royal tarmac until only the two super soldiers were left standing there.

Steve looked at Bucky and noticed he had handed off his sniper rifle to T’Challa. He picked up his bag and slung it over his shoulder. 

“To the village?” asked Steve.

Bucky nodded, “Let’s grab the craft.” The first words spoken to him directly.

“If you prefer, I can drive…” 

“I got it.” he insisted. 

Steve decided to back off for the time being. They flew into the village. It was a lot more empty than usual.

“Where is everyone?” asked Steve as they walked down the trail toward the collection of huts.

“Festival in the market. It’s like their independence day. I was going to take you.”

He tried to ignore the way Bucky said “going to take you” in his statement, as if to say “I was going to but you ruined everything, Steve.” 

They were walking side by side. Steve stared into the side of his face but he couldn’t get him to return his gaze. 

When Steve noticed the bath house coming up in front of them, he paused, “So if everyone is gone, does that mean the bath house is empty?”

Bucky stopped walking and turned to him to shrug, “Possibly. Do you need a shower?”

“After all that excitement, yeah.” 

“Alright. I can stay and look out I suppose.”

“Oh no. Believe me, you need one too pal.” Joked Steve, trying a face then a small smile.

Bucky nodded without emotion, “Alright. Let me get my towels.”

He started to his hut. Steve watched him closely. Why was he being so cold and serious? All attempts to lighten his mood were lost on him.

Steve went into the bath house, happy to find it completely deserted. He sat down his bag on the front bench and grabbed a pair of t-shirts and athletic pants for the both of them. 

He started to run the shower in the first stall when Bucky joined him, locking the door of the bath house behind him.

Steve had already removed all his gear, so he was just in his underwear.

Bucky was facing away from him, removing his own gear.

“Need any help?” offered Steve softly.

“No I don’t.” he responded flatly.

“What’s wrong?”

Bucky unsnapped his jacket and removed his vest and pants, “Nothin’, I’m fine.” He removed his metal arm and sat it next to his gear on the ground.

When he turned around in his underwear, Steve held out his arms for a hug. “Come here then.” he smiled.

“You said I need a shower…” Bucky said, eyes shifting down to his feet.

“I was partly joking. Come give me a hug. I missed you and I need to thank you for saving my ass again.” Steve stepped forward.

“This isn’t a joke, Steve.” he snapped.

Steve’s smile dropped and he slowly lowered his arms. He turned off the water to the shower and faced Bucky, “Alright, what’s going on with you? Tell me the truth.”

Bucky sighed and rolled his eyes.

Steve tried to get him to look him in the eye, “Stoppit, Buck.”

He saw the fear and the suppression of his feelings in his face.

Steve nodded and said with a concerned tone, “You had to shoot someone today, is that it?” 

“Partly!” scoffed Bucky.

“Are you…wait, are you mad at me?” he asked in disbelief, searching his face.

Bucky finally met his gaze as if to confirm the truth in his statement..

Steve huffed and crossed his arms, “Real nice. Why would you be mad at ME? I’m the one who was chased across the world and shot out of the sky.”

“You were careless, Rogers! You knew better, but you were fucking CARELESS.”

“Careless?! Like I MEANT for this to happen? I never wanted you to hurt anyone again, Buck. You made that decision just now.”

“Of Course I did! Don’t you remember our training back in the war? He had a gun on you!” Bucky raised his voice a little, “I wasn’t going to just shoot him in the leg. He was Hydra, he was just going to escape out of any prison we put him in. They are relentless, you know that. Cut off one head, 7 grow back.” His voice echoed against the tile of the building, “You let him put a tracker on you! Argue all you want, but you did. YOU LET HIM, after you promised me everything was going to be okay and I didn’t have to worry about losing you again. I almost did! And you brought Hydra so close to me, to my friends here, to our HOME. You made me do that. After what I have already been through...so yeah, I’m fucking pissed.” 

Steve dropped his head and his arms to his sides in defeat. He started to over analyze himself and question all of his actions as a freelancer. 

“I’m not letting you go ever again, Steve.” he said in a calmer tone, shaking his head, “I refuse. I will shoot a hundred more men or jump into a pit of fire if I have to. I just hate that you put me in this position...brought my biggest fear right back to my front door...”

“Buck….honestly….I should.....I should have done better.” admitted Steve, stepping closer to him.

Bucky stayed still, giving him a hurt look.

“You are right.” Steve added.

“I know I’m right..” snarled Bucky.

Staring deep into his eyes, Steve tried to get him to soften up.

At first Bucky acted as if his smoldering look wasn’t affecting him and he was too hurt and still pissed to be persuaded. 

After a few more minutes of the smolder, Steve stepped even closer. “C’mere.” he whispered, pulling their bodies together to give him a slow deep kiss.

Bucky kissed back, although a little rougher than usual. Their hard bodies rubbed together and arms encircled one another.

When they pulled back, Bucky admired his body. He looked up at him warningly, “Don’t think you are off the hook just because I’m letting this happen.”

Steve started to give him a cute bearded side smile but stopped himself and nodded.

“You know I missed you, Rogers...I’m only allowing you affection because, quite frankly, s’been a while since I’ve had it.”

Steve kissed him once more, “Allow me to take a shower with you then.”

Much to his surprise, Bucky unwrapped his arm from around his neck and stepped back, slipping his underwear off.

Immediately, Steve’s eyes roamed over his body and he removed his underwear as well, reaching blindly into the shower door to turn it back on. When they were both naked, Steve stepped into the shower stall and watched after him.

With a semi aroused look, Bucky followed behind and stood under the warm water with him.

He looked over Steve’s hair, noticing it looked even longer than before. His beard was neatly trimmed but also longer. Bucky could tell Natasha had been trimming it for him.

Steve got some soap and began to lather himself.

Bucky did the same and when they both went to rinse off, Steve turned him around and hugged him tightly from behind under the water.

“I’m sorry.” said Steve, kissing his scarred shoulder, “I was negligent...I should have been more thorough and paid more attention. Forgive me for being so stupid...again.”

His hands roamed down to grip Bucky’s hips under the pounding of the running water.

Bucky’s head hung low, letting his wet hair cling to his face. He stared down at the drain on the floor of the shower, still not saying anything, letting the warm water flow all over him.

“Please forgive me. You know I never want to put you through anymore stress. You know I’d do anything for you. I feel like a complete asshole.” he said in a soft tone, kissing Bucky’s shoulder again.

A soft chuckle vibrated through Bucky as he turned around in Steve’s arms, “I will never forgive you for being stupid, Steve. It’s just part of your personality, nothing to be sorry about. I have accepted that about you.”

Steve rolled his eyes. Walked right into that one.

“I know how you are.” Bucky said, hugging him around his torso, “You are 100% passionate about everything you do. You want to do things right, and do them right by everyone. So sometimes you miss small details, details that can get you killed. You need to realize you need to be way more secretive and undetectable than you ever used to be now you have gone rogue. You got to be non-existent, Steve. That means sometimes…..eliminating enemies. NO loose ends.”

“It’s not like it was for you.” he replied in a soft tone, looking down at him.

Bucky’s face rested against his wet chest, “You are wanted and on the run just like I was. I didn’t want to kill anyone ever again, but I did. You never wanted to, but you can. Use the power you have. It’s kill or be killed. You can’t ask permission anymore. You aren’t following anyone else’s rules. Protect the good ones, but protect yourself too.” He looked back up at Steve and said “I mean it.”

Steve kissed the wet hair on top of his head. “Okay, Buck.” he said with a serious nod.

Bucky looked down and noticed he was completely rinsed off, and a little excited. 

“Are you gonna be-” Steve started to say softly.

“I’ll be fine, Steve.” mumbled Bucky, looking back at him.

They paused and stared at each other for a second.

Suddenly their eyes were closed, mouths were ravishing each other under the water. Bucky reached over and turned it off, but when he shifted back to face Steve, he was pushed against the wall of the shower.

He was pinned by Steve’s giant hands on his hips. Their hips rocked, making their cocks rut together. Moans were passed through each other’s mouths.

Bucky’s arm slid around Steve’s neck as he kissed back roughly.  
Reluctantly, pulling Bucky’s lip with his teeth, Steve pulled back to talk to him, “Mmm, Buck….let’s take it to the hut.”

Bucky was groaning and kept thrusting against him without thinking, “Why?”

“Someone m-might want to take a shower and we locked everyone out.” smiled Steve, stepping back and unraveling his arm from around him.

They slipped out of the shower and dried off together. Bucky clicked his arm back on. Steve went to grab the clothes he got out for them but Bucky stopped him, “Don’t bother. I’m just going to rip it off of you in a minute.”

Steve raised his eyebrows in a challenging way and smirked. They tied their towels around their waists and grabbed Steve’s bag, then almost jogged to the hut.

Luckily, the village was still just as empty as when they arrived.

Bucky barely had the door shut behind him when he felt Steve’s hands pulling at his towel. He smiled and locked the door carefully, feeling the draft of his towel falling and the heat of Steve’s hard cock barely touching his backside.

“Jesus.” moaned Bucky when he felt him thrust a little into the crack of his ass. He was turned around and immediately leaned in to give Steve a hungry kiss.

They moved onto the bed without breaking their mouths apart.

Steve landed on his back, pulling Bucky on top of him to rub their erect dicks together and bringing moans out from both of them. He didn’t mind Bucky’s long wet hair was dripping all over him.

“God dammit.” whispered Bucky when he felt Steve start sucking on his neck.

Steve started getting so excited and the evidence was dripping out of him and against Bucky’s hip.

“I need you....” he whispered in Bucky’s ear.

Bucky leaned down to suck on Steve’s neck, getting a hiss and a moan in return. “I need you too....” he moaned breathily in his ear.

Steve’s hand drifted down Bucky’s lower back to his ass. He spread him apart slowly and rubbed a finger into the depth of him. A gasp escaped Bucky as he pulsed back and forth.

They kissed deeply and greedily. Steve let his primal needs take over and gave Bucky exactly what they both needed without holding back.

After all the excitement was over, the shower they took was completely wasted. The men were soon covered in a layer of sweat. When Steve had cleaned them up with his bath towel, he laid back down on the bed naked and catching his breath.

Bucky laid his head down on his chest, closing his eyes and put his human arm around Steve. They both sighed deeply, trying to even out their breathing. 

Steve stroked Bucky’s hair lovingly and looked down over his face.

“You’re still not off the hook with me.” mumbled Bucky.

“No?” said Steve softly, leaning down to kiss his cheek, “How many more times do I have to give it to you until I am, huh? Just give me a number.”

That got him a laugh in return.

“At least 70 years worth of make up sex won’t be enough, Rogers.”

Shaking his head, Steve said “You’re the worst.”

Bucky’s tablet started to make noise, making them both jump. He got out of bed to answer with voice chat.

“Bucky?” came Shuri’s voice.

“Yes? How’s Natasha?” he asked.

“She is not concussed, fortunately. She is getting cleaned up as we speak. You two will be joining us for dinner soon?”

He looked back at Steve for reassurance and agreed to be back at the palace soon. Immediately, Bucky turned off the tablet and began to put on underwear.

Steve huffed, “Does this mean we don’t have time for another shower?”

Bucky shook his head and smiled, looking him over.

With a groan, Steve stood and started to dress as well. 

After Steve was already dressed, he noticed Bucky was taking a long time buttoning up his shirt. He was cursing and muttering to himself.

“You alright?” asked Steve, tucking his thumbs into the belt loops on his jeans.

“Fine. Just so many goddamn buttons to do up that’s all. I skipped one and had to start all over.” 

He noticed Bucky had put on his metal arm but was moving his fingers too fast and was shaking too much to get the buttons in the holes and try not to rip the shirt.

“Let me.” said Steve, coming over to stand in front of him.

Bucky sighed and dropped his hands to his sides, looking up at the ceiling to avoid Steve’s eyes.

“What’s got you so nervous? It’s just dinner.” he said, buttoning him up one at a time.

“It was already going to be pretty awkward at first, but now...with the shooting and explosion and-”

“Okay. I get it. Stupid question.”

“S’what you’re best at.” Bucky said, rolling his eyes. 

When Steve finished his shirt, he crossed his arms and looked at him in the face. 

He finally met his eyes, “Alright, I’m sorry. I’ll try and calm down.”

“It would definitely be better if you did.” nodded Steve.

They stared at each other seriously and without blinking.

Steve grabbed his metal hand and gave him a crooked smile, “Sure you are good?”

“Yeah.” he replied, eyes still wide and glazed.

“Need a hug or something?”

Bucky shook his head, “Just try not to get into any more trouble today.”

“Can’t promise anything.” he smirked, leading him out of the hut.


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This chapter is starting to get into Infinity War territory. I saw Endgame, it ended me. I still can't even talk about it without crying. I am not sure if I want to change the Endgame ending or not. It will end at that story line for sure. Tell me what you guys think.

Chapter 12

 

Bucky and Steve had established a better working plan for Steve and his team to follow so they were never apart for too long and Sam and Natasha had a nice vacation spot set up.

The two super soldiers were even starting to explore more pop culture together.

He introduced Steve to 50's movies and they watched a movie a night to make sure they got to experience all the classics.

One night they were sprawled out on Bucky’s bed watching Casa Blanca on his tablet. They were lying on their stomachs propped up on their elbows. 

The main female character was told to go to her husband instead of the man she fell in love with during World War 2. The man on the screen touched the woman’s chin, “Here’s looking at you, kid.”

Bucky paused the movie, “Am I Rick?”

“What?” laughed Steve.

“Was I Rick? Did I steal you away? Or am I Victor, the dedicated type, the one you are supposed to be with?” asked Bucky.

Steve sat up, “From the movie? Our life is not Casa Blanca.”

Bucky joined him sitting up, “C’mon it’s similar. Two people, doomed from World War 2, I came back into your life after you thought you lost me and I thought I lost you...did I steal you from...from Tony?”

He let out a deep sigh, “Buck ...no, of course you didn’t. I’ve loved you my whole life. You can’t steal someone that already loves you”

“But you loved Tony. Right? Can’t you steal someone back when they were yours before?”

Steve gave him a pained look, “We’ve been through this....”

“I know. So who were you meant to be with and who was supposed to let you go?”

“I am where I am supposed to be. Why does any of this matter how we ended up together?”

“I just...watching these movies has taught me you can’t help who you fall for. There wasn’t a chance in hell for us back then. I was always going to end up going to war...also we had to sneak around constantly, people would’ve killed us if they found out. Didn’t you sneak around with Tony too?”

“Buck…” Steve groaned, giving him a pretty frustrated look, “You know I don’t like to talk about Tony.”

Bucky pouted, “I’m sorry...I just wonder about these things because...I wonder what it’d been like if you hadn’t found me before the other guys. I wonder if you would have still been with Tony...if I had not helped you fight him.”

 

With an exasperated sigh, Steve rubbed his bearded jaw, “What do you want to know?”

“You never really mentioned that much about him. I read...other couples discuss their past partners all the time.” He said, kind of embarrassed he had been looking at that kind of thing. Ultimately, he needed a reference for how things worked now with relationships.

Shaking his head, Steve told him “You don’t even like to use that word, couple, besides we aren’t like those people you read about on the internet, Buck.”

“Sure we are. I mean...we’re trying to be, right?”

Steve could see he was unsure in his face and took his hand and nodded at him, “Yes.”

“I have to read about what things are normal or not. I don’t really have much to go off of, but I know we should be able to talk about anything.”

“You’re right.”

Tucking his hair behind his ear, Bucky said “Could you just...tell me what it was like?”

They were now sitting across from each other on the bed.

Steve chewed the inside of his cheek, already feeling embarrassed. “What it was like...”

Choosing his words carefully, he said, “For you...did he make you happy? Was he good to you?”

“We...happened because of a mixture of fearing for our lives, neediness, and...convenience I suppose. It seemed like he wanted to make me happy, but...I don’t know, we didn’t want the same things. He wanted too much from me and I didn’t even know what I wanted at all. He was there for me in a sense that we were on the same team. When I was upset about Peggy passing away, he was there for me...but he wasn’t on board with helping you at all, even when I knew we were being tricked at that compound.”

“So what was the biggest problem? The accords? Or me?”

Steve blew out a deep breath, “Um...I don’t know. It kind of all happened at once, they found you were still out there, I got tipped off, the accords were explained to us, then I went to find you. It was all so fast.”

“In the hotel room in Germany...did I...complicate things even more? Be honest.”

“No...maybe a little, but Buck we were always going to break things off one way or another. He only wanted me when his girl didn’t want him...it was all a matter of right place, right time. Then, if you recall, he tried to kill us.”

Bucky looked sympathetic, “I mean, I also did some rotten stuff to him. I can’t really blame his distrust of me.”

Steve sighed and shook his head, “It’s not about who did what to who….it was how he handled things when they got rough.” He searched Bucky’s face for satisfaction, but didn’t find it.

Softly, Steve started to say “Alright, look….” he rubbed Bucky’s shoulder where the metal met skin. That made a soft moan come out of the long haired man. “I’ve only had feelings for a few people in my life. You know that.” he finished.

“Sharon?” Bucky asked, raising an eyebrow.

He laughed in response, “No. I used to think I didn’t have real feelings for you. I just thought we were close and all that stuff we used to do in our apartment was…..I don’t know...practice or something for girls?”

“We always came up with a ‘reasonable’ excuse for it, remember?” smiled Bucky, still enjoying a shoulder massage from Steve’s strong hand.

“Yeah, I guess we did...but after you, I fell for Peggy because...well, she wasn’t the biggest fan of me at first, but I found out later she was just strong willed. That’s what I realized I liked about her. That’s what I like about you too.”

“Then you fell for Tony?”

“I mean...for a time I thought I did, yes.”

“He doesn’t have a strong enough will for ya?”

“He does, don’t get me wrong, but...it’s not the kind of strength that I need.”

Bucky stopped Steve’s hand on his shoulder by covering it with his own, “It wasn’t love?”

There was a pout pulling at Steve’s bottom lip through his beard. “I mean...I used that word...but it may have just been companionship and...infatuation I guess.” Steve wasn’t sure if that was the complete truth, but telling Bucky how much he wondered if he still loved Tony would not make anyone feel better.

“I see.” nodded Bucky, looking into his eyes, trying to give him a supportive expression.

Steve started to seem a little embarrassed admitting all of this to him. It was even more embarrassing since they had been “official” for a while now and they never talked about this kind of stuff.

“It’s okay.” Bucky couldn’t help but tell him, “I’m relieved to talk like this with you. We used to share everything and it came so easily, we should be even closer if we’re...together.”

Steve brought Bucky’s skin hand down to cradle it between his, “Right...right. I just don’t want to...talk about how much of a tramp I have been lately.”

Snorting with laughter, Bucky said, “A tramp? Listen Punk, you have GOT to quit letting that Catholic guilt bubble up so much. You know you shouldn’t be so hard on yourself. You risk your life for others every day since you were born, Steve. As far as I’m concerned, you should be able to do whatever you want with that perfect body of yours.”

Steve couldn’t help but smile a little, “Sure, you would say that just because I’m doing things to YOU with this body.”

“I don’t care how many people you did things with. I don’t even care what kind of body you have, it’s not a big deal.”

“Did you have a lot of people then?” Steve said looking down at their hands.

Bucky shrugged, “You talking about people I fucked between mind swipes or assassination missions?” he said sarcastically.

Steve rolled his eyes and squeezed his hand. Bucky’s blush on his cheeks wasn’t visible through his dark beard but it spread all the way up his forehead. He refused to make eye contact as he said, “I didn’t really get with anyone because I...was being tortured around the clock. They tried to use sex as a manipulative reward system once, but I wasn’t ‘responsive’.”

Steve looked concerned as he stared over his face, “You mean-”

“They kept bringing in women….” said Bucky, finally looking back at him with a sad smile, “I didn’t want a woman.”

“Did they...hurt you...like...force-”

“No one molested me, Steve, no. They stuck to mind wiping and beatings.”

Suddenly Bucky was pulled into a tight hug. His metal arm slid around Steve’s waist and he sat his chin on his shoulder, “Hey, c’mon I did okay. Remember I had all those dames back in the day? I had my fair share.” joked Bucky.

Steve pulled back with a single laugh, “Shut up.”

“Seriously though,” said Bucky, slipping the other hand over Steve’s waist, “you know why I went out with all those girls right?”

“Tell me.” Steve said, looking deep into his eyes.

“I was in denial. I thought about you every time I was with someone and the things you and I did before...thinking about you is what made it even possible. Also, booze made it easier to picture you sometimes.” Bucky said.

That made Steve’s eyes go wide but he melted immediately, “Really?”

“Yes, really.” smiled Bucky, looking down at Steve’s pouty lips,  
"I used to think you were pretty when you were just a scrawny little thing, now look at you..."

He admired Steve’s surprised expression turn mischievous.

Steve noticed Bucky’s face becoming dark with want, "Aw, here I am thinking I was the practice for the girls. Seems like they were practice for me."

There was a smaller distance between their mouths when Bucky replied, "Not the way we do it..."

"I've actually been meaning to talk to you about that. Why don't we...switch places?"

Bucky sat back suddenly with a sly smile, "Really?"

Steve looked a little flushed and nervous, but excited, "Yeah, I mean...I'm able to actually handle it now. Why not?"

Getting on his hands and knees, Bucky surged forward to grab Steve's head and kiss him forwardly, "What're we waiting for then? Let’s go."

Steve's eyes rolled back in his head when Bucky started to kiss his neck, "Just like that?"

"Ofcourse Stevie, you know I would love to be inside you." he whispered heatedly in his ear.

A whimper escaped Steve's lips, "Buck..." He acted like he was embarrassed by the dirty talk but he actually loved it. 

Knowing the game, Bucky replied in a deep voice, "You have been thinking about how good my cock would feel, haven't you? I bet you are so tight and perfect...mmph." He laid a few kisses behind his ear. 

Steve moaned and laced his hand in the back of Bucky's hair. 

"Mmm yeah...I love when you make noise for me. I want to see how loud you get when I fill you up...." groaned Bucky, pushing Steve to lie on his back.

Steve pulled Bucky’s head up to kiss him roughly, moaning into his mouth.

“I love you.” Steve said.

With a side smile, Bucky replied, “I love you. Now take your pants off.”

“Real romantic.” sighed Steve with a smile. They removed his sweat pants and underwear together, Bucky’s hands over his.

He remained lying on his back as Bucky hovered over him and gave him a few more kisses. “You know you love it. Now, don’t freak out Stevie...I just want to try something.”

Steve raised an eyebrow, “Okay…”

While maintaining eye contact, Bucky slid down his body and kissed down his stomach. He kissed and suckled down his hip bone and thigh then slid Steve’s length into his mouth.

A shockwave rippled through Steve and his eyes closed and his head tilted back. Muffled moans immediately erupted from him.

Bucky pulled his mouth off and gently cupped under Steve’s thighs, lifting them easily and pushing his ass up. When he felt a mouth trace the vein between his balls, Steve’s eyes opened and shot down to where Bucky’s lips met his body.

Licking his balls expertly, he moved his tongue down toward his ass, making Steve gasp. He kept going down further. “What-” Steve started to ask, but cut off his statement with a groan.

With the flat of his tongue Bucky licked a long stripe right against Steve’s hole. He pulled back and looked up to see Steve’s expression, searching for a sign to stop or keep going.

Steve’s chest was heaving as his breath sped up, his eyelids squeezed shut and his eyebrows pushed together. Bucky kitten licked him two more times to test him, earning a soft moan from Steve.

“You like that?” said Bucky, moving down to kiss and suck his hole.

Steve was so caught up in the sensation of Bucky’s bearded face rubbing against him, he couldn’t form words. The only thing that came out was a long deep grunt in agreement.

Bucky sat up and moved one of Steve’s hands to his dick and told him to start jerking off.

Reluctantly when Steve started to touch himself, Bucky left the bed and bolted over to his storage trunk. When he returned to the bed, he was holding a small silicone device shaped like a small ice cream cone and a bottle of lube.

Steve stared at him through droopy eyes.

After covering the small toy with lube and watching Steve touch himself for a minute, Bucky said “Alright, we’re gonna get you nice and stretched. Y’might want to take your shirt off. This could get messy.”

With a wicked smile, Steve sat up and tugged off his shirt.

 

\---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

 

About a year passed of the nice routine for Cap and his team.

After a few more trips to Wakanda, Sam and Bucky even started to bond a little. (Bucky was teaching Sam the secrets of farming/botany, in return Sam was teaching Bucky about 70s music.)

Natasha had been working and bonding with Shuri, getting lots of new gadgets from her.

They always had to keep their visits semi-short so they could get back to work, but it became a real vacation home for the 3 heroes.

On a mission in the Isle of Man, Steve, Nat, and Sam had gotten a safe house in the middle of the small island. It was more of a hut, but it had a functioning bathroom and 3 beds. That was good enough for them.

While playing cards with Natasha at their very small table, Steve got a call.

Sam was lying on his cot reading. He didn’t look up.

Steve stood from the table when he checked to see who was calling.

“What’s wrong?” Natasha said, furrowing her brow.

Going pale in the face, Steve answered, “It’s Tony.”

Sam sat straight up, throwing his book on the ground, “TONY?”

The phone continued to ring. Natasha realized it was going on the 4th tone when she exclaimed “Hurry up answer it Steve!”

He fumbled and flipped it open and cleared his throat, “H-Hello?”

Steve listened intently, his stomach doing flip flops. Natasha stood and came closer to stand next to him and listen. He went stiff and stared at Natasha, “Bruce?! Is that really you?”

Natasha covered her mouth with both hands. She couldn’t hold back the tears falling from her widened eyes. This was the first time Bruce had contacted anyone in 2 years.

“Whoah, whoa...slow down.” said Steve, pacing a little.

Sam was listening as hard as he could from his cot, looking back and forth from Natasha to Steve.

“He what? When exactly?” Steve said to Bruce, “Got it. Ofcourse we can get them to Rhodey. Do you know where they are? Okay, sure we can get there no problem. Are you okay? Alright. See you soon. Also, it’s good to hear your voice. We’ve been worried about you.” Steve stared into Natasha’s eyes sympathetically as he said goodbye and flipped his phone shut.

Natasha wiped her tears and crossed her arms, trying to look calm, “So...uh, how did he sound?”

Steve rubbed his hand over his beard and sighed, “Good, healthy at least. He was in a panic. Apparently aliens attacked New York again. Tony and the spider kid flew away on a spaceship after them. We have to find Wanda and Vision, he is going to the Avengers base, and he’ll send their location.”

Natasha sat back down at the table, her eyes looking blank as she went over everything he just said.

Sam went over to her and rubbed her back, getting her to smile a little.

“Where has he been?” asked Natasha.

Steve crossed his arms and tossed the phone onto the table, “He didn’t have the time to say. He said he would explain things to us when we met him and Rhodey at base.”

“So we’re doing that? The fighting aliens thing?” asked Sam, giving him a slight smile.

“If we have to. You ready?” nodded Steve in his hero voice.

“Only if you guys are.” said Sam, looking down at Natasha.

Natasha sniffed and exchanged stares with the two of them, “I mean, obviously.” Sam hugged her, earning a grunt and laugh mixture. 

“You need to tell Bucky. Warn them in Wakanda that something big is going down.” said Natasha to Steve.

He nodded, “I know...I just don’t want to drop this on him. I know if I tell T’Challa before him he will be pissed at me.”

“Just go step outside and call them.” said Sam.

Steve huffed and took his phone out onto the porch of the house.

When he called, Bucky picked up on the other line immediately, “Great timing. I have news!”

Bewildered slightly, Steve decided to remain calm and light hearted to humor him, “What’s that?”

“My goat is pregnant! Little Myla, the white one.”

Steve’s heart was warmed. Bucky never sounded that excited about anything. It pained him to have bad news for him when things were finally going so well. 

He maintained his happy tone, “That’s insane. How do you know?”

“We took her to get a scan. We have a livestock doctor out here. She can have up to 3 kids. I didn’t even know that!” Bucky said.

Steve laughed. Bucky’s fascination with farming through the eyes of a tough city kid was always so cute. He wanted to listen to his goat chatter all night, just to keep him happy about something.

“That’s wild, Buck. Do I get to help name them?” said Steve softly.

“Of Course. I’m going to name one of them after you if there is a boy. Grant, Grant the goat.”

Steve scoffed, “No don’t do that. Then it will be destined to be a scrawny idiot that doesn’t back down from a fight.”

“Yeah, well...I’ll get him a shield. Shuri could make a serum for him. That should help.”

They giggled together for a second.

Steve snorted, “Alright fine.”

“What’s going on with you guys? Gonna see you in a week still right?” asked Bucky.

“You...might see me sooner than that. We are going to have to cut this mission short and switch paths entirely...” Steve told him, leaning on the rail of the porch.

`Bucky immediately realized there was a somber change in his tone, “What happened?” he interjected.

“Um...it’s aliens. Like how I told you about, a few years ago...in New York. We’re going to have to do damage control.” Steve told him vaguely.

It wasn’t a lie but it wasn’t the truth.   
Steve was half hoping he wasn’t going to have to tell him anything specific until after the fight was over and solved. This could all be a funny story.

“Aliens? What?” asked Bucky.

“We just need to get ‘em out of here or locked up somewhere. We have done it before. From what I understand, they are a lot smaller this time.” said Steve with a smile, “It might be fine.”

“Don’t you dare make a promise you can’t keep, Rogers.”

“I’m not promising anything. What I meant was, ‘I’m sure it will be okay.”

There was a sigh on Bucky’s end of the phone, “Yeah, right.”

“Look, I’ll keep you updated alright? I will check in again soon. Right now that’s all I know.” Steve said, sounding like he was closing the conversation.

“I love you.” said Bucky sternly.

Steve paused for a second, closing his eyes. Hearing the sadness in Bucky’s voice, Steve made sure his tone sounded much happier and loving, “I love you too, Buck. Goodnight. I will call tomorrow.”

“Night.” said Bucky before ending the call.

As he held the cellphone in his hand, Steve stared out into the hills of the dark countryside. He felt so many different things at once. After a year of trying to get his emotions in check, Steve felt completely lost again and scared.

Could this attack be it? Could this be the end of the human race and fall on him?

\-------------------------------------------------

Rhodey, Vision, Wanda, Bruce, and Steve’s crew were all at the Avenger’s base.

They sat around the lounge area in the living room. Natasha, Sam, and Steve were all still in their hero gear. Rhodey brought over some finger food and water for them and sat them on the coffee table.

Bruce and Natasha were staring at each other from either side of the room while Rhodey caught up with Wanda and Vision on the sectional couch.

Steve was sitting next to Natasha on the couch, zoning in and out, worrying about Tony. His gut churned from the stress and the guilt of how he wished he had helped when Tony needed him (Bruce had told them that Tony suggested to call Steve before they got in a fight with the aliens.) and how hurt he would feel if something bad happened to Tony. He wished he had just called once...

“Huh Steve?” asked Rhodey.

He shook his head and perked up suddenly, “What was that?” 

Rhodey smiled, “Has a lot changed with you?” He sat down on the right of Steve.

Natasha looked at Steve’s face, urging him to tell everyone what had been going on.

Sam sat at the far end of the couch on Natasha’s left, “Tell em about Wakanda.”

Steve shrugged and directed his words to Wanda, Vision, and Rhodey, “Yeah just been fighting the good fight and we spend all our off-time in Wakanda. King T’Challa has given us a kind of temporary home for when we stay there and we can still train while we are there.”

“Wow, seems like you guys have gotten to be good friends now.” said Rhodey.

“Bucky’s there too?” asked Wanda.

Steve gave him a small smile, knowing she would catch on immediately. He prepared for what he feared would be an awkward conversation.

“Yeah...he’s cured. No more Winter Soldier. Shuri helped him. You’ll have to meet her. She is brilliant.” he said.

Wanda gave him an understanding look, “That’s amazing. I am glad for him.” 

He remembered how close they became when she first moved into the compound and felt guilty again. “Me too. Look, I’m sorry I never tried to contact you. I wondered how you were doing but didn’t want to put any of you at risk in case I was...still in trouble.” said Steve.

While Vision held up his hand, Wanda shook her head, “Please...I understand. I only trusted Rhodey with my location in case I was necessary for things like this. I am still your friend, Steven.” she said,

That made him sit back and let out a sigh of relief. 

“So is Wakanda a good vacation spot? Do they have an amusement park or something?” asked Rhodey.

Natasha laughed, “Not exactly.”

Sam held up a hand, “They do have a water park.”

“It’s beautiful. They have modern capital and small villages and markets, lots of farms, and everything you need.” Steve told him.

“Everything you need.” repeated Natasha, teasingly.

Steve gave her a “cut it out” look.

Wanda smiled, “You and Bucky spend a lot of time together?”

“Yeah. He has picked up some farming skills and sometimes we fish or play with the kids in the village.” he said casually, looking down at his feet.

“Aw...Steve, that’s beautiful.” she replied, subtly reading his thoughts.

“What’s beautiful about-...” said Rhodey, pausing, then looking over Steve, then to his smiling buddies next to him. “Oh.” he laughed, then stopped, then said again quieter “Oh. I see.”

Steve’s head shot up, “Yeah, I…we-”

“You don’t have to explain. It’s...fine.” Rhodes told him, patting his shoulder, “I understand. That’s great, man. I am happy for you, well, for you both.”

He nodded, “Thank you James.” 

Bruce sat down on the chair across from the sectional, “Are you happy?”

Everyone looked over at Banner, then back to Steve.

Steve stroked his beard and smiled, “Yeah, I think I am. It’s weird to admit it aloud.”

“Because you are scared once you admit it, then you have something to be ripped away?” asked Bruce, giving him that token sad smile.

“Sure.” Steve nodded.

Bruce nodded back, glancing over at all his teammates. “I get it.” he murmured. 

Natasha sat forward, “Have you been happy?” she asked Bruce accusingly.

His eyes snapped to her. “Where have you been for 2 years? You should be the one apologizing for not contacting anyone.” she said.

Steve put his hand on her shoulder, urging her to calm down.

Bruce sat back and sighed, “I’ve been...out of commission.”

Natasha squinted at him.

He seemed defensive as he explained “I swear, I’ve been Hulk this whole time! I was flying around in space then I was held captive, well, sort of. This guy on another planet had been making me fight aliens for money like some kind of Gladiator pet. When I changed back to me, I had already lost 2 years. I barely remember bits and pieces.” Bruce rambled.

“What changed you back?” asked Natasha.

“Thor.” he replied.

“Thor?! You were with Thor recently? Where is he now?” asked Rhodey.

“I don’t know...still in space? Asgard was destroyed. Last thing I remember we were flying in a ship with their people and we were stopped by the aliens and the ship was blown up. Most of their people were killed. I was blasted here, I don’t really remember how...then I found Dr.Strange and Tony.” Bruce said solemnly.

Steve looked over his sad face, “I’m sure Thor is okay.” he assured, “He is a God.”

“Asgard was destroyed? By what?” asked Vision.

“Might have been Thor’s evil sister, or the fire demon...I can’t be sure. I just remember seeing it crumble.”

Everyone silenced at that last statement. Their universe had gotten a lot bigger and more complex.

“What do you remember about these aliens? Tell us everything.” said Steve, putting on his stern face.

“I can brief you all you want, but while we do that we need to get a hold of an army. That’s all we can do. This is definitely a declaration of War. They want something and will destroy everything to get it.” said Bruce.

“My stone.” Vision said, touching his forehead.

They collectively decided to call T’Challa and get him going with a battle plan. Steve feared the angry phone call from Bucky, but it never came.

When everyone had settled around in the bedrooms in the compound for the night, Steve decided to sleep on the giant sectional sofa in the living room. He was tucking a sheet into the couch when he got a text from Bucky.

“I got a new arm.” it read.

“Better?” replied Steve.

“Real powerful. I’ve had to train with it. Also been target shooting. Were you going to tell me about this fight or did you plan to make T’Challa tell me?”

“I have been busy. I’m sorry. Thanks for texting, know you hate it.” Steve wrote.

“You are lucky I love you so much.” said Bucky.

Steve smiled and wrote back “You’re right I am lucky. I will see you soon.”

“Okay, Punk. I’m trusting you.” he responded.

Steve clicked his phone shut and plopped down on the couch with a pillow and blanket. He laid in a tshirt and his boxers, staring out the giant glass walls in the living room. 

While staring at the stars, he wondered if Tony was still in space and worried about how long it would take to get a message from him if he got stuck out there. 

Rhodey walked into his field of vision from the pale kitchen light glow behind the couch.

Steve put his arms behind his head, “You need something?”

Rhodey was wearing a sweatsuit and had his arms crossed tightly. He nodded, “I just wanted to see how you were. It’s been a while.”

“I’m fine. A little concerned with this whole...situation, but this is my duty, isn’t it?” Steve said with a bearded side smile.

“I guess we all feel that way, sure.” Rhodey agreed, “That’s good have you have a positive outlook on it.”

“I have to.” he laughed.

 

“Why’s that?”

“Bucky said all the kids are saying these days ‘I’m here for a good time, not a long time.’. I got a kick out of that, and it’s funny because I shouldn’t still be here. I’m on borrowed time. This time was given to me for a reason so I decide what that reason is, and I decide how I handle the pressure.” 

“Now you sound just like Tony…” said Rhodes, shaking his head and smiling.

“How is- How WAS Tony doing?” asked Steve.

 

He shrugged, “Tony’s been sober, other than weed...but I think he is down to weekend use only. Pepper and he picked a decoy wedding date and an actual wedding date...although, she called me earlier after he called her and...she was not happy.”

 

“What did he say to her?” Steve asked, sitting up straight.

“That he was on the ship and would probably not be back for a while. That he was sorry.”

Steve’s eyes glazed over and he looked completely mortified.

Rhodey uncrossed his arms, “She begged him to come back and he didn’t. He is stubborn. He thinks he can do everything but he is only human. Tony’s only one man…” he paused and rubbed his chin harshly, “and he’s my favorite man in the world, unfortunately. He’s my oldest friend.”

Steve sighed, “We got to get these guys to back down. Get them out of here, and find Tony.”

“Wouldn’t that be nice if there was no fighting or casualties...”

“You shouldn’t come to Wakanda with us though, Rhodey. It’s not-”

“Safe? Oh please. I’m a soldier, just like you. Ofcourse I’m going. Don’t worry about my legs or my ‘condition.’ My suit walks for me. I’m going to help find Tony too, man. We’re all involved in this.” he said with a matter of fact tone.

Steve nodded, “You’re right, sorry.” He felt a little defeated.

Rhodey looked him over, “I know you are worried about all of us, but you can’t let your fear overshadow leadership. Don’t let worrying about Bucky or Tony compromise your emotions.”

He shook his head and furrowed his brow, holding his arms around his knees, “I’m not. I...am trying to just be more careful lately.”

“None of that matters now. We basically asked T’Challa for troops and a battlefield at this point. We are way past being careful. The team knows how this all may end and they are fighting anyway. You are one of our strongest assets, so you got to stay alive and let your team have your back. Not just Sam and Nat, the whole team.” said Rhodey.

Steve’s eyes softened, “Now YOU sound like Bucky.”

That made Rhodey scoff, amused, and start to pace toward the bedrooms. “On that note, I’m gonna go to bed. You should try and rest too.” he said.

“Sure thing.” he said, laying back again. 

Rhodey said goodnight over his shoulder and left.

Steve reached for his phone and read the last message from Bucky over and over again. He resisted calling him for as long as he could, but he gave up.

He heard the dialing tone for a minute before Bucky answered, sounding a little tired.

“Steve? You okay?” he answered.

“Hey Buck. I’m fine. I just wanted to hear your voice.” Steve said, staring off into the sky again.

Bucky paused, “You don’t sound fine. Want to talk?”

“I guess.”

“I’m here.” he said lovingly.

Steve sighed, “I’m...pretty scared...for us.”

“Me too,” sighed Bucky, “but we’ve done this before. We made it through battle and experiments and torture. Between the two of us, we are unstoppable. We can do anything.”

“I know....” he replied.

“It’s not just something nice to say, Steve. It’s just the facts. We’re fucking super soldiers, SOLDIERS. This is what we do.” said Bucky flatly.

“I didn’t want to make you do anything like this again.” Steve told him.

Bucky sighed, “I want to help. I’m not going to just sit here with this cool new arm and do nothing. I’m going to fight, going to come to your side when you do something stupid, always.”

“Thank you for that.”

“Who else will? Even Natasha and Sam are getting sick of doing that for you.”

They both paused and let out a few humored breaths.

“We promised each other though right? I’ll be there.” said Bucky, “End of the line. You and me are going to scare the shit out of some aliens.”

Steve tried to sound hopeful, “You’re right.”

“Remember when we did that block party one legged race back in Brooklyn? On your 16th Birthday?” asked Bucky, “It’s just like that.”

Steve let out a single laugh, “I remember. It’s not quite like that, but I see what you are saying.”

“If you fall, or even start to, I will knock everyone down from here to next week so we can just find the end of that line. On our own terms, huh?” said Bucky, finding it funny he was the one comforting Steve.

Touched by his words, Steve told him, “Yeah, absolutely.”

“We’ll be in Wakanda, you know what it’s like here. We’ll kick ass.” 

Steve started to feel overwhelmed with emotion again. He decided to get off the phone before he let them take him under.

They shared some affectionate words, Bucky told him he would see him the next day, and they hung up.

\-------------------------

Location: Wakanda  
Time: Before the great Infinity War

 

On the tarmac at the palace, Bucky and Steve shared a hug, their fellow heroes behind them.

“How you been, Buck?” he asked, referring to the past night.

“Not bad, for the end of the world.” he smiled, keeping it light.

They all went with T’Challa into the lab to try and determine how to remove the stone safely from Vision. Bucky and Sam came in to warn them of the intruding alien aircraft.

Everyone began scrambling and preparing for battle. Steve went into the storage room of Shuri’s lab to get his two black Wakandan arm shields.

Shuri was explaining to him how they worked as Bucky joined them in the room. His gun was strapped to his back and he was watching them intently. His eyes were a little glossy as they heard T’Challa calling orders in the craft bays.

Steve flexed a few times to work with the tech of the shields.

“There you go.” said Shuri, turning and looking from Steve’s face to Bucky’s, “Now if you excuse me, I have work to do.” She hurried out of the storage room, the door closing behind her.

Bucky stepped closer to Steve, looking over his face.

Steve held his arms out and open where he was holding onto the shields.

“This is it.” said Bucky, his expression distant as he admired Steve’s beauty.

“Sure is. You ready?” asked Steve, giving his best charming smile.

Bucky leaned forward and put his hands on each side of Steve’s face. He gave him a deep, slow kiss, pausing a bit here and there to pull back and look at him. Steve kept his arms out to the sides of him, kissing back passionately.

Bucky separated from him breathlessly and ran his metal hand through Steve’s hair to slick it back, “I’m ready to follow you anywhere, baby.” 

Steve looked a little surprised at the pet name but still gave him a smirk. That made Bucky return the smirk and look down at his boots. 

His hands were lightly resting on Steve’s perfect hips.  
“Listen Buck, if I don’t make it…” started Steve, but Bucky leaned up and stopped him with another hard kiss.

“Stop.” he said, putting their foreheads together and holding the metal hand on the side of Steve’s jaw.

Their eyes were closed.

“I’m the negative one, remember?’ whispered Bucky, “We can do this. Even if we can’t, we will fight anyway.”

Steve leaned forward to kiss him this time. He kissed along Bucky’s cheek then turned his head to move his lips softly to the metal hand.

There were a few more kisses placed on Bucky’s lips before Steve pulled back pleasantly. He tried to keep how he felt in his mind, trying to keep the joy and motivation present.

Bucky took a step back and Steve put his arms down to his sides.

“Let’s go, Captain.” said Bucky, opening the door and leading the way out of the room.

Steve took a deep breath and followed close behind.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This chapter took me a long time to complete because I wanted to show a range of what being in a "different/not common type" of relationship is like. Recently my own relationship has become a bit more complicated since my partner has come out as Trans. I am staying with them and being supportive but there are a lot of emotions floating around. (Such as my month long spout with depression.) Ultimately you love who you love, and I hope I portrayed that well enough. Also, there is less Tony story now because he got a ton of screen time and I am really trying to fill in the gaps.


End file.
